00:00So, let's start.
00:01Number nine.
00:02Owning a cat, especially a black one.
00:04Cats today are lazy internet royalty.
00:07Back in medieval Europe, they were furry little death sentences.
00:11During the 13th to 17th centuries, owning a cat, especially a black one,
00:16could get you accused of witchcraft and executed.
00:19Why? Because religious and secular authorities believed cats were familiars,
00:24aka magical spirit helpers given to witches by Satan himself,
00:28and, unlike helpful animals like oxen or hunting dogs, cats didn't do anything useful.
00:33They just stared, lurking, judging, you know, cat stuff.
00:38Pope Gregory IX even issued a papal bull in 1233, declaring black cats evil,
00:45literally calling them satanic vessels, which led to massive extermination campaigns across Europe.
00:51The irony? Killing cats made the rat population explode, which helped spread the Black Death.
00:57So, yes, a pope's cat phobia may have helped create the biggest plague in history.
01:02There are documented cases where women were dragged from their homes and executed solely
01:06because they kept a cat that liked to sit in windows and blink slowly.
01:11Some were accused of transforming into cats at night.
01:14Others were proven guilty because their cat hissed at a priest.
01:18And if your cat meowed during a thunderstorm, pack your bags for the afterlife,
01:22because that was Witchcraft 101.
01:24In short, the only difference between harmless pet and demonic accomplice was timing,
01:30or fur color, or whether you made eye contact with a bishop.
01:35Number eight. Being a vegetarian.
01:37Back in the Middle Ages, especially in Europe, meat wasn't just food. It was symbolic.
01:42Eating it showed you were part of God's natural order, enjoying the bounty he provided through the toil of farmers,
01:48butchers, and the occasional crusade.
01:50So, when someone refused to eat meat, it wasn't seen as a dietary choice.
01:54It was seen as a spiritual rebellion.
01:57Vegetarianism was often associated with heretics,
02:00especially certain fringe religious groups like the Cathars who believed that all flesh was impure
02:06and that the material world itself was evil.
02:10That might sound like your cousin who's deep into conspiracy documentaries,
02:13but to the Catholic Church, this was high treason against divine creation.
02:19Cathars and similar groups were hunted down, tortured, and burned,
02:23not because they were vegetarians per se,
02:25but because their meat-free beliefs symbolized their rejection of church authority.
02:31Even outside of these sects, someone who refused to eat meat during a feast
02:35or who insisted on a plant-based diet was often viewed with suspicion.
02:39In some regions, it was believed that avoiding meat could weaken your body and make you susceptible to demonic possession,
02:46or worse, that you were already possessed and trying to purify yourself for some dark ritual.
02:52So, if you rolled up to a medieval banquet and asked if they had a lentil stew instead of roast
02:59pork,
03:00you weren't seen as enlightened, you were seen as one goose leg away from heresy.
03:05Number seven, falling asleep in church.
03:07Imagine being so tired after farming, child-rearing, and surviving the plague
03:13that you nod off for a second during a five-hour sermon.
03:17And next thing you know, you're on trial for spiritual treason.
03:22In medieval and early modern Europe, falling asleep in church wasn't just embarrassing,
03:26it could get you fined, flogged, or in some extreme cases executed
03:32because it was seen as disrespecting God in his own house.
03:37If you couldn't stay awake while a priest shouted about eternal damnation,
03:42clearly your soul was already halfway to hell.
03:44It didn't help that most church services were held in cold, echoey stone buildings in Latin,
03:50with no seating or heating.
03:52You stood the entire time often after working all morning, but nodding off wasn't seen as exhaustion.
03:58It was proof that Satan had already started corrupting your soul.
04:02Some records from 16th century England describe towns where dozing in church was punished by stocks,
04:08public beatings, or being dragged into the square by your ears.
04:12In Puritan New England, it could escalate.
04:14If you were a repeat offender or known for slouching into darkness,
04:18your name might be handed to the local magistrate.
04:21From there, witch trial territory?
04:23Today, falling asleep in church just earns you a sharp elbow from grandma.
04:27Back then, it could earn you a grave.
04:30Number six, reading too much.
04:32Today, reading makes you look smart.
04:35Back in the 14th century, it made you look suspicious, like burn you at the stake suspicious.
04:40If you weren't a priest, a noble, or someone who'd spent years in a monastery,
04:45just owning a book could put a giant, execution-shaped target on your back.
04:49Books were rare, handwritten, and expensive.
04:52They weren't mass-market thrillers or cozy fantasy novels.
04:56They were sacred objects tightly controlled by the church and the upper class.
05:00So if a random farmer or blacksmith was seen reading, alarm bells went off.
05:04People feared that without proper spiritual supervision, reading could corrupt your soul.
05:10Or worse, inspire independent thought.
05:13And nothing scared authority more than someone thinking for themselves.
05:17Things got especially risky if you were reading in a vernacular language instead of Latin.
05:22That's how you cross the line from nerdy to heretic.
05:26A peasant caught with a translated bible was seen as trying to interpret God's word without permission.
05:32That was basically theological treason.
05:34In places like England and France, this got people tortured, tried, and burned alive.
05:40All because they wanted to read in their mother tongue.
05:42So yeah, centuries before banned books were cool, being a bookworm could get you executed for intellectual curiosity.
05:50Number five.
05:51Being the first to wake up.
05:53Nowadays, early risers get praised in TED Talks and motivational podcasts.
05:57But in certain medieval towns, waking up too early was basically a red flag for dark magic.
06:03Back then, being seen up and about before sunrise wasn't seen as productive.
06:08It was seen as suspiciously unnatural, especially if you weren't a monk.
06:12You see, the hours before dawn were believed to belong to witches, spirits, and other nocturnal nasties.
06:20So, if you were strolling through town in the eerie pre-dawn fog, people assumed you were either summoning demons
06:28or one of them.
06:30There's an actual case in Bohemia where a baker, just doing his job prepping loaves before sunrise, got accused of
06:37witchcraft.
06:38Locals thought the bread was cursed, and because bad luck coincidentally followed his deliveries that week, that was all the
06:46evidence they needed.
06:47The guy ended up executed, all for being too enthusiastic about carbs.
06:52So, next time someone brags about their 4am hustle routine, just remind them.
06:57In medieval Europe, that was a one-way ticket to the gallows.
07:00Number four.
07:01Carrying a spoon.
07:03You're walking around with a spoon in your pocket.
07:05Maybe it's silver, maybe it's carved bone, maybe you just forgot to put it down after lunch.
07:10And the next thing you know, you're being dragged to trial for witchcraft.
07:14In parts of medieval Europe, especially during peak witch hysteria, even the most harmless objects were seen as potential tools
07:22of the occult.
07:23Spoons, for some reason, were especially suspicious.
07:25If they were ornate, oddly shaped, or made of uncommon materials, they were thought to be used for stirring potions,
07:33drawing circles, or channeling spells.
07:35There's an actual case from 17th century Poland, where a woman was executed simply because she kept a silver spoon
07:42in her shoe.
07:43Her reason? It was for good luck.
07:44But, in an era when superstition ruled, that was basically a confession.
07:49Authorities claimed it was a witch's charm, and that was all they needed to haul her off to trial.
07:54Even in other parts of Europe, spoons, found under beds, inside clothes, or hidden in walls, were treated like magical
08:02contraband.
08:03Forget a wand. This was the original suspicious object.
08:06So yeah, in the middle ages, you didn't need a broomstick or a pointy hat to be accused of sorcery.
08:11Sometimes, all it took was a spoon in the wrong place at the wrong time.
08:15Number three, baking bread that was too light.
08:18In medieval England, being a baker was basically a game of survival.
08:23Not from poverty or rats, but from the government.
08:26Under the assize of bread and ale, a law passed in 1266,
08:30every baker had to follow exact rules about how much their bread should weigh, depending on the price of wheat
08:35that day.
08:36Too heavy? You're wasting precious flour. Too light? Now you're defrauding the public.
08:42And that, my friend, was a crime worthy of public shaming.
08:48Local officials, hilariously known as ale-conners and bread-weyers, would literally show up at your stall,
08:55weigh your loaves, and if they found you skimping even a few ounces, you could be pilloried, flogged, or tossed
09:02in jail.
09:02Do it again, you might be dragged through the streets, or executed as a fraudster.
09:07The same punishment as a counterfeiter, because underweight bread was treated like economic sabotage.
09:14And the truly messed up part?
09:16Bread weight could be affected by weather, oven heat, or how finely the grain was milled.
09:21All things outside your control, but no one cared.
09:24Your innocent bagel shrinkage could get you hanged.
09:27Fast forward a few centuries, and we're suing sandwich shops for missing an inch on our subs.
09:32At least now, the bread won't kill your Yelp score and your body.
09:36Number two, wearing the wrong color.
09:39Today, you wear purple because it slaps.
09:42In the 1500s, wearing purple without royal blood was the fastest way to meet the executioner.
09:49Enter sumptuary laws.
09:51Medieval society's way of making sure you stayed in your lane visually.
09:55These laws dictated what colors, fabrics, and jewelry you were allowed to wear based on your social status.
10:02Commoners were restricted to dull browns and grays.
10:05Nobles got reds and blues.
10:07Royals? Purple, velvet, gold thread.
10:11Basically, the Coachella, VIP package of fashion.
10:14But if you, a mere cobbler's son, dared to wear a silk sash or scarlet hose, that wasn't style.
10:21That was treason.
10:22Wearing clothing above your station could be interpreted as trying to pass for a noble,
10:27which in many kingdoms was a criminal offense.
10:30You could be fined, imprisoned, or straight-up executed for impersonating someone with power,
10:35all because you rocked a look.
10:37There are actual recorded cases of tailors being whipped for selling above station cloth
10:42and servants being beheaded for borrowing their master's hat.
10:46The logic?
10:47If you dress better than your rank, you might be trying to infiltrate court, scheme your way into marriage,
10:52or worst of all, confuse people into thinking you mattered.
10:56Fashion policing used to come with actual gallows.
10:59The next time someone raises an eyebrow at your outfit, just remember,
11:03at least they're not legally allowed to kill you over it.
11:07Number one, talking to yourself in public.
11:10Modern people talk to themselves at the grocery store like,
11:12did I already grab oat milk? Medieval people saw this and assumed it was demon summoning.
11:17In early modern Europe, muttering to yourself was a red flag.
11:21Especially if you were a woman, old, lived alone, or just had a vibe that screamed,
11:26folklore-side character.
11:27Talking to yourself near animals or crops was instant witchcraft fuel.
11:32Your tomatoes didn't grow this year?
11:34Clearly the widow down the road cursed them when she was whispering nonsense near your fence.
11:38This wasn't just rural paranoia.
11:42Courts took this stuff seriously.
11:44One Scottish woman was executed because someone overheard her talking to her chickens
11:49and later blamed her when one of them laid a weird egg.
11:52Another was accused of blowing wind into the air and causing a hailstorm.
11:57No spell book, no potions, just talking and suddenly you're the reason a goat sneezed and crops failed.
12:03It wasn't just what you said, it was how you said it.
12:06Mumbled too softly?
12:07Secret incantation?
12:09Talk to no one in particular?
12:10Obvious demonic pact?
12:12Say, ugh, after stubbing your toe?
12:15Congratulations!
12:15Now the cows are infertile.
12:17In short, anxiety, boredom, or ADHD weren't personality quirks.
12:22They were execution level red flags.
12:24Thank you for watching and sticking till the end.
12:27We've got plenty more videos coming in the future.
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12:32See you in the next one.
