00:00Hi, welcome to Womanhood. I'm Jo. I'm Aparna. Get with the program.
00:10We're bringing you hot takes on how to be 21 years old or ruining your body at a young age.
00:18So as a 21 year old, there's many things you think won't ruin your body, but they truly will.
00:24Even if you might not know it at first. For example, lollipops.
00:27Nowadays, there's a drug called Molly. Stick it on top of a little stick.
00:33Molly pops. Someone hands you on at a concert. You didn't drink enough water.
00:37Now you're Molly Cyrus and your boobs are everywhere.
00:43Scared yet? Take this next one. Trains.
00:46Trains? You step in front of a train because you think you're invincible.
00:49Sounds fine. But then you get hit by a train.
00:52When I was 21, I started having unprotected sex because it didn't seem like a big deal.
00:58When I was 21, I did shots.
01:02Same thing. Unprotected shots.
01:04Same exact thing. So you're at a party.
01:07Yeah. You got a full bar. A lot of options.
01:10What are you going to drink?
01:11I myself care for something light but feminine. White wine.
01:18Now that's going to make your throat taste a little bit like salad dressing.
01:25I'll tell you what anything tastes like being thrown up. Hit one to me.
01:29I'd say a mimosa. That's a little bit of orange juice and champagne if you're new to the game.
01:36Coming back up. That's going to taste a little bit like a lemon poppy seed vinaigrette but gone bad.
01:43How about a white Russian?
01:45That's going to taste like your standard dish soap mixed with poop.
01:49Next.
01:49This one's a bit of a doozy. Red Bull. Followed by jello shot. Followed by coffee.
02:01Cotton candy in the sewer. That one's really... I know that one.
02:06There you go. Now an important lesson on hydration.
02:11It's important to stay hydrated.
02:14Let's say you find yourself at a party with a drunk guy.
02:17You're having a good time but then he swats at your bits.
02:20Mm-mm. You got to take control of that situation.
02:26Here's what you do first.
02:27He's pawing away at you thinking, oh everything's fine.
02:31You take out your spikes. Slash them across the face.
02:33If he continues, you say, keep going and you'll regret it.
02:38Step two. You make him regret it.
02:40You shove him into the sink.
02:41Say, you've been thinking dirty thoughts and it's time to get clean.
02:45His groin is completely soaked and still he has a hard on.
02:49You take out your razor sharp teeth that you've been sharpening all week.
02:52Bite into his fingers. Rip off the tips. Blood spurting everywhere.
02:57If anything's a turn on to a man, it ain't blood.
03:00I mean that'll send him home looking for cheesecake.
03:03Something to save the night.
03:05If you're lucky, he never goes to a party again.
03:08If you're smart, you'll never go to a party again.
03:12Hey! You ever had a one night stand?
03:15You should, should, should, you should try it. They're not bad.
03:17Though I recommend zero or two night stands.
03:20What do you like to do on a zero night stand?
03:22Hang out, at home, eat popcorn.
03:26Not get rejected.
03:28Ugh. A partner once had a 17 night stand. She won't stop bragging about it.
03:32Yeah, we got up to two weeks and we said, let's ride or die.
03:36Get over it.
03:37What's your favorite way to spend a two night stand?
03:40First night, you spend it getting to know each other.
03:43Second night, you spend it forgetting each other.
03:46You're in, you're out.
03:47What do you do when your roommate brings someone else home to do it with them?
03:52You blow all the fire alarms and you say, never forget.
03:57Thanks for watching, guys.
03:59If you learned anything, I think it's, you need to be careful.
04:04Godspeed.
