- 1 week ago
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00:00The day my acceptance letter arrived, I finally realized I was the only one heading to the West Coast.
00:05Back when we were filling out applications, Ethan told me,
00:08Amanda applied to the same school. The three of us will go together. We'll look out for each other.
00:12I believed him. Growing up, my dad always thought I was too independent.
00:15My stepmom, on the other hand, constantly shielded Amanda.
00:18And my brother Noah never called me anything but Summer, though he always called Amanda sis.
00:23My birthdays were forgotten. My room was cleared out.
00:25Even when I pulled straight A's, all my dad would say was,
00:28Don't put too much pressure on Amanda.
00:31Only Ethan, when I was left out in the cold, said he'd always stand behind me.
00:35In the family group chat, Noah sent an excited voice message.
00:38Now Amanda and Ethan can be together every day.
00:40I stared at the screenshots of their two matching acceptance letters, and my eyes stung.
00:45Inside the study, Amanda asked softly,
00:47Do you think Summer will be mad at you?
00:49Ethan was quiet for a moment.
00:51She's strong. She'll figure it out on her own.
00:54I'll stay here and take care of you first. Once you're settled, I'll explain it to her.
00:59Holding that letter to the West Coast, it suddenly hit me.
01:02Maybe the West Coast wasn't such a bad idea. At least no one could ignore me there anymore.
01:08I didn't open the study door. Their voices drifted out.
01:12But what if Summer actually gets angry?
01:15Ethan's voice was utterly certain.
01:16She won't. Once I explain, she won't stay mad. She's always been like that.
01:20Right. Always been like that.
01:22Because I cared. I never dared to actually get angry when they hurt me.
01:25So even when my birthday was forgotten, even when I had to give up my room,
01:28even when I was told my good grades were just me pressuring Amanda,
01:31I never let myself get angry.
01:33I thought Ethan was different, so I held on even tighter.
01:36But in the end, they tricked me into changing my application.
01:39The two of them went to the same school, leaving me to go to the West Coast alone.
01:42Looking at the acceptance letter, I was lost in my memories.
01:45Back in senior year, my homeroom teacher handed me the materials
01:49and said it was a joint training project between the university and a Western research base.
01:54The early stages involved closed training at the base with follow-up research.
01:58Project location and personnel files were only disclosed to the program team and authorized contacts.
02:03I hadn't planned on joining.
02:05I gave it up willingly because of one sentence from Ethan
02:07that he wanted to go to the same university I did, but I didn't need to now.
02:11When I got back to my room, Amanda was crouched in front of my closet, organizing clothes.
02:15She hung one of her dresses in the slot I used most.
02:18My old desk was covered with her university acceptance letter
02:20and the checklist Ethan had made for her.
02:22She saw me, her hands still resting on the closet door.
02:26Summer, you're back.
02:27Mom said since you're leaving for the West Coast soon, your room would just be empty.
02:31I figured with the university close by, it'd be convenient to come back on weekends to study.
02:36So I just put a few things here first.
02:39I didn't say anything. I just looked at her.
02:42That desk. My dad built it with his own hands for my 10th birthday.
02:46He worked late that night, cut his finger on a screw, and still grinned as he patted my head.
02:51Our summer's going to university someday.
02:53She'll have lots of books. Needs a big desk.
02:56After my mom died, what I dreaded most was someone asking.
03:02Where's your mom?
03:03In third grade, a classmate called me a kid nobody wanted and threw my backpack in the trash.
03:08I hid in a bathroom stall, crying, too scared to go back to class.
03:11It was Ethan who grabbed my backpack for me and chased those kids away.
03:15He was only 10, too.
03:16The back of his hand got scratched and bled, but he stood in front of me, fierce and defiant.
03:21Later, my dad came to get me and bought two hot chocolates.
03:24I asked him through tears.
03:27Dad, since I don't have a mom, does nobody like me?
03:31My dad stroked my hair and said,
03:33Who told you that? You have a dad. Dad will always like Summer.
03:37I drank that hot chocolate so happily.
03:39But later, both my dad and Ethan forgot the things they'd said.
03:42One found me a stepmother. The other gave his affection to my stepmother's daughter.
03:46Summer?
03:48Amanda said my name again, her eyes slightly red.
03:50Are you upset?
03:53I can take my things away if you want.
03:55Her mouth said that, but her hand never left my closet.
03:58My dad walked in with a plate of fruit.
04:00He saw Amanda standing by my closet and immediately frowned.
04:03Summer, are you giving Amanda attitude again?
04:06I looked at him.
04:07I didn't say anything.
04:08You didn't have to.
04:09My dad set the fruit plate down.
04:11That face of yours is scary enough. Amanda's timid.
04:13Stop always making her feel like an outsider.
04:15An outsider.
04:16Those three words should have been for Amanda.
04:18But over the past four years, the one who really felt like an outsider was always me.
04:23Amanda had been in our house four years and still called my dad Mr. Wilson.
04:27The more she acted like a guest, the more desperately my dad tried to prove this family didn't shortchange her.
04:33Debra walked in to smooth things over.
04:35Honey, don't talk to Summer like that.
04:36She's been without a mom since she was little.
04:39It's normal she's a little stubborn.
04:41Summer, Amanda's just putting a few things here for now.
04:44You're the kindest.
04:45Just give way a little for her, okay?
04:47She just got into university.
04:49She's already nervous.
04:50Don't let family stuff affect her mood.
04:51There it was again.
04:52She always sounded like she was speaking up for me.
04:54It somehow turned me into the unreasonable one.
04:57I was tired.
04:58Got it.
04:59She can put whatever she wants.
05:00That's more like it.
05:02My dad didn't ask about my acceptance letter.
05:04Didn't ask about the West Coast.
05:06Didn't ask if I was scared going so far away all alone.
05:08Because they've long since decided the answers for me.
05:11Summer isn't scared.
05:12Summer can handle it.
05:13Summer should give way.
05:14I pulled open a drawer and took out the training program confirmation form.
05:19I opened my phone and pressed the confirmation.
05:24Amanda was still discussing with my dad whether to put a new storage bin next to my desk.
05:29My dad nodded.
05:29Summer's going to the West Coast anyway.
05:31Won't be back much.
05:32I smiled a little.
05:33Right.
05:33Won't be back much.
05:34Then I just won't come back at all.
05:37At dinner,
05:38Noah came running in from the living room clutching his toy truck.
05:42Sis!
05:43But he ran right past me and threw himself into Amanda's arms.
05:46Amanda!
05:47Summer!
05:48Ethan says he's taking you to see the university!
05:51Amanda smiled and pinched his cheek.
05:53You want to come too?
05:55Yeah!
05:56Noah was five now.
05:57My dad and Deborah's kid.
05:59When he first learned to talk,
06:00my dad taught him to call me Sis.
06:02But he always called Amanda Sis.
06:04And me, Summer.
06:05Summer.
06:06My dad just smiled and said,
06:07He's still little.
06:08He'll get there.
06:09Years passed.
06:10He still called me by my name.
06:11I knew he'd never really seen me as his sister.
06:13My dad cut a piece of grilled chicken breast
06:15and put it in Amanda's bowl.
06:18Yes.
06:19Amanda, you've lost weight lately.
06:20Eat more.
06:22When school starts and you're in the city,
06:24if your allowance isn't enough,
06:26just tell Dad.
06:27Mr. Wilson,
06:28I don't need that much.
06:29I'll budget carefully.
06:30Deborah sighed.
06:31This girl.
06:32Just too considerate for her own good.
06:34I stared down at my rice.
06:35Remembering freshman year,
06:37my dad had taped my awards up
06:38in the most visible spot in the living room,
06:40telling everyone who visited.
06:42My daughter.
06:43Straight A's.
06:44Then Amanda transferred in.
06:45She failed her first monthly exam.
06:47Amanda's already so sensitive,
06:49and Summer is so outstanding.
06:51Two girls under the same roof.
06:53Comparisons are inevitable.
06:54Day one.
06:55My dad took my awards down.
06:56Day two.
06:57Summer,
06:57it's good you do well,
06:58but don't always bring it up.
07:00And don't put too much pressure on your sister.
07:03I hadn't said a single word.
07:04Getting good grades had become a sin.
07:08My dad suddenly called my name.
07:10I looked up.
07:12Summer.
07:13Thinking maybe,
07:13finally,
07:14he would ask one thing about the West Coast,
07:16he frowned.
07:17Amanda was talking to you,
07:18didn't you hear?
07:19Amanda quickly waved her hand.
07:21Summer was probably just thinking about the West Coast.
07:25She didn't mean to ignore me.
07:27My dad's face was cold.
07:29What's there to think about?
07:31You think you're so capable?
07:33You filled out your own application.
07:34You go to your own school.
07:36Don't act like the whole family owes you something.
07:39I had filled out the West Coast school myself.
07:41Ethan was right next to me when I did it.
07:43He filled out the same one,
07:45turned his screen toward me,
07:46and said,
07:47Summer,
07:47don't be scared.
07:49The three of us will look out for each other.
07:51I found out later.
07:52That was a screenshot taken before he submitted.
07:55When he submitted,
07:56he'd changed it back to the university near home.
07:58Ethan was also at dinner tonight.
08:00Summer.
08:01His voice was very soft.
08:05I'll help you look over the West Coast paperwork again.
08:08Look over what?
08:09I asked.
08:10He fell silent.
08:11Amanda looked down.
08:13Summer,
08:14I'm sorry.
08:15It's all because of me.
08:17I really can't handle the climate there,
08:19and I'm scared I won't be able to do anything right on my own.
08:22I looked at her.
08:23She had never filled out the West Coast school from the start.
08:26Amanda,
08:26it's not your fault.
08:28But Summer going alone,
08:29it makes me really sad too.
08:31Her eyes reddened.
08:32Ethan,
08:32maybe you should still go with Summer.
08:33I'll be fine in the city by myself.
08:36Absolutely not.
08:37Deborah also hurriedly spoke up.
08:38Amanda's health is fragile.
08:39I'm not comfortable with her in the city alone,
08:42let alone the West Coast.
08:43Ethan,
08:43it's Amanda's first time living in a dorm.
08:45Your schools are close.
08:47Help her out with dorm stuff.
08:48Keep an eye on her.
08:49Ethan said nothing.
08:49He just accepted it.
08:52I thought about my last birthday.
08:54I said the family was too busy.
08:55They'd make it up on the weekend.
08:57Amanda said she'd accidentally picked up my cake order.
08:59A strawberry cake with her name on it now.
09:01I sat alone in my unlit room.
09:03Ethan climbed through the window and brought me a tiny cream cake.
09:06Brawled on it.
09:07Crooked letters.
09:08He said,
09:09It's okay if everyone else forgot.
09:11I remembered.
09:12I cried so hard.
09:13He wiped my tears and said,
09:16Summer,
09:16from now on,
09:17I'll always stand behind you.
09:18I guess words like always really can't be trusted.
09:24After dinner,
09:25Ethan followed me to the balcony.
09:28Summer,
09:28did you hear something?
09:29I leaned against the doorframe,
09:30not looking at him.
09:31What do you think?
09:34I didn't mean to lie to you.
09:36Then what were you doing?
09:38He paused a long time.
09:41I just,
09:42Amanda needs someone to look after her more than you do.
09:45I lifted my head.
09:47So?
09:49So I'm staying in the city with her.
09:51That doesn't mean I don't want you.
09:54You go to the West Coast first.
09:55When you graduate,
09:56we'll still...
09:58Still get married?
09:59I finished for him.
10:01Ethan,
10:01what do you think my four years of university are?
10:04I didn't.
10:05You did.
10:05I looked at him,
10:06word by word.
10:07You thought I would just wait for you?
10:09Wait for you to finish taking care of Amanda?
10:11Wait for you to finally remember
10:12that you still had a Summer standing behind you?
10:14From outside the balcony,
10:15Debra's voice suddenly rang out.
10:17Amanda,
10:17what are you doing standing there?
10:19You're so pale.
10:20Are you feeling unwell again?
10:21Amanda stood in the doorway.
10:22Tears instantly streamed down her face.
10:25Summer,
10:25I never meant to steal Ethan away.
10:27Ethan immediately spun around.
10:30Amanda,
10:30don't cry.
10:31Amanda had just lifted a hand to wipe her tears.
10:33When Debra already stepped in front of her,
10:35shielding her,
10:36I hadn't done anything.
10:37She cried,
10:37and I became the one who made her cry.
10:39Debra wrapped an arm around her.
10:41Summer,
10:41Amanda already feels terrible enough.
10:43Why do you have to push her like this?
10:44My dad didn't ask what happened.
10:46He just asked me,
10:47Summer,
10:47what exactly do you want?
10:48The people who lied to me were them.
10:50Yet somehow,
10:51I was the one who'd done wrong,
10:53but I didn't want to ask anymore.
10:54In this house,
10:55no one was going to give me answers anyway.
10:57I turned and walked back to my room.
10:58As I closed the door,
11:00Ethan called after me.
11:01Summer,
11:01wait for me to come back.
11:02I'll explain everything properly.
11:04I didn't look back.
11:04I didn't need explanations anymore.
11:07The next morning,
11:08my dad knocked on my door.
11:09I was stuffing the last few books into my suitcase.
11:12He looked at the suitcase and frowned.
11:16What are you doing?
11:17Early check-in.
11:18My dad let out a scoff.
11:20Early check-in?
11:21Had a meltdown yesterday,
11:22and now you're running away from home?
11:26It's not running away.
11:27The school notified me.
11:28My dad walked in
11:29and nudged the edge of the suitcase with his foot.
11:31Don't use the school to pressure me.
11:33You're the older sister.
11:34Amanda and Noah are younger.
11:36Give in to them.
11:37What's the big deal
11:37about giving way for them a little?
11:39I looked up at him.
11:40Amanda's only two months younger than me.
11:42So what?
11:43She grew up struggling with her mom.
11:44She's more sensitive than you.
11:48And me?
11:49You've had me raising you since you were little.
11:51You've never lagged food or clothing.
11:53What do you have to complain about?
11:54I didn't say anything more,
11:55but my dad seemed provoked by my silence.
11:57Stop always putting on this victim act.
11:58Your mom passed away early.
12:00I raised you with my own two hands,
12:02and I gave you a whole family.
12:03What more could you possibly be unsatisfied with?
12:08A whole family?
12:09I finally spoke.
12:11Dad, do you really feel like this place is my home?
12:14What's that supposed to mean?
12:15My voice was very soft.
12:17If this counts as a home,
12:18then I guess I really don't know how to be satisfied.
12:20My dad raised his hand,
12:21about to strike me.
12:24Ethan stepped between me and my dad.
12:25Uncle Wilson.
12:28If she wants to check in early,
12:29that's her choice.
12:30Don't push her.
12:32In that instant,
12:33it was like seeing the Ethan from when we were little.
12:36The one who would stand in front of me
12:37and say no one was allowed to bully me.
12:39But the next second,
12:40Amanda suddenly cried out from the living room.
12:42Debra's panicked voice followed.
12:44Amanda can't breathe!
12:45Her anxiety is acting up again!
12:46Ethan's face changed completely.
12:48He rushed out.
12:49Amanda was curled up on the couch,
12:51face pale,
12:52fingers trembling.
12:52The moment she saw Ethan,
12:54she grabbed his sleeve.
12:55Ethan, am I so useless?
12:56Am I causing trouble for everyone again?
12:59Don't think like that.
13:00Ethan crouched down,
13:01his voice gentle.
13:03I'll take you to the hospital.
13:04He picked her up and looked back at me.
13:05That glance held guilt,
13:06but also an assumption he didn't even notice he was making.
13:09Summer, wait for me to come back and we'll talk.
13:10He said.
13:11The door closed.
13:11I stood there without moving for a long time.
13:13My dad said coldly,
13:15You see?
13:16That's how Amanda is.
13:17What do you still have to hold against her?
13:18I lowered my head and zipped up my suitcase.
13:21So this was what he meant.
13:22My standing behind me.
13:23I only got my turn when Amanda didn't need him.
13:25From the bottom drawer of my desk,
13:27I pulled out a chipped paint-worn biscuit tin.
13:29The time capsule Ethan and I buried when we were ten.
13:31My dad found us.
13:33Laughed and went to find the tin himself to seal it up for us.
13:35Inside were little stick figures I'd drawn.
13:37Ethan's broken toy gun.
13:38And a slip of paper on the yellowed paper.
13:40In Ethan's crooked handwriting.
13:42Ethan will always protect Summer.
13:43Can't let anyone bully her.
13:44I stared at it for a long time.
13:46Then I put the note back and wrote a new line underneath.
13:48You don't need to protect me anymore.
13:50I'll walk forward on my own.
13:52I finished writing.
13:53Closed the tin.
13:54Placed it in my suitcase next to the confirmation form.
13:56My phone buzzed with a message.
13:58Summer, your early check-in eligibility has been confirmed.
14:00Please arrive at the designated airport assembly point before 7 a.m. tomorrow.
14:05I replied, received.
14:07This time, no one was making decisions for me.
14:10The day I left, I didn't wake anyone up.
14:12I was 18 now.
14:13The last line of the confirmation form no longer required a guardian signature.
14:18As my suitcase rolled across the living room floor, I paused.
14:21The wall that used to be covered with my awards was now filled with Noah's crooked sons and cars.
14:26The straight A certificate that had been in the very center had been ripped down, leaving only a faint yellow
14:31stain from the tape.
14:32I remembered what my dad said when he held me up to tape that certificate to the wall.
14:37Summer, daddy's saving the center spot for you.
14:39But the center spot could be replaced that easily.
14:43I pulled my suitcase to Ethan's house.
14:46I dropped the time capsule into his mailbox and stuck a sticky note on it, returned to its owner.
14:51Before heading to the airport assembly point, I opened my phone one last time.
14:54In the family group chat, Noah had sent a voice message.
14:57Amanda, Summer, Ethan, we can all play together every day from now on.
15:01I left the family group chat.
15:02I blocked their numbers, one by one.
15:05The assembly teacher approached.
15:07During the training period, personal communication devices will be held in custody.
15:10Project location, task details, and personnel lists are not to be disclosed externally.
15:14I nodded and placed my phone into the sealed bag.
15:16The wind over the Pacific was that strong.
15:19Maybe it really could blow me so far from these people that we'd never see each other again.
15:23By the time Ethan got back from the hospital, it was already daylight.
15:26Amanda was fine, nothing serious.
15:28Just too much emotional fluctuation.
15:30The whole drive back.
15:31My calm eyes from the day before kept flickering through his mind,
15:35unsettling him, making his heart race.
15:37He pushed open my door.
15:39The room was already half empty.
15:40Clothes from the closet.
15:42Books from the desk.
15:43Even that little nightlight I'd used for years.
15:45All gone.
15:46My dad stood at the doorway, frowning impatiently.
15:49What's she throwing a fit about now?
15:50She's going off to the West Coast for university.
15:52Why's she acting like she's cutting all ties?
15:54A sudden heaviness sank in Ethan's chest.
15:56Uncle Wilson, did she leave early?
15:58Let her leave.
15:59My dad's face was cold.
16:00She's a grown adult.
16:01She's not going to get lost.
16:03Ethan pulled out his phone and called my number.
16:05Couldn't connect.
16:06He sent a message.
16:08A red exclamation mark popped up.
16:11Ethan's fingers froze.
16:15The next door neighbor came over holding the tin.
16:18Ethan, Summer put this in your mailbox.
16:20Said it was for you.
16:21Ethan saw the chipped biscuit tin and his breath caught.
16:24The time capsule.
16:25My dad's phone suddenly rang.
16:26It was the school calling.
16:28Hello?
16:28Hello, this is regarding Summer.
16:30She has completed her early check-in for the specialized training program
16:33and her files have been transferred.
16:34Subsequent information cannot be disclosed due to confidality requirements.
16:37Where did she go?
16:38When is she coming back?
16:40The person on the other end only repeated,
16:41Apologies.
16:42The relevant information cannot be disclosed.
16:45Ethan gripped the tin tightly.
16:48He pried the lid open just a crack.
16:50At the very bottom, pressed beneath everything else,
16:52was a fresh piece of paper.
16:53The handwriting was nothing like the note from ten years ago.
16:56Just one line.
16:57You don't need to protect me anymore.
16:59I'll walk forward on my own.
17:01Ethan's hands wouldn't stop shaking.
17:03Inside the tin were the broken toy gun.
17:05Two crayon drawings, faded glass marbles, and that yellowed piece of paper.
17:09Ethan will always protect Summer.
17:11Can't let anyone bully her.
17:12He stared at those words, and memories flooded back.
17:15Grabbing Summer's backpack, chasing off the kids who taunted her,
17:18climbing through her window with a lopsided birthday cake.
17:20He had once believed he was the most important person in her world.
17:23But then, Amanda arrived.
17:24She was always quietly trailing behind them,
17:26too afraid to hold an umbrella over herself,
17:28hiding to cry after a bad test.
17:30He just thought Amanda was like Summer had been after their mom died,
17:33too afraid to cry out loud.
17:34So he looked after her a little more.
17:36Later, he started asking Amanda first if she was cold,
17:38remembered what she was afraid of first,
17:40when they both went quiet.
17:41He always assumed Summer could handle things on her own.
17:44My dad sat on the couch, faced dark with anger.
17:46She did this on purpose to get a reaction out of us.
17:50What confidential training, what cannot be disclosed,
17:53just trying to scare people.
17:54Summer's just being impulsive.
17:56She'll come back when she's had a taste of hardship.
17:58Ethan looked up, his voice flat.
18:00She didn't leave to suffer.
18:02And she didn't check in early to scare you all.
18:05My dad frowned.
18:06Ethan, what are you saying?
18:07Ethan didn't answer.
18:09He just remembered my words.
18:10What do you think my four years of university are?
18:13A future he thought he could just pick up again once Amanda no longer needed him.
18:16Something he thought he could smooth over with an...
18:18I'll explain what gave him the right to assume I would always be waiting in the same place for him.
18:23Over the next few days, Ethan searched for me everywhere.
18:25Teachers, classmates, the admissions office, even the airport assembly roster.
18:29The answer was always the same.
18:31The last time he called the admissions office, the teacher's tone was very stern.
18:35Summer has checked in safely.
18:36Her specific location cannot be disclosed.
18:39Please respect her personal choice.
18:40Ethan, Summer is over 18 and has explicitly refused to disclose her whereabouts to unauthorized contacts.
18:47Please stop making further inquiries.
18:49After he hung up, Ethan held his phone, motionless for a long time.
18:53It was the first time he realized the one truly left behind was him.
18:56And on my end, the first week after arriving on the West Coast was filled with paperwork,
19:00training, and getting familiar with courses every day.
19:03No one knew my past.
19:04No one asked why I checked in early.
19:06The teacher only asked me once during the final conversation.
19:08Summer, choosing this specialized track means a lot of hard work ahead.
19:12Are you sure?
19:13I nodded.
19:14I'm sure.
19:14Do you have your family's support?
19:16I was silent for a moment.
19:18Then I smiled a little.
19:19They don't matter.
19:20The teacher paused.
19:21I used to think life had to come with my dad's approval, with Ethan by my side, with blessings
19:25from my family.
19:26Turns out I could walk forward without any of that.
19:28My father went to my school to find the teacher.
19:30The teacher took a photocopy out of a drawer.
19:32Summer left this for me.
19:34She said if you really came asking why she left, I should show you the non-confidential part.
19:38The copied pages held three years of my grades, interview records, and a personal statement.
19:43When my dad reached the last page, his fingers stopped, written there.
19:46I want to go someplace farther away and see if I can become just myself, without needing anyone.
19:51My dad stared at that paragraph for a very long time.
19:54The teacher sighed.
19:55Summer has been preparing for this program since senior year.
19:57Going to the West Coast wasn't out of spite.
19:59She had her own reasons.
20:00Then why did she leave early?
20:02My dad's voice came out hoarse.
20:03The teacher was silent for a moment.
20:05That question, you should be asking yourself.
20:07That day, after going home, my dad stood at the doorway of Summer's empty room until
20:11the sky turned completely dark.
20:12Noah ran over, clutching his toy car.
20:14Daddy, when's Summer coming back?
20:16My dad didn't answer.
20:17Does she not like me?
20:18My dad's throat tightened.
20:19Summer's your big sister.
20:21Next time you see her, you call her big sister.
20:23Then next time I see her, I'll call her big sister.
20:26My dad's eyes reddened instantly.
20:28On the seventh day after I left, Ethan passed a dessert shop.
20:32In the display window was a strawberry cream cake.
20:34He stood outside the shop for a long time before it belatedly hit him.
20:37The day I left was my 18th birthday.
20:39That day, he was at the hospital with Amanda.
20:41His mind had been full of Amanda's anxiety.
20:43He hadn't even remembered.
20:44That day was my birthday.
20:45Last year on my birthday, the family forgot too.
20:47He had climbed through the window and brought a tiny strawberry cake with Summer written
20:51on it.
20:51I asked him through tears how he remembered.
20:53He said, it's okay if everyone else forgot.
20:55I remembered.
20:55Ethan bought a cake exactly like last year's.
20:58The shop assistant asked if he wanted a name written on it.
21:00He was silent for a long time, then said quietly,
21:02Right, Summer.
21:03That evening, he took the cake to my house.
21:05Ethan didn't ring the doorbell.
21:06He set the cake down on the front steps and stared at the door, as if, as long as he
21:10waited
21:10long enough, I would come out.
21:11I would frown and ask, Ethan, what are you doing sitting out here?
21:14And he would hand me the cake and say happy birthday.
21:16Maybe I'd be angry.
21:17Maybe I'd ignore him.
21:18But at least, I would still be standing in front of him.
21:21The sky darkened bit by bit.
21:23The edges of the cream slowly melted.
21:25Even the strawberries lost their shine.
21:27When my dad came back, he saw Ethan sitting on the steps, the now misshapen cake box at
21:32his feet.
21:33What are you still waiting for?
21:34Ethan looked up.
21:35Before, when I bought her cake, she'd be so happy.
21:37My dad didn't speak.
21:39Ethan looked at the cake, his voice hoarse.
21:41It just hit me now.
21:42It was never the cake that made her happy.
21:44It was because back then, she was still in my heart.
21:46My dad stood there and in the end said nothing.
21:49The next day, my room was half empty, but a new white storage bin had appeared next to
21:55the desk.
21:56Debra had it delivered.
21:57Since I wouldn't be back much, Amanda could use it first.
21:59My dad walked over and pulled open a drawer.
22:01Inside were Amanda's notes, skincare products, and a university checklist.
22:06He looked at it for a moment, then pushed the drawer shut.
22:09Move all this stuff out.
22:11Debra stood at the door, momentarily stunned.
22:13Honey, it's just a few things.
22:15Summer's gone, the room's just sitting empty.
22:18I said move it out.
22:20Debra's expression soured.
22:22What do you mean by this?
22:24For Summer's sake, you can't even tolerate Amanda anymore?
22:27My dad didn't look at her.
22:28His hand rested on the edge of the desk, that desk he'd built for me with his own hands.
22:33He looked at the patch of yellowed adhesive on the wall, the spot where my straight-A
22:36certificate used to hang.
22:38No one is allowed to touch anything in this room from now on.
22:42Amanda stood at the doorway and said quietly,
22:45I'll pack it up myself.
22:46My dad looked up at her.
22:48Make it clean.
22:52That night, Amanda packed the contents of the storage bin into a cardboard box by herself.
22:57Books, makeup, clothes.
22:59At the very end, she saw an old fountain pen of mine still pressed into the desk drawer.
23:03She reached out and touched it, then quickly pulled her hand back.
23:07When she carried the box back to her room, Debra was already sitting on the edge of the bed,
23:11waiting.
23:11Why are you moving it?
23:13Your dad's just feeling guilty right now.
23:15Can Summer really just never come back for the rest of her life?
23:18The cardboard box in Amanda's hand spilled onto the floor with a heavy thud.
23:22She stared down at the book for a long time, not moving.
23:26Debra bent down and picked it up for her.
23:28Don't let your dad scare you.
23:30He feels like he owes Summer right now.
23:32He'll get over it.
23:33Amanda didn't take it.
23:34Debra placed the book back in the box, her tone softening.
23:37You know Summer's personality.
23:39She's stubborn.
23:40She talks big.
23:41But once she hits some real hardship at university, she'll come around.
23:45Amanda suddenly lifted her head.
23:46She's not coming back.
23:48Debra froze.
23:49How do you know?
23:51She blocked all of us.
23:52Amanda's voice was very quiet.
23:54Debra was silent for a moment, her face darkening.
23:56So what if she blocked us?
23:57She's been terrified of being unwanted since she was a kid.
24:00She's just angry right now.
24:02Once the anger fades, she'll always come back.
24:05Amanda looked at her, then spoke, her voice flat, as if just stating facts.
24:10Don't go head-to-head with her.
24:12The more you show weakness, the more dad protects you.
24:15Ethan's soft-hearted.
24:16If you're upset, just say so.
24:18Isn't that what you taught me?
24:24What did I teach you?
24:25I just told you not to let yourself be pushed around.
24:27You told me to tell Ethan I couldn't sleep,
24:29to tell him I was scared of going to the West Coast.
24:31You said as long as I said I was struggling, he wouldn't leave me behind.
24:33You said Summer can take it better than me.
24:35She won't really stay mad for long.
24:37Amanda, watch your words.
24:38I just told you to say what was in your heart.
24:39But I never even applied to the West Coast.
24:41Amanda cut her off.
24:42She clenched her fingers.
24:44I never intended to go from the very beginning.
24:45I knew Ethan would change his application, would stay in the city.
24:48When he asked me if I was scared, I could have told him I hadn't even applied there.
24:52But I didn't.
24:53Debra's face, steadily drained of color.
24:56I knew that the moment I cried, Dad would immediately think Summer was bullying me.
25:00I knew that the moment I said I felt bad, Ethan would come comfort me first.
25:03I knew.
25:04But I thought, at worst, she'd just ignore me for a few days.
25:07She paused for a long time.
25:08I never imagined she would actually give up on this whole family.
25:12A voice suddenly came from outside the door.
25:15You two, keep talking.
25:16Amanda and Debra both froze.
25:19My dad stood in the doorway, holding a glass of milk that had long gone cold.
25:23He had come upstairs to call Amanda for dinner.
25:25The door wasn't shut tight.
25:26He had heard every word clearly.
25:27Debra's face shifted.
25:29Honey, let me explain.
25:30I wasn't trying to make Summer suffer.
25:32I just wanted Amanda to have a slightly better life.
25:35She went through so much hardship with me.
25:37As her mother, I have to think a little more for her.
25:40My dad stood there, not speaking for a very long time.
25:43He lifted his head, his eyes bloodshot.
25:45You were looking out for your own daughter.
25:47That's not wrong.
25:48Debra froze.
25:49The wrong one is me.
25:50You told Amanda to act weak.
25:52That was your wrong.
25:53Amanda knew perfectly well and still went along with it.
25:56That was her wrong.
25:57But every single time Summer was wrongfully blamed, every single time she stood off to
26:04the side and said nothing, every single time I told her to give way to Amanda, give way
26:11to Noah, his voice grew hoarse.
26:13I could have asked her even once.
26:15I could have chosen not to take sides, but I didn't.
26:20Honey!
26:21Stop saying you're the one who drove her away.
26:24It wasn't just you.
26:26It was every single one of us.
26:29Thinking it was easiest to just let her swallow it down.
26:32Amanda's tears fell even harder.
26:34She wanted to say sorry, but Summer wasn't here anymore.
26:36Tomorrow, take everything you moved into Summer's room and move it back out.
26:41Moving it out isn't about waiting for her to come back.
26:44She's not here.
26:45But no one should be making decisions for her anymore either.
26:48After that day, Deborah took Noah and went back to her parents' place.
26:51My dad didn't stop her.
26:52Ethan came by once.
26:53He just stood outside Summer's door for a while, gripping the time capsule tightly.
26:57Another month passed, following registration protocols.
27:00The training center sent a periodic safety confirmation to Summer's emergency contact.
27:05My dad's phone buzzed.
27:06Just one line.
27:07I'm fine.
27:07No need to find me.
27:08My dad stared at that line for a long time.
27:10He tapped open the text field and typed,
27:12Summer.
27:13Dad knows he was wrong.
27:14Then he deleted it.
27:15Character by character.
27:16Three years later, the first phase of the project ended.
27:18I got seven days of leave.
27:20The day I came back into the city happened to be my mom's death anniversary.
27:23Over these three years, I'd only sent a few safety confirmations to my emergency contact
27:26as required.
27:27Say, do not worry.
27:28Do not look for me.
27:30I hadn't told anyone I was coming back.
27:31The wind at the cemetery entrance was a lot smaller than the west coasts.
27:34But when it blew over me, there was still a chill.
27:37My dad stood at the bottom of the steps, holding a bouquet of white roses.
27:39He had grown thinner.
27:40His temple's now white.
27:42When he saw me, he just froze.
27:43After a long time, he called out, low and rough.
27:47Summer, today is your mom's anniversary.
27:49I come every year.
27:51Didn't think I'd run into you today.
27:53I didn't answer.
27:54My dad looked down, watching the dry leaves rustle.
27:58These three years, I've thought about a lot of things.
28:01The day you left, you asked me if this place was your home.
28:04I was so angry back then.
28:06I thought you were being ungrateful.
28:07Thought, how could you ask me that after I raised you?
28:10I looked up at him.
28:11My dad's eyes reddened, but he didn't rush to explain like he used to.
28:14My dad's grip on the flower wrapping creased the paper.
28:17Summer, dad was wrong.
28:18I always thought, you're my daughter.
28:20You wouldn't really leave me.
28:21His voice grew quieter and quieter.
28:23I used to think that when he finally apologized, I would ask him why he stopped liking me later.
28:26Why he pushed me behind everyone else.
28:28But now that the day was actually here, my heart was surprisingly calm.
28:32Dad.
28:32He looked up.
28:33The way you treated me well before, that was real.
28:36His eyes reddened instantly.
28:37And the way you let me down later, that was real too.
28:40I don't hate you.
28:42But I can't go back to how things were either.
28:44His tears finally fell.
28:46He wiped them away.
28:47But I was no longer the Summer who would frantically guess what she'd done wrong just because he frowned.
28:51My dad lowered his head after a long, long time.
28:53I know.
28:54Dad wants you to know, from now on, wherever you are, dad won't make decisions for you anymore.
29:00I nodded.
29:01Okay.
29:01We went together to see my mom.
29:03In her photo, she was young and gentle, eyes curved and a smile.
29:07My dad stood beside me and didn't speak again.
29:09I laid down the flowers I'd brought.
29:11Coming out of the cemetery, Ethan was standing not far away.
29:14He was holding that chipped biscuit tin.
29:17He didn't come too close.
29:19Uncle Wilson didn't tell me you'd be back.
29:22It's your mom's anniversary today.
29:23I knew if you came back, you might come here.
29:26I was going to give this to Uncle Wilson.
29:28If you don't want to see me, I'll leave right now.
29:30I looked at him.
29:31Three years had passed.
29:33Long time no see.
29:34He was steadier now, but also more tired.
29:36Long time no see.
29:39This should be returned to you.
29:41I took the tin.
29:41The sticky note I had pasted on it back then had faded a little.
29:45Returned to its owner.
29:46Ethan stared at those words.
29:47Back then, I always told myself I was just looking out for Amanda a little more.
29:51I thought that once she was stable, once she wasn't scared anymore,
29:55I'd come back to you.
29:58That everything would still be in time.
30:00Summer, I'm not asking for your forgiveness.
30:03I just want to ask one thing.
30:04The wind blew over, rustling the leaves outside the cemetery gates.
30:07Can I try to win you back?
30:08I was silent for a long moment, then shook my head.
30:11Ethan.
30:13The color steadily drained from his face.
30:16Summer.
30:16I walked around him and kept going.
30:18I was already far away when I heard him call after me.
30:21I'm sorry.
30:21I paused, but didn't look back.
30:23His voice scattered in the wind.
30:24I said nothing.
30:26Where are you going?
30:28Airport.
30:31The day I went back to school, the project advisor picked me up at the airport.
30:36As we drove out of the city, the buildings outside the window grew fewer and farther between.
30:40Wind swept in from the distance, flattening the grass along the roadside in waves.
30:45How was the family?
30:47I thought about it.
30:48Not much has changed.
30:50So will you go back again?
30:54I looked out the window.
30:58I will.
30:59But not to return to the past.
31:01My advisor didn't ask any more questions.
31:03She took a document from the passenger seat and handed it to me.
31:07A few words were printed on the cover.
31:09Specialized training program.
31:11Phase two.
31:11Placement application.
31:12Staying will be harder.
31:14Field missions.
31:15Data sorting.
31:16Project reports.
31:17None of it's easier than regular coursework.
31:18And that blank space were four words.
31:20Stay.
31:21For training.
31:21Summer, you don't have to decide right away.
31:23Over these three years, I'd run field stations, organized sample data, revised reports in the lab in the early hours.
31:29The first time I saw my name on project materials.
31:33I want to stay.
31:34Are you sure?
31:35I'm sure.
31:37Alright.
31:38Then starting next week, you'll join the research group on site.
31:40This time, it wasn't carrying me away from anyone.
31:42It was just sending me to the place I wanted to be.
31:45After the application was approved, I moved into the project team's new dorms.
31:49Another year passed.
31:50On my birthday, the center's mailroom delivered a vetted letter.
31:53The sender was my dad.
31:54He said Noah could call me Big Sister.
31:56Now, a few days ago, after Noah finished drawing a family portrait, he hugged his notebook and asked him,
32:01Daddy, why doesn't Summer come back?
32:03My dad didn't lie to him.
32:04Because Summer has her own things to do.
32:06The letter also said,
32:07Amanda had gotten into graduate school on the East Coast.
32:09Before she left, she also left an apology letter.
32:11She took back every single thing she had ever moved into Summer's room.
32:15I didn't open it.
32:16At the end, my dad wrote,
32:17Summer, Dad won't force you to come home anymore.
32:21Do your own things well.
32:23Dad only wishes for you to be safe.
32:25I read it for a long time, then folded the letter and put it away in a drawer.
32:28Ethan didn't write.
32:29He only left one sentence on the system page that allowed holiday messages.
32:32Happy birthday.
32:33May you always move forward.
32:34I didn't reply.
32:35Noah's drawing was tucked inside my dad's letter.
32:37It showed a big red umbrella.
32:38Under the umbrella stood Dad, Deborah, Amanda, Noah, and Ethan,
32:41who he'd drawn very tall.
32:42Only in the very corner of the paper,
32:44there were a few crooked, wobbly letters.
32:46Summer, a child might think if you draw everyone under one umbrella,
32:49they're a family.
32:49In the end, the next morning,
32:51the researcher was heading to a field station
32:52to collect a new round of data.
32:53Summer, did you finish checking the equipment list?
32:56After finishing my degree,
32:57I planned to stay here,
32:58continuing research with a group.
32:59This place was no longer just an escape from the past.
33:01It was the path I would walk.
33:03All done, step by step.
33:04For years to come,
33:04I stood up and walked toward my waiting teammates.
33:06This time, I didn't look back.
33:08For years to come,
33:09Have a short ride.
33:09For years to come,
33:09DarkSeved Team,
33:10the next ship was heading down to the ship
33:10Many titanium connections were heading down 사과�
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