00:00Oh, I'm starving. I could die for some burritos and some nachos.
00:04Wey, no manches. You know that isn't a real Mexican food, right?
00:08No.
00:09We don't eat that here.
00:10What do you eat that?
00:11I'm going to cook some real comida mexicana. Vámonos.
00:14Amigo, I was thinking of getting some stuff tonight, you know?
00:19Like vaporub, or qué?
00:20You can help me, right? For...
00:22No manches, wey. Not every Mexican is a dractyla, man.
00:26Ah, you can tell me. I won't tell you anymore.
00:28That's a lack of respect. Go to the chingal. Go, go, go.
00:32I made you some real Mexican food, tacos.
00:36Oh, wait a second. That's not a taco.
00:40I know what a taco looks like. I've been to Taco Bell.
00:48Taco Bell is a fucking gringada, you know?
00:50De los gringos. It's not Mexican food.
00:53Bro, do you have any plans on fleeing to the U.S. yet?
00:57No, should I?
00:59I thought it's every Mexican's dream to go there, no?
01:02Wait, are we being watched?
01:04Blink once if I should get help.
01:12I knew it!
01:13Alright, let's try this thing.
01:17Hey, no, no, no, no, no. What are you doing?
01:20Uh, what do you mean?
01:22You can't eat tacos without putting a chingo de limón on there, man.
01:28Ah, chingo de limón.
01:29Ah, okay, okay, I'm good.
01:31Chingo, chingo.
01:35Hey, amigo, I was wondering which cartel are you in, by the way?
01:38All Mexicans have to be in a cartel, right?
01:40Kiwi?
01:41I was always wondering, can you just choose one or do you have to be born into one?
01:50Ah, dude, I just love Mexico. You know, I go to Cancun every year.
01:54Cancun isn't the real Mexico, you know that, right?
01:56No? I thought it's the best place in Mexico. That's why everybody's going there, no?
02:01NO! It's a gringo hell.
02:04It's full of gringos that are treated the worst way possible.
02:10God, I hate this mariachi music.
02:15It's so gay, right?
02:17Check this back, man. It's so...
02:19Hey, bro, I was wondering, how many people have you killed?
02:23What?
02:23I mean, what's your number? You can tell me.
02:27You will be...
02:29NUMBERED!
02:31Hey, amigo.
02:32Why is there pictures of this shemale everywhere?
02:35Man, this is Frida Kahlo. She's a national hero.
02:39For what? Having the biggest juniper in the country or what?
02:46What?
02:48Dona carnal, I need that you take care of this p****** güero m******on.
02:54Passale lanza.
02:56Si, ya valio.
02:58Si, ya valio.
