Tiny Tim LIVE 01/06/20

Tiny Tim's Adventures

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Transcript

00:02Hello! Yeah! Back live, baby!

00:08Um, so, Alicia, Emma, it's too late. What's too late?

00:15Um, Pico, come on, mate. Get a live, fam. I'm live!

00:21I know, Ronaldo is 11, nearly 14.

00:24It's older than 8 of I'm 3, nearly 6.

00:28Um, who else is on?

00:31Faze Coons! Hi, Tim. Hi, Faze.

00:35Um, Lewis Spate. Hi, Tim. Tim, you're the best. I watch all your videos.

00:39They're really funny. Boom. It's gone mad.

00:44Somebody just say, you're so hot. To me, I'm so hot.

00:49I am. I'm roasting. Proper melting. It's so warm, isn't it?

00:53Wow, it's hot. It's, like, proper hot. I'm roasting hot.

01:01So, who's seen me during my live stand-up set?

01:06Did that in Blackpool. It was a sold-out show.

01:10Did it in Blackpool. And it was me doing a little bit of...

01:15My voice in it as well. So, it was just me doing Commodore and...

01:21It was proper sold-out. It was, it was amazing.

01:26Um, and then it, I've got a few little clips, but some have got a little bit of swearing in.

01:31Um, and, and my mum, she won't be happy.

01:36Because she's a lazy pig.

01:38So, I just, I don't know whether to put other little clips on.

01:43So, you'll have to let me know if you want me to put the other little snippets on.

01:48But, yeah, I've got loads of, got loads of loving for it.

01:52So, thank you so much.

01:53Um, I'm just going to crack on today and do, do a few live calls.

01:59Because I'm proper hot.

02:02And it doesn't help being ginger.

02:04Because the sun don't like ginger people.

02:08Same as everyone.

02:10No one likes ginger people.

02:12So, I've got a fan on.

02:14I've got my number one fan.

02:16And it's nice. It's on my feet.

02:19And it's nice.

02:20It's nice.

02:24I'm trying to say hello to people.

02:26It's just going, um, no names that notice me.

02:33Dribbled.

02:34And someone just commented saying, fitter.

02:37Me.

02:39Oh, stop it.

02:41And someone said, I love gingers.

02:44Yeah, it's okay that you love gingers.

02:47But the sun doesn't.

02:49We don't even get a tan.

02:51We'll just go a little bit pink for a bit.

02:53And then we'll go back white.

02:55Um.

02:56But I just want to say, a mouthpiece.

02:59And hello to Lauren Tonkin.

03:01Thank you so much for your donation.

03:04And manlikejinker.

03:06Said, hi Tim, could you phone my brother?

03:09I'll DM Insta.

03:12Yeah.

03:13Okay.

03:14Yeah.

03:15Thanks, manlikejinker and Lauren Tonkin.

03:18Thank you so much for your doughnose.

03:21Thank you very much.

03:23So how's everyone doing in lockdown?

03:25It's nice that we've got a little bit of nice weather in it.

03:30So, I like ginger beer.

03:33My mum just loves beer.

03:34Don't matter what colour it is, ginger.

03:37Pale ale.

03:40My mum loves pale ale.

03:43Yeah.

03:44Um.

03:45So.

03:46I'm not comfortable.

03:49Right.

03:50So.

03:50Everyone doing alright during the lockdown?

03:53It's getting proper boring now, isn't it?

03:55Proper boring.

03:57And at least we'll have more groups of people around your back garden.

04:01But you've got to stay two metres apart.

04:04So, if your back garden's only two metres.

04:08Struggling.

04:09You can't have six people in your back garden then, can you?

04:12Um.

04:13But my back garden's my face.

04:16So.

04:17My mum's allowed in the back garden, but she won't even go out at all.

04:22Not because of the lockdown, because she's a proper lazy pig.

04:26She don't want to, she don't want to go out at all.

04:30Um.

04:31So, what else?

04:32Uncle Barry's still not been round.

04:34He's planting the attic and proper stinking.

04:36Smacked Steve's been coming round loads.

04:39Potted Pete.

04:41Potted Pete's been coming round.

04:44Obviously looking for the plants, but not allowed.

04:47He's not allowed in.

04:48Go and stay two metres.

04:49Go and stay two metres.

04:50Potted Pete.

04:51Back off, Potted Pete.

04:53Get away.

04:55Um.

04:55Cool kid Colin.

04:57He's been about.

04:59Um.

04:59He's got so much sherbet on him.

05:02But he says I'm not allowed.

05:03Sherbet.

05:04Good.

05:06Um.

05:06Someone just said, where am I from?

05:08I'm from at home.

05:10From at home.

05:11At my house.

05:13So, there.

05:14Um.

05:16I'm trying to read some of these, but it's.

05:19It's going to.

05:20Let me see if I can sell it out.

05:22So, it's not going too fast.

05:24Right.

05:25Not H.P.

05:26You are so funny.

05:28Ha ha ha ha.

05:30Um.

05:30Mike Tyson.

05:31Did you get your chicken nuggets yet?

05:34It's still not going, Mike Tyson.

05:37Knock you out, mate.

05:39Um.

05:40Whiskey William.

05:41Ha ha ha.

05:42That's another one.

05:43Um.

05:45What.

05:47Can't.

05:47What can't.

05:49Colin.

05:50Don't.

05:51Hi, Grace.

05:52There.

05:53I'm a woman.

05:54Potted Pete wrestling.

05:55No, they're not.

05:56Potted Pete's just falling asleep all the time.

05:59Um.

06:01Where else have we gone?

06:02Oh, it's gone again.

06:03It's gone again.

06:06Jimmy, man.

06:07Um.

06:08Sorry, mate.

06:09It's okay.

06:10I'm sorry.

06:11Um.

06:12Just going to crack on with some calls.

06:14See if I can get all the Potted Pete off.

06:17Smackin' Steve.

06:18Crackhead Colin.

06:19On you, man.

06:20Um.

06:22I'm going to ring Sian.

06:23Because Kevin has sent me Sian's number.

06:26So, we're going to try and get hold of Sian.

06:30Because Kevin's asked us to ring.

06:32Um.

06:34Did someone just say I'm Australian?

06:36I'm not Australian.

06:37I'm from Manchester.

06:39I'm from Manchester.

06:41Near the airport.

06:42Because the airport.

06:44Because the airport's Mathis.

06:44And everyone from Manchester is pretty much near the airport.

06:48Um.

06:49I love you so much.

06:50I love you too.

06:52Um.

06:53Right.

06:54I'm going to crack on.

06:54I'm going to try and ring.

06:56Um.

06:57Sian.

06:59Of Kevin.

07:03Welcome to the O2 messaging for.

07:05Sian, I'm going to speak to my trial again.

07:08Quick.

07:12Welcome to the O2.

07:13No.

07:14No.

07:14She might as well be on gift gaff.

07:19Um.

07:21Who else have we got?

07:25Um.

07:26I'm Ginger.

07:27I'm Ginger.

07:28Ring Chardonnay.

07:29I can't ring Chardonnay.

07:31I'm not even Chardonnays me.

07:34But I'm ringing Wenday.

07:35From Nicola.

07:40This is Wenday.

07:42Wenday.

07:45Love your vids.

07:47Hello.

07:48Hello.

07:50Hello.

07:51Hello.

07:51Is that Wenday?

07:54Hello.

07:55Hi, Wenday.

07:56Are you okay?

07:58I'm fine.

07:58How are you?

07:59I'm all right.

08:00Nicola has told me to ring you.

08:03I see.

08:04Yeah.

08:05Are you okay?

08:07I'm very well, thank you.

08:08How are you?

08:09I'm all right.

08:10How's your lockdown going?

08:12Oh, boring.

08:13Proper boring, innit?

08:15It is, yeah.

08:16But at least Uncle Barry's not allowed around.

08:18That's a bonus.

08:20Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

08:21He's always bothered.

08:22How are you?

08:23How are you?

08:25What?

08:27How are you coping with lockdown?

08:29I'm all right.

08:29It's not so much lockdown that's bugging me.

08:32It's the heat.

08:33I'm too hot.

08:34Oh, bless you.

08:35It's because I'm ginger and I'm melting.

08:41Oh, bless you.

08:42So, I feel like there's just going to be a ginger blob of mush on the floor where I've

08:49just melted.

08:51Like an ice cream.

08:52Yeah, like an ice cream.

08:55But I'm scared that my mum will just eat me if I'm a ginger blob.

09:00A ginger blob of ice cream.

09:03Yeah, because my mum will eat anything.

09:09So, what have you been doing during lockdown and just nothing?

09:13No, nothing.

09:16Just feeling with family as you do.

09:19Just, but keeping two metres, right?

09:22Yeah.

09:24Good.

09:25Good.

09:25Well, I just thought I'd ring and see how you're doing anyway.

09:29I'm very well, thank you.

09:31Good.

09:32Have you been watching my videos?

09:34I have, darling.

09:35Yeah, they're absolutely hilarious.

09:37Oh, good.

09:38I'm glad that you're watching.

09:40I'm glad you like them.

09:48What's your favourite one?

09:54The one with Nicky.

09:55I'm the absolute waiting.

09:57Asterix.

09:58Which one?

10:00You know, me friend Nicky, what did you mean?

10:03When?

10:04When or what?

10:05AK47.

10:07Oh, the AK47.

10:14Yeah, that's funny, isn't it?

10:17It is, yeah.

10:18Well, I'm glad you like the videos.

10:20Keep watching them and keep smiling.

10:22Stay safe, okay?

10:24And you, my darling.

10:25Okay.

10:26Well, I'll see you soon and I'll see you in a bit, okay?

10:30Bye.

10:31Love you.

10:32Love you.

10:33Love you.

10:33Bye.

10:35Bye.

10:37She's going to go and watch all my videos now.

10:40So, just want to say another Mathis thank you to Laura, who's thank you for your donation.

10:49It's towards sunscreen.

10:53It's just so that I can go and get some, some suntan lotion, Factor 50.

10:58Put it on me, it's all don't burn.

11:01Manlike Jinka, I messaged you on Insta.

11:04It's my YouTube name.

11:06Thank you very much, Manlike Jinka.

11:08Um, Marcus Herbert, can you please say happy birthday to my sister, Lily?

11:14She's eight today.

11:16Oh my God, Lily, you're eight.

11:18That's older than me because I'm three nearly six.

11:21And make sure you share your birthday cake.

11:24Don't eat here on yourself, otherwise you'll end up like my mum, a proper fat pig.

11:30You fat pig, Mum!

11:33Just shouting, my mum, she's in bed.

11:35Um, Michael Velocroden.

11:40Velocroden.

11:41Michael Velocroden.

11:42Michael V.

11:44I love you, Tim.

11:46You're too funny for YouTube.

11:47I know.

11:49I know, but I love YouTube.

11:51I love going live and speaking to all you people because you're all amazing.

11:56But thank you very much to everyone for the donations

12:00I'll definitely buy some sunscreen

12:02Definitely

12:03Definitely get some

12:05Some factor 50 on me

12:07I'll do that so I don't burn

12:09Because I get too hot

12:11Oh my god

12:15Nice, have you got a pool?

12:17Yeah, I've got a pool

12:19Yeah

12:19Can you get a smack of Steve?

12:21He's not here

12:23He's not here

12:26It's going too fast to read

12:27Can't read him

12:28It's going to be proper rapid

12:31Just going to crack on with another call though

12:34I'm going to ring Sean

12:37Because Ben sent in your number, Sean

12:41So I'm going to ring you

12:44So you better answer the phone, Sean

12:52Ben ought to swear

13:00This is the Vodafone

13:01This is the Vodafone Vodafone 4

13:05Oh, 7

13:07And that's it

13:09And that's it

13:10That's all and all

13:11Yeah, Sean

13:16How's Oscar?

13:18Oh, who's that?

13:23Oh, wait

13:23No name

13:25Tim, how's Oscar doing?

13:27Respond

13:27You always ignore me

13:29No name

13:29Tim, how's Oscar doing?

13:32Respond

13:32You always ignore me

13:33I'm not ignoring you now

13:35No name

13:37I don't know who you are

13:38Because you've got no name

13:39But Oscar's good

13:40Oscar's my dog

13:43He's a beast

13:45Did you see my TikTok?

13:47When I was trying to get the astronauts

13:49To try and find my real dad

13:52And then my mum was there

13:54But the one in my mummy was my dog

13:59That was funny

14:00That was funny, that TikTok

14:02Right

14:03Gonna ring somebody else

14:04And ring in

14:05Moona

14:06Again

14:07Try Moona

14:08Last week

14:09She didn't answer

14:10So Moona

14:11You've got to answer now

14:17Make sure you're subscribing as well

14:21Oh, hello

14:22Hello

14:24Oh, hello

14:25Hello, is that Moona?

14:27Yes, it is

14:28Hi, Moona

14:29It's me

14:30It's Tim

14:31Hi, Tim

14:32How are you?

14:33I'm okay

14:34Are you okay?

14:35I'm fine

14:36I'm pleased to hear from you

14:39Who did you think was on the phone?

14:41You put on a dead posh accent

14:44Did you think it was PPI or something?

14:49What have you been doing?

14:51What have I been doing?

14:52Not much

14:53What have you been doing?

14:55Mmm, a bit more than you

14:57I know

14:59How's your lockdown treating you?

15:01A bit boring, isn't it?

15:02Well, it's a bit boring now

15:04I've had enough

15:04I just want to go back to work

15:06Oh, you're not the only one

15:08I just want to go out and play in my sandpit

15:13Say hello to Paddington

15:14Hold on, Bella

15:18Oh, he's run off

15:19Who's Paddington?

15:21My dog

15:22Oh, your dog

15:23Yes

15:26Paddington could have spoke to my dog

15:28Because my mum speaks fluent dog

15:31Yeah

15:32I was going to say

15:34Say it may be beginning with B

15:35But better not

15:36Because

15:36I

15:36Yes

15:38Beginning with B

15:39I think I know what you mean

15:43She's proper butch

15:47She's like a German mud wrestler

15:52She's a proper beast

15:54He's back

15:55He's back

15:56Oh

15:57Paddington

15:59Paddington

16:00Paddington

16:14Paddington

16:20I just want to make sure that he's staying safe

16:24Yeah

16:24And you're not

16:25Make sure you're drinking plenty of water

16:27Because it's too hot

16:28I know

16:30I know

16:30I've been drinking

16:31I'm drinking water

16:32Just water

16:34Just water

16:35Well, yeah

16:35Water, wine

16:36Wine, water

16:37You know

16:37Do we sell that?

16:39Jesus

16:39Because he turned water into wine

16:41Didn't he?

16:43That's a skill my mum would love

16:47Yeah, me too

16:48Oh my god

16:50Wait, well

16:51I've got to go

16:51But make sure you're staying safe

16:53Okay?

16:55Yeah, you too

16:56Thanks for calling

16:57No problem

16:58You stay safe

16:59And I'll see you soon

17:00Okay?

17:01See you later

17:01Take care

17:02See you in a bit

17:03Love you

17:03Bye

17:04Love you

17:05Bye

17:05Love you

17:05Bye

17:06Bye

17:07Bye

17:09Paddington

17:10Of course you were shouting a boyfriend over a summer

17:12Paddington

17:14Thank god he was a dog

17:15Erm, just want to say

17:17Muffins, Muffins, Muffins

17:19Thank you

17:20And Muffins shout out to

17:21Ash

17:22McDonough

17:23VR

17:24And Vince

17:25Thank you so much for your donation

17:28And

17:29Erm

17:30Can you tell Megan

17:3210 nearly 13

17:33To stop fighting

17:36Megan

17:37Stop fighting

17:38It's proper anger

17:39I can smell it from her

17:41Oh my god

17:42I'm only joking

17:43Erm

17:44Simple Gamer

17:45Thank you so much for your donation

17:47That's amazing

17:48Thank you

17:50But definitely Megan

17:51Stop fighting

17:52Because that's grim

17:54Erm

17:57Yeah

17:57This is yours anyway

17:59Can you say hi to me

18:01Liam

18:03Someone or other

18:05Liam

18:06Menzies

18:07Wanted me to say hello to him

18:09Hi

18:10Erm

18:11Hey

18:13Oh my god

18:13Team

18:14Isaac

18:14Please

18:15Roblox

18:15Hi

18:16Hi

18:17Erm

18:19My

18:20Don't put your numbers

18:21Don't put your numbers in the comments guys

18:22I won't

18:23I won't ring it

18:24I definitely won't ring it

18:26Erm

18:26But

18:27This time I'm going to ring Hannah

18:29From Lucas

18:32Lucas

18:32Asked me to ring Hannah

18:41When are you going to ring

18:42Hello

18:43When are you going to be

18:44Hello

18:44Is that

18:45Is that Hannah

18:46Oh no

18:47I'll just get her for you now

18:49Thank you

18:51Hello

18:52Hi is that Hannah

18:54Yeah please

18:56Is it

18:57Hannah

18:59Hello

18:59Hi Hannah

19:00My name's Tim

19:01And I'm 306

19:03Lucas

19:03Has asked me to ring you

19:07Alright

19:07What are you doing

19:10I'm

19:11Just in the living room

19:12With my little brother

19:13Because it's his birthday

19:14Yay

19:15How old is he

19:17He's two today

19:19Two

19:20Yeah

19:22I'm older than him

19:23Because I'm three nearly six

19:27What did he get for his birthday

19:29We went for a nice picnic in the park

19:32Oh that's amazing

19:34Did you keep the distance so

19:37Don't worry though Tim

19:38We're still staying the two metres

19:39Staying two metres

19:41That's the best thing about this lockdown

19:44That we have to stay two metres

19:46Because Uncle Barry's not allowed round anymore

19:53So who's

19:54What's your little brother called

19:56What's his name

19:57His name's Noah

19:59What

20:01Noah

20:02Yeah

20:06What

20:07Noah

20:09Noah yeah

20:10Am I saying that right

20:12Noah

20:13Oh Noah

20:14I thought you were saying

20:15Noah

20:18What

20:18Noah the elephant

20:19Noah

20:23So

20:23What did you get Noah

20:25For his birthday

20:26What did you get him

20:27I got him like a bowling pin set

20:31So he can bowl

20:32In the garden

20:35Does he even know how to bowl

20:36He kind of lifted his own head

20:37I don't can't

20:41That's funny

20:42Did he get a birthday cake

20:45No he didn't get a birthday cake

20:47No

20:48Didn't he even get a birthday cake

20:50And he's two years old

20:52Oh my god

20:53I feel so bad for Noah

20:58Right

20:58I just wanted to ring and say

21:00Martha's hello

21:01Because

21:02I want to say happy birthday

21:04To Noah

21:06Oh

21:07Happy birthday

21:09Thank you

21:10Happy birthday Noah

21:12Yay

21:13Say thank you

21:15It's a shame you didn't get a birthday cake

21:17A bit tight that innit

21:20But wait

21:21Next year

21:22When you

21:22When you get to three

21:24Nearly six

21:25Then you'll get a birthday cake

21:26Then you'll be worthy

21:27Of a birthday cake

21:29Yeah you'll be worthy

21:30You're so tight

21:33Right

21:34I'm going to go

21:35But stay safe

21:36And happy birthday Noah

21:38Thank you

21:39See you in a bit

21:40Love you

21:42Bye

21:42Love you

21:43Bye

21:44Bye

21:45Bye

21:47Happy birthday Noah

21:51Why did I think she was saying Noah

21:54That's a silly name

21:56Noah

21:57I know

21:58No birth cake

21:59That's well tight innit

22:00Liam Menzies

22:01Well tight

22:02Proper

22:02Tight

22:03We don't get a birthday cake

22:05For the birthday

22:06My mum don't get a birthday

22:08For the birthday

22:09She's

22:10Fine

22:14Can I say my vid idea

22:17Yeah you can

22:18Tell me your vid idea

22:19No problem

22:22Mike Tyson

22:23Are you going to watch my

22:25Who's gone

22:26Mike

22:27I'm going to crack home

22:28With another coke

22:29It's going too fast again

22:31Call an exterminator

22:33What to get rid of my mum

22:36Susan

22:37Me and Susan

22:38Because Cheryl

22:39Will give me a number

22:40So you'd better make sure

22:42You answer Susan

22:43Hi Sue

22:47Hi

22:49I should have been

22:50Carl Baskin

22:51Come on Baskin

22:59Hello

23:00I was telling me to them

23:04Hi is that Susan

23:05Yeah

23:06Hi Susan

23:07Are you okay

23:08Yeah

23:10My friend's with me

23:12What

23:13My friend's with me

23:15Who's your friend

23:16Shannon

23:17Who

23:18Shannon

23:23What's his name

23:25Shannon

23:27Shannon

23:28No Shannon

23:30Oh Shannon

23:31Shannon I thought you were saying

23:33Gummon

23:35Say hi

23:37Hi

23:38Hi

23:38Hi Gummon

23:42Are you okay

23:43Shannon

23:44Yeah you

23:45Yeah I'm good

23:46What

23:47What have you been doing

23:47During lockdown

23:49Nothing really

23:50With me

23:51With me

23:52Roadblock

23:52Have you been

23:53Have you been

23:54Doing your homework

23:56Yeah I've done some

23:57Earlier

23:57Have you got any left

24:00I'm not going back to school

24:01Are you tiny Pim

24:02Are you not going back to school

24:04No not yet

24:06What ever again

24:07No

24:09What you beast

24:11You've got to go to school

24:14I'm not

24:15I'm not

24:16Tiny Pim

24:16What

24:16Tiny Pim

24:17Guess what

24:18Alex broke my water tap

24:21What

24:22Alex broke the garden water tap

24:25Alex did

24:26Yeah

24:27Oh my god

24:28Alex why are you breaking

24:29The garden water tap

24:30What are you doing that for

24:31Did you marry me

24:34And I'm not old enough

24:35To get married

24:36I'm three nearly six

24:37You maniac

24:39You're not three nearly six

24:40You're four nearly seven

24:42I'm three nearly six

24:44Tiny Pim

24:45Tiny Pim

24:45My dad's birthday's coming up

24:46He's four nearly seven

24:48Your dad's four nearly seven

24:51Yeah

24:51Well he needs to be in jail

24:53That's too young to have kids

24:58So

24:59So

24:59I've got to tell you what

25:01To make sure that you're doing

25:03Your school work

25:03Because if you don't do it

25:05Then you'll just end up

25:06Like smacking Steve

25:07Proper thick

25:12If you're four nearly seven

25:14You're only too long to have kids

25:17Don't do it

25:20Yeah

25:21That's what I said

25:22Yeah I said it

25:25Right listen

25:26I'm going to go

25:27Because I've got loads of people to ring

25:30Okay

25:30So make sure you go

25:32Do your homework

25:33And stay safe

25:34Okay

25:35I have no homework

25:37Until I go to high school

25:38Can you call me

25:40I've not got your number

25:42His number is

25:43Oh

25:44No don't tell me

25:45Don't tell me

25:46Don't tell me

25:46Don't tell me the number

25:47Don't tell me the number

25:49If I've got your number

25:50Then maybe I'll ring it

25:51Okay

25:55Wait

25:55Someone wants to say hi

26:00Okay

26:00Wait there

26:01I said

26:02I've got my friend

26:03My friend's number

26:06No don't shout it out

26:07Just message it

26:08Then I'll ring it

26:09Okay

26:10I've got to go

26:11I've got to go

26:12Go for people to ring

26:13So see in a bit

26:14Okay

26:14We're gone

26:15It's just a cup

26:18See in a bit

26:19Love you

26:20Bye

26:23Smackhead Tom

26:24No go smackhead Tom

26:26Ash

26:27Mick

26:27You can't knock smackhead Tom

26:29You've got smackhead Steve

26:30You've got smackhead Steve

26:33So

26:34I can't have smackhead Tom

26:38OMG

26:39Tiny turn

26:40That was off phase

26:42Don't put your number

26:43In the comments

26:43I won't ring it

26:46Definitely 1 billion percent

26:47Won't ring it

26:48I won't ring it

26:50Cat

26:52Cat girl

26:53Vlogs

26:54Say hi to me

26:55Hi cat girl vlogs

26:57Hi

27:00Say hi to me please

27:03That's Shakira Jackson

27:04Hi

27:05Right

27:06Next number

27:11Carmel

27:16Where's

27:17Carmel live

27:19This might not go through

27:22I'm ringing Carmel

27:26She's in Ireland

27:28Top of the morning

27:29This is Carmel

27:32Wes

27:36Mooncraft

27:37Thank you so much

27:38Mooncraft

27:40Hello

27:41Hello

27:43Hi

27:44Is that Carmel

27:50Carmel

27:50Yeah hang on

27:55Hello

27:55Hello is that Carmel

27:58It is yeah

27:59Hi Carmel

28:00My name's

28:00Why are you ringing me

28:01On a Monday night phone

28:03My name's Tim

28:05I'm 3-0-6

28:09I'm 6

28:11I'm all right

28:12Are you okay

28:14I'm fine

28:15I'm going to make

28:16a good dinner

28:17You ain't

28:18You having your dinner

28:20No

28:21I'm cooking dinner

28:22Oh I'm so sorry

28:23What are you having

28:25None of your business

28:27I know

28:28Chicken and potatoes

28:29Chicken and potatoes

28:34Yeah not an exciting

28:37Have you had

28:38Have you had

28:40Dinner yet

28:41Who's barking

28:42In the background

28:43Is my mum there

28:48It's my son

28:50Your son's barking

28:53Oh yeah

28:54Oh my god

28:55That's what the call

28:56But that's something

28:57That's so funny

28:58Um yeah

29:00I've had

29:00I've had my tea

29:02I had a kebab

29:06Oh lovely

29:07Donut kebab or chicken

29:08Um donut kebab

29:12I had a

29:12I had a donut kebab

29:14I wanted to have with a kebab

29:15Pardon

29:17I wanted to have

29:18What did you want a kebab

29:19I had

29:22Just a kebab

29:23I just had a kebab

29:27What's that on

29:28You don't have to run

29:29No I just like

29:30A donut kebab

29:31And a little bit of salad

29:32But I didn't eat a salad

29:33No

29:35Oh no

29:35I don't eat salad

29:36I don't know

29:36That's too boring

29:37Yeah that's boring

29:38But you're having

29:39Chicken and potatoes

29:41Yeah

29:43Is that it

29:44Quite boring

29:45Yeah

29:46No gravy

29:47I'm a new version of

29:48Yes

29:48Yes I'm actually

29:50Making the gravy

29:51Now we're talking to you

29:52On the phone

29:53Oh my god

29:54You're really

29:55Discarding me like

29:56Right I'm really sorry

29:59That sounds like

30:01My mum's there

30:05Hello

30:06Hello

30:08Who is it

30:09My name's Tim

30:10I'm three nearly six

30:15He's not talking

30:16He's too shy

30:16Is that why I'm here dad

30:22That's why he's trying

30:23But he's too shy

30:25But he won't talk

30:26How old is he

30:27I'm listening to him

30:28I'm listening to him

30:29How old is he

30:34He's 15

30:35And then I'm 18

30:37And I'm 22

30:39And I'm stuck with him

30:40For all the lockdowns

30:42So yeah

30:42No you can still put

30:44You can still put him up

30:46For adoption

30:47It's not too late

30:52I wish

30:53I don't want to get you

30:53But he'd be taking them

30:54Right listen

30:58I'll get you back

30:58Onto your graver

31:01No I'm not

31:02I can't

31:03Alright

31:04I'll see you in a bit

31:05Love you

31:06See you in a bit

31:08Love you

31:09Bye

31:12It's eating chicken and potatoes

31:16I just want to say

31:18Maffis

31:19Maffis thank you

31:20To IndyKills

31:22For your donation

31:23Hi Hattie

31:26Are you okay

31:28Just going to do another call quick

31:30I'm getting too hot

31:31Oh

31:32It's why I'm getting too hot

31:36Call McDonald's

31:37They're not open yet

31:38They're opening this week though

31:43I've got an itch in me belly

31:47Right

31:48Beatbox for us

31:49What

31:50I always have

31:50Beatbox every week

31:53I'll beatbox every week

31:55Right

31:55Next call I'm ringing

31:57Is

31:58Matter

31:58Because Elizabeth

32:00Has sent me a number

32:01Ringing Matter

32:03This is the Vodafone

32:04But he's not there

32:05Because I'm Vodafone

32:08Vodafone

32:08While I'm melting

32:10I've got a fan on my feet

32:12But I'm still roasting it

32:14I can't win KFC

32:15Because they're just far too busy

32:19Did you see that Ikea opened

32:21Ikea's opened

32:23Five mile queues

32:26To get in

32:27To Ikea

32:30Someone

32:31Someone loves

32:33Meatballs

32:35Surprise my mum

32:36One there

32:37Shit

32:38My mum loves

32:39Meatballs

32:41Right

32:42Next call

32:46I'm ringing

32:48Nicola

32:48From Jackie

32:52Not ringing

32:53999

32:54Hello

32:55Hello

32:58Is that Nicola

32:59It is

33:01Hi Nicola

33:01My name's Tim

33:02And I'm three nearly six

33:04And Jackie's told me to ring you

33:09You're taking the mic

33:10I'm not

33:11I'm Tim

33:12I'm three nearly six

33:15Are you okay

33:18This is a piss dick

33:20It's not

33:21My name's Tim

33:22Jackie told me to ring you

33:25I promise

33:26You're live on YouTube

33:32What are you doing

33:33Why are you not

33:34Talking to me

33:36This is a

33:37This is a

33:38Complete

33:41I promise you

33:44Promise you

33:45My name's Tim

33:46And Jackie told me to ring you

33:47Ask Jackie

33:48When you finish talking to me

33:52What are you doing

33:53How's your lockdown going

33:55It's a pain in the butt

33:56It is

33:57Proper rubbish

33:58Isn't it

33:58Are you

33:59Are you all away in Scotland

34:01I am yet

34:02Have you found the Loch Ness Monster yet

34:05There's a few living here

34:10My mum looks like the Loch Ness Monster

34:12What along with your uncle Barry

34:14Yeah I think my real dad

34:16Is the Loch Ness Monster

34:18Because he's been missing for years

34:20He's all locked up in the attic

34:22Yeah he's got

34:23He's just disappeared

34:24He's just disappeared

34:26What have you been doing today

34:29Not a great deal

34:31Walking the dogs

34:32Oh how many dogs have you got

34:34Two

34:35What are they

34:37Westy

34:38And

34:40Cairn Terrier Cross

34:41Oh right

34:42They're small dogs

34:44Yeah

34:45I've got a Maffis dog

34:46And my dog's poo

34:47Is probably bigger than your dog's

34:51Maffis dogs

34:52So have you been watching my videos

34:55Yep

34:56What's your favourite

34:58The time where they got waxed

35:00Oh what

35:01On the face

35:02Or the full body

35:03The full body one

35:05Oh my god

35:06That was the worst pain ever

35:083-0-6

35:09But

35:093-0-6 year old

35:11Shouldn't go through that sort of pain

35:13Oh now come on

35:13You did it for Chardonnay

35:15Yeah

35:15Because Chardonnay

35:17Didn't even see it

35:18After he did it

35:19The stupid cow

35:22Right

35:23I just thought I'd ring

35:24And see how you're doing

35:25Okay

35:25But

35:26I've got to go

35:27Because I've got loads of people

35:28To ring

35:29Okay

35:30Thank you

35:31But

35:31Make sure you stay safe

35:32And I'll see you soon

35:33Okay

35:34You too

35:35Say hello to Jackie

35:36For a man

35:37See you in a bit

35:37Thanks

35:38Bye

35:38Love you

35:40Love you

35:41Bye

35:41Love you

35:41Bye

35:42Bye

35:45Time to find the Loch Ness Monster

35:50Oh wow

35:51So

35:52Don't put your number in the comments

35:54I won't ring it

35:55So it's pointless

35:59Um

36:01Where do you

36:02Where do you put your number

36:03Send it

36:04On Facebook

36:05Messenger

36:06Go to Tiny Tim on Facebook

36:08Tiny Tim's Adventures

36:09Put it on Facebook

36:11And it'll go into

36:12Like a list

36:13I've got thousands of numbers

36:15But we pick them at random

36:16We'll just pick them all at random

36:18So we'll just ring

36:20Whoever

36:21So it'll just be at random

36:23Um

36:27Let me

36:31Get another number

36:33Where's Uncle Barry

36:34Oh no

36:35No I've seen him since the lockdown

36:38Not seen him since the lockdown

36:40So

36:40Next number

36:41I am going to

36:42Ring

36:44Is

36:44Ruth

36:45From David

36:48David asked me to ring

36:49Ruth

36:50Hi this is Ruth

36:51I can't come

36:52She can't come to the phone right now

36:55Cause she's on gif gaff

36:58Um

37:01Hi from England

37:02I'm from England

37:03I'm in Manchester

37:06Manchester

37:10Why did I do that

37:12Um

37:14Smack it Steve's there

37:16The Crazy Alex

37:18There's Smack it Steve

37:20Right

37:21Who am I ringing

37:22Ringing someone in Liverpool

37:25Um

37:25Ringing Daniel

37:26From Marie

37:28Ringing Daniel

37:30You've dialed an incorrect

37:31But that's not the right number for Daniel

37:34Who else have I got

37:38Um

37:40Just

37:40I just fell over

37:42Ketchup King

37:43Why did you fall over

37:46Um

37:470161 0161

37:49Manchester

37:50Manchester

37:500161 0161

37:52Um

37:53Right

37:54Next

37:54I am

37:55Ringing

37:58Liam

37:59Janet

38:00Tell me to ring you

38:02Janet

38:03Send me

38:05Welcome to the EE voicemail

38:07And

38:07EE

38:08Isn't answering

38:09Isn't answering

38:11The one who talked to me

38:13Is my mate

38:14Number me

38:15I'm not bothered

38:16Hi Aaron

38:18Shakira

38:19Shakira Jackson

38:20Asked me to say

38:20Hello to Aaron

38:21Hi Aaron

38:22Okay

38:23Um

38:24Next number

38:25We've got

38:27Alice

38:27From Daniel

38:28Alice

38:31Um

38:33Sarah Stanton

38:35Say

38:35Um

38:36Jay

38:37Mullet

38:37Hi

38:38Hello

38:42Gooey

38:42Gary

38:43Gooey Gary

38:44Keep seeing that pop up

38:46Hi from New Zealand

38:47Hi New Zealand

38:50That's far away that

38:53Further for me

38:55Because I'm in Manchester

38:57I've been to Manchester before

38:59But only for a boring reason

39:01There's no boring reason

39:03Carry on through to Alice Jackson

39:04Hi Alice Jackson

39:06There's no boring reason

39:08To come to Manchester

39:09We've got roads

39:10Popping off

39:12So good

39:13Jack

39:14Pattist

39:15Hello

39:17Um

39:18Who just stepped in bird poo

39:21That's disgusting

39:23At least they want dog poo

39:25That's a good thing

39:27Um

39:28Hello Nat

39:31Um

39:32Carly Foster

39:33Hello Carly Foster

39:35Um

39:35I'm gonna ring

39:39Zachary

39:39From Amy

39:42Zachary

39:46Zachary

39:47Beep

39:48Beep

39:49Beep

39:49I'm gonna try and ring Zachary again

39:53And someone just said

39:55Black lives matter

39:56Yes they do

39:58Absolutely

40:01Hi from Kosovo

40:04Hello Kosovo

40:06Hey from Cheshire Carpet Cleaners

40:09Hi guys

40:11Cheshire Carpet Cleaners

40:13Welcome to the O2

40:14They're not answering

40:16Um

40:17Cheshire Carpet Cleaners

40:19Come and do me carpet

40:20As soon as you're allowed back out

40:21Okay

40:21I need you to do it

40:24I'm not even joking

40:28EG Music

40:29Hi from Kosovo again

40:31EG Music

40:32Hello Ruth

40:34Hi

40:35Um

40:38Greets from Graz

40:40Um

40:42Hello from Devin

40:43Hi I'm from Cornwall

40:44Wow

40:45Manchester here

40:47Yep yep yep yep yep yep

40:49Right

40:50I'm gonna ring

40:52Um

40:53Mark

40:55From Kaz

40:57Mark

40:59Welcome to GiveGov's voice

41:00GiveGov yay

41:05GiveGov

41:06Um

41:07Um

41:09Muffy shout out to Pete

41:10Laxative

41:12Lesley

41:13That's what you said

41:15Laxative

41:15Lesley

41:16Hi Pete

41:17Thank you so much for your donation

41:19Um

41:20Ring Pooey Pat

41:24Pooey Pat

41:25Um

41:26But

41:27I'm not ringing

41:28Pooey Pat

41:29Hello Cardiff

41:30Hello Manchester

41:31Andrew Reynolds

41:33And James

41:34Bending

41:34Um

41:36But I'm gonna ring

41:37I'm ringing

41:38Um

41:43Melanie's grandkids

41:47Boop boop boop

41:49Melanie's grandkids

41:51Um

41:51Answering

41:52Um

41:53Mr. Freddo

41:55Can I have a shout out

41:56What

41:57Mr. Freddo

41:58Why have you put your prize up to 25p for a Freddo

42:00That's called theft

42:02Stop it

42:04Um

42:05No I don't have Roblox

42:07Hello Sheffield

42:08Um

42:11Hi from Sophia

42:13Hi

42:14Hi from Stockport

42:16That's

42:17Five minutes away from where I live

42:20Red car

42:21Yes

42:22Chewbacca

42:24Grrrr

42:25Grrrr

42:26Grrrr

42:27Grrrr

42:27Can't do it this week

42:30Grrrr

42:31Grrrr

42:31Can't do it

42:33Grrrr

42:34Grrrr

42:34That was a good one wasn't it

42:36That was a good one

42:37Hi from Red car

42:40Um

42:40What else have I got

42:42Hi from London

42:44London

42:47Next number I've got is

42:49Chris from Tom

42:51Oh

42:52That'd be funny if Chris was called Jerry

42:55Because that'd be Tom from Jerry

42:59Nicky Howarth

43:01Hi

43:10Stratford

43:12No one wanted to talk to me today

43:15Hello Nat

43:17Thank you so much

43:19You are so funny dog

43:21Thank you

43:23Um

43:24Hi Dorset

43:27Um

43:28South Africa

43:29I'm going South Africa next year

43:31If we're allowed out

43:33I'm going South Africa

43:35I'm going Jayburg

43:36I'm going Jayburg mate

43:38Um

43:39But this is

43:43Kyla

43:44From Natalie

43:45What if it's Kyla Minogue

43:48Fabi Gawanna

43:53I am calling people

43:55Hi from Northern Ireland

44:05Welcome to the O2 message

44:07No one wanted to talk to me today

44:10Flippin' heck

44:12Um

44:13I'm from America

44:15Not me

44:16Um

44:18Um

44:18Hi from Tadley

44:19Getting all over the place

44:21Aren't we

44:21Getting everywhere

44:23Called Gif Guff

44:25Gif Guff

44:27Um

44:28Hi from the Netherlands

44:30Hello Netherlands

44:31Um

44:32Hi from Tadley

44:34Right

44:35This is

44:36Hannah

44:37From

44:38Lusa

44:41Hannah from Lusa

44:43Better answer

44:47Newcastle

44:48Hi

44:48Hi Australia

44:52Hello

44:53Hello

44:53Is that

44:54Is that Hannah

44:55Yes it's Hannah

44:57Hi Hannah

44:58My name's Tim

44:59And I'm three nearly six

45:00And Lucy told me to ring you

45:02Yeah I guessed it would have been Lucy

45:05Yeah

45:05What

45:06Who's Lucy

45:07My sister

45:08Oh

45:09Is

45:09Is that your only sister

45:10No no

45:12I've got another two

45:13But I don't speak to them

45:14Oh right

45:15Oh sorry

45:16Will you speak to Lusa

45:18Yeah yeah

45:19Not after tonight

45:22What have you been doing

45:23You were called

45:24Um

45:25Pedro

45:25What

45:27You remember

45:28You were called Pedro

45:29Yeah I remember

45:30Being in Pedro

45:31Yeah yeah

45:32Pedro's my kid's dad

45:33Oh really

45:36Pedro was funny

45:37Because of

45:38He's out of Peppa Pig

45:40Pedro

45:40Pedro Pona

45:44Can you just say hello to my

45:46Uh six year old Dylan

45:48Guess who's on the phone

45:50No not Lucy

45:52Hello Dylan

45:57Dylan it's me

45:58It's Tim

45:59I'm three nearly six

46:02He's legged it

46:03Why has he run away

46:05Go get him

46:07What

46:08How was your lockdown treating you

46:09Are you okay

46:11Are you speaking to me or Dylan

46:13Because Dylan's not listening

46:14No I'm talking to you now

46:18Lucy's dead after this

46:19Don't kill her

46:21Especially

46:21Don't admit to it

46:24What have you been doing today

46:27Um

46:28Nothing

46:29Oh that sounds amazing

46:31No

46:32Nothing

46:33Nothing whatsoever

46:34It's boring isn't it

46:35I've seen Lucy earlier on

46:36But that's it

46:37Does Lucy live near you

46:39Or too far

46:40Nah

46:41Nah only about ten minutes

46:42That's alright isn't it

46:45Have you not been out to the park or anything

46:48Now my two year old is shouting you

46:51Oh what's your two year old called

46:53Oscar

46:54I've got a dog called Oscar

46:57Oh nice

46:58I know

46:59Oscar

47:01Oscar

47:02Oscar

47:05Where's Oscar

47:07Where's Oscar

47:07Sit in front of the phone

47:09Hello Oscar

47:13They're supposed to be in bed but

47:15Get to bed

47:19Right I just

47:20Go to bed

47:23Go to bed

47:28He's telling you now

47:30Oh cheeky little monkey

47:33Oh

47:34When are they going back

47:37When are they going back

47:40Hopefully this month sometime

47:42I'm not sure

47:44I can hear them shouting you

47:48That's cute

47:50Right listen

47:51I've got to go

47:52Because I've got other people to ring

47:54Yeah okay

47:55I'm messaging Lucy as we speak

47:57Because I know she's watching your live video as well

48:00Okay

48:01Lucy just get prepared for me calling you in a second

48:06It's kicking off

48:07Right

48:09I'll speak too soon okay

48:11I'll speak too soon

48:12Love you

48:13Love you

48:14Bye

48:14Love you

48:14Bye

48:16It's going to kick off

48:18It's going to go proper mad

48:21Right listen

48:23Everyone keeps asking me to beatbox

48:37That good

48:38That good enough for you

48:40Yeah that's good

48:46There you go

48:50There you go

48:52Right I'm going to go

48:53Because I'm going live

48:54On Facebook

48:56In about 10 minutes

48:58So

48:58Get on Facebook

49:00I'm going to do a few more calls

49:01I'm going to speak to other people

49:03But make sure you're subscribing to my channel

49:05Turn on your notifications

49:07We're nearly at a million

49:09Oh my god

49:10I'm going to do a Mathis video

49:12I'm going to hit a million

49:13So make sure you go and subscribe

49:15Turn on notifications

49:16Go on Facebook

49:18Tiny Tim's Adventures

49:19Get on there

49:20Get following

49:21And hopefully I get to see you on there as well

49:24Instagram

49:25TinyTim.Adventures

49:26And go on my TikTok

49:29My TikTok

49:30There's loads of copycats

49:32But don't follow it

49:33My TikTok

49:34Is

49:36TinyTimAdventures

49:37So

49:38Make sure

49:38TinyTim's Adventure

49:40So just put in TinyTim

49:41It'll find it

49:42But make sure you go and follow it

49:43Instagram

49:44TinyTim.Adventures

49:46But I will see you on Facebook

49:49If you go on there

49:50But I'll be back on tomorrow

49:51Live

49:52Doing more calls

49:53So make sure you get on there

49:54And I will see you

49:56In a bit

49:56See you later

49:57Thanks for watching

49:58See you later

49:59Love you

50:00Bye

50:00Bye.

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