3
- 3 years ago
Homesick, bankrupt, and father-less, young Dan Lok was devastated when he arrived home one day to find his mom in tears. His riveting coming-of-age story will inspire you to put your best foot forward every single day.
Category
🎈
FunTranscript
00:00 I was becoming very good at becoming the invisible kid.
00:02 I was born in Hong Kong.
00:04 I immigrated to Canada when I was 14 years old.
00:08 First day, I didn't even go out the door.
00:10 I was so afraid.
00:11 I was one of the only three Chinese in my school.
00:13 I was getting bullied, I was getting beat up,
00:16 I was getting pushed around.
00:17 I would never ask questions, never put up my hand.
00:19 Right after school, I would just grab my backpack,
00:21 go to my locker, not look at anyone,
00:23 not make any eye contact, and just go home.
00:25 Shortly after that, my mom and dad got divorced
00:28 when I was 16 years old.
00:29 One day when I came home from school,
00:32 my mom would stay in the bedroom.
00:34 She was talking on the phone with somebody.
00:36 And then after the phone call, she opened up the door
00:39 and I could see she was crying.
00:41 I said, "Mom, is everything okay?"
00:43 She's like, "Well, you know, I was talking on the phone
00:46 "with the dad and he just told me he went bankrupt.
00:49 "Just filed for bankruptcy.
00:50 "He couldn't send us money anymore."
00:53 My mom was always a very positive,
00:57 it's just like an angel to me.
00:58 But that's the first time in my entire life
01:02 that I looked at my mom now in a country
01:05 where she doesn't speak the language,
01:07 son doesn't, kind of going through high school.
01:11 Her face, the hopelessness.
01:16 I said, "I don't care what effort it takes,
01:19 "I never wanna see that again."
01:20 I had no father figure, I had no role model.
01:23 My father, quote unquote, father figure,
01:25 was when I watched, it was late night.
01:27 I was watching a Bruce Lee movie.
01:30 It was Way of the Dragon, where he fought Chuck Norris
01:34 and he was a guy who couldn't speak English,
01:37 went to Rome and got criticized
01:42 and then suddenly he was kicking ass and protecting people.
01:45 So he became my hero.
01:46 In a way, virtually he became that father figure
01:49 I never had, that strong, muscular, strong,
01:53 like kick-ass kung fu master, right?
01:56 Right after that, near my house, there was a karate school.
01:59 So I signed up for the karate school.
02:01 That gave me the confidence, that gave me courage.
02:03 And then from there, I just made a commitment.
02:05 Whatever it takes.
02:06 I said, "I don't need my dad, I'll be the man of the family.
02:08 "I'll take care of my mom."
02:10 So that's when I started thinking about,
02:11 okay, how can I do something to make some money?
02:14 And I was mowing lawns for people,
02:16 I was delivering paper, anything that would make a buck.
02:20 Really, I was trying all kinds of business ideas.
02:23 And then afterwards, I started my own
02:25 one-man advertising agency.
02:27 And that was my first taste of success.
02:31 Was being able to provide for my mom.
02:34 Finally, now I could go to the grocery store
02:37 and not have to go to the expire,
02:38 almost expire, section to buy fruit and vegetables.
02:42 That was really, very much the turning point.
02:45 So afterwards, so I haven't talked to my dad
02:48 for a number of years, right?
02:49 Because I was angry at him.
02:50 Until I had matured a little bit,
02:53 then I call him and then we would talk about what happened.
02:56 And he could see me, you know, being, doing very well.
03:02 I was making about $10,000 a month as a young guy,
03:05 six figure a year.
03:06 I knew he was just getting by.
03:11 And he was worrying about a place to live.
03:16 So at that time, I went back to Hong Kong.
03:19 And I was walking down the street,
03:23 the city in Hong Kong.
03:25 We stopped.
03:27 I said, I said, I look, I said, "Dad,
03:28 "you see that window up there?"
03:33 Yeah.
03:33 I reached in my pocket.
03:36 I pull a set of keys.
03:38 I put it in his hands.
03:40 That little puzzle.
03:46 I said, "Dad, I bought that unit for you.
03:49 "You got a place to live in now.
03:51 "This is yours."
03:53 He was bawling.
03:55 All he could say, he said, "Son, let's go get lunch."
04:01 That look made everything worthwhile.
04:04 At the time, we talked and said, you know,
04:08 "Next week, son, I'm going into the hospital
04:10 "for a regular checkup."
04:12 And then I know the day after he did a checkup,
04:15 I didn't get the call.
04:16 I thought it was a bit strange.
04:18 The next day, I got a call from my aunt.
04:20 I pick up the phone, it was like 3 a.m.,
04:23 very late at night.
04:25 Your dad's in emergency.
04:26 I said, "What happened?"
04:28 "Well, he found that he needs surgery immediately.
04:31 "We need to operate him."
04:33 But at the time, I was chasing the biggest deal,
04:38 the biggest deal I've ever done in my life.
04:41 I said, "I have to be in the U.S.
04:43 "I gotta finish this before I would come back
04:45 "because it's a very important deal."
04:46 I had to do a little video conference with my dad.
04:49 I could see him in the hospital, hair all gray.
04:52 He had this tube, he couldn't speak.
04:54 So I said, "Dad, as soon as I finish,
04:58 "I will come back and see you."
05:00 Right, and I thought I would make him proud.
05:01 I thought I would close the deal.
05:03 I go to Hong Kong, I never thought about it.
05:05 And that was the last time I talked to him.
05:11 That was it.
05:14 I never got to say goodbye.
05:15 I never got to say anything.
05:19 It's the biggest regret.
05:23 It's truly the biggest regret.
05:24 And I wish I had, knew I had.
05:28 And from that point on,
05:34 I realized something, that I was
05:42 chasing achievement.
05:44 I was chasing all these things.
05:48 And when suddenly my dad was gone,
05:49 suddenly all this stuff means a lot less.
05:52 It suddenly means a lot less to me about
05:54 fame, money, wealth, all this stuff.
06:00 I think I believe in life you go through
06:04 kind of four stages.
06:05 First stage is what I call survival,
06:07 which is where I was when I was very young.
06:12 And then going from survival to security.
06:15 You're paying the bill.
06:17 You've got a roof over your head.
06:18 You've got a car.
06:19 You're taking care of your family.
06:21 And then a percentage of the people would
06:24 move to what I call stage three, which is success.
06:27 When you're successful, you don't just have
06:29 everything you need, you have everything you want.
06:32 And I operate in that phase, at that stage,
06:35 for the first, I would say, 10 years of my career.
06:39 And then after that incident, after my dad passed away,
06:42 then I shift from success to significance.
06:45 When you shift from success to significance,
06:47 it's no longer just about you.
06:50 It's no longer just about, hey, here's what I want.
06:52 Here's what I want to have.
06:54 Here's what I want to own.
06:55 From a poor immigrant boy who couldn't speak
06:58 a word of English, now my work is impacting
07:00 people in 100 countries.
07:02 It sounds so cliche, but it is what's your legacy?
07:05 What's your impact?
07:07 What do you want to leave behind?
07:08 What do you want to be known for after you're gone?
07:11 Our society, we don't take the time
07:14 to just slow down a bit to be grateful
07:16 and find the little things to be grateful.
07:18 The people around me, my family, my friends,
07:20 my team, my students, every little thing.
07:24 All the tragedy, all the mistakes,
07:28 all the headaches, all the hardship.
07:31 You might not like it, you would probably hate it,
07:35 but you would look back and that would be
07:37 the greatest thing that ever happened to you.
07:40 All depends on how you interpret it.
07:43 And that's why people, they keep chasing and chasing
07:45 and chasing the next thing.
07:47 They're never happy.
07:48 If you're not grateful with what you have,
07:50 you're not gonna be grateful even you have more.
07:52 So I say it's be grateful with what you have
07:55 while you strive for more.
07:57 (upbeat music)
07:59 (upbeat music)
08:02 (upbeat music)
08:04 (upbeat music)
08:07 (upbeat music)
08:10 (dramatic music)
08:12 [MUSIC]