00:06Food is an essential part of our daily lives, but most people have a complicated relationship
00:11with what they eat and how they eat.
00:13So today we're talking to R29ers about how they've come to love their bodies and make
00:16their relationships with food work for them.
00:19But it's important to remember that their relationships with food are very unique, so
00:22keep that in mind while watching the video.
00:24Hey guys, I'm Joe, I have a love, love, sometimes hate relationship with food.
00:30Sometimes I overdo it, sometimes I eat too much.
00:32I have the biggest sweet tooth out of anybody you've probably ever met, but I've definitely
00:38struggled with food at the same time.
00:40I like to eat a lot.
00:42I like to eat a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot.
00:45The kind of foods I'm consuming aren't the healthiest, and then I guess the way I'm consuming
00:50them also aren't the healthiest.
00:52About a year ago, I was pretty unhappy with my life situation on the whole.
00:55One kind of unexpected turning point in the whole process was a stranger on the street
01:01said, get out of here, chubby little bitch boy, and I didn't really know where he wanted
01:05me to go, but the chubby part kind of stuck.
01:08My weird relationship with food really started through cheerleading.
01:12I would always have to wear a crop top uniform, and even though I was always working out and
01:16eating normal, come competition day when I had to put that uniform on, I would always
01:21eat the minimum because I didn't want to feel like I looked bad in any way, which food wouldn't
01:27have done.
01:28My relationship with food stems from my relationship with my dad.
01:33And one aspect of our relationship that I loved is we both like to eat, we both like
01:37to snack.
01:38And it got to a point where my mom, she said, okay, we're cutting out snacks, we're cutting
01:41out sweets.
01:42You guys like can't have them anymore.
01:43Did that stop us?
01:44No, we just had to like become sneaky with it.
01:47So we would be like, oh yeah, we're going to the gas station.
01:49But then, you know, of course, moms know all, so she finds out even again.
01:53So he kind of stopped the snacking as much as he used to, but me, it only got worse.
01:59After that I started to really take a good hard look at what I was eating and how much
02:03I was eating and when I was eating it.
02:04And lost 20 pounds since then, which is kind of cool, that's reassuring.
02:08I thought food was bad for my body, but actually it was nourishing for my body, it was good
02:13for my body and I needed it to survive and I should never have had that crazy idea.
02:19I'm kind of in a place where I'm trying to find the right balance.
02:23It's just kind of finding a healthier alternative so I can have my cake and eat it too, but be
02:28healthy about it.
02:29It's important to know that restricting our diets against what our body is telling us
02:32can be just as harmful as binging junk food.
02:35I did ballet and I would see ballerinas smoking cigarettes so they could suppress their appetite.
02:42Sadly the media did influence me pretty heavily growing up.
02:45You're cool if you eat this and move this way, you're not cool if you eat this way and look
02:49that way.
02:50There's so many things in life you can't control, so controlling my food is something
02:55that I still do.
02:56There's a really specific time where I would only eat a bowl of steamed broccoli for dinner.
03:02I felt like my body wouldn't allow me to be any skinnier and I still didn't feel good.
03:07I felt like this is like the lightest I'm going to be and I'm still not happy with it.
03:11Everyone has a different relationship with food, but when does your relationship become
03:15dangerous?
03:16When I was 12 I saw a young woman in a magazine and I really really really wanted to look
03:23like
03:23her.
03:24I picked it up and I was like mom I really want to look like this girl and she was
03:27like
03:27you'd have to lose a ton of weight to be able to look like that girl.
03:32I started looking at other magazines and this girl was telling a story about her sister who
03:36had died.
03:37She was bulimic and she was making herself throw up, but my brain didn't even care that
03:42her sister died.
03:42All my brain heard was like oh her sister lost a ton of weight.
03:46I could do that, like I could stop myself before I die.
03:50So from when I was 12 to when I was about 24 I've had this very intense up and down
03:57bulimia
03:59life and journey.
04:06That being said, these illnesses are treatable.
04:09So I'm 24, maybe 25 and I'm going to a figure drawing class.
04:14In comes this woman, the most beautiful plus size woman I've ever seen in my entire life.
04:20She came up to me and she was like hey you would be great at this and I was like
04:25no, no.
04:27I'm too ugly and gross and too fat to do this and she was like people love to draw curves
04:31and people love to see curves whether they're willing to admit it or not.
04:35But if you admit it to yourself then everything will be great.
04:38She understood where I was in the world.
04:40I remember being like what I am doing to myself is not a way to live, it is a way
04:45to die.
04:46And I am going to end up just like that girl in the magazine when I was 12.
04:49So I remember like the next day my goal is that I'm just going to eat something and I'm
04:55not going to throw up.
04:56I didn't have a choice at that point.
04:58I was going to die.
04:59We are here to tell you that you can overcome an eating disorder.
05:02At the end of the day we think that all body types are beautiful.
05:05Lean into it.
05:06Lean into your body and be really proud of it and confidence will take you further than
05:12any like single digit jean size you'll ever have.
05:17I think we need to encourage people and young girls to just love themselves and live their
05:22lives.
05:23If you're insecure about your body I would try and figure out where those insecurities stem
05:28from.
05:28You have to feel good about yourself.
05:30Food is not going to be the enemy for you.
05:33You can eat food, you can eat whatever you want.
05:36I think it's important to just look yourself in the eye every day and be happy with what
05:39you put in your body.
05:40Educate yourself in a smart way.
05:43Don't limit yourself.
05:44If you want to eat something amazing go for it.
05:46I have a s'mores cookie sitting at my desk right now.
05:48Moderation is the best way to go about living your healthy food lifestyle.
05:52As long as you're healthy and happy you're doing things right.
05:56If you or a loved one might be suffering from an eating disorder call the National Eating
06:00Disorders Association for confidential help at 1-800-931-2237.
06:07Thank you so much for watching and we'll see you next time.
06:09If you areukan.
06:14Bye-bye.
06:15You
