00:00My name is Jo.
00:01My name is Aparna.
00:03We're going to be talking to you about womanhood.
00:09Hi.
00:10Oh, welcome.
00:11Today, we're going to talk about...
00:15Puberty.
00:17What a horrible time. Get ready.
00:20Has it hit you yet?
00:22I feel like a little bit more every day.
00:25Yesterday, I started getting pimples on my back.
00:28Ew.
00:29Puberty is a magical time in a woman's life.
00:32It can happen to men, too, but we don't care about that today.
00:36Oh, you know what that means.
00:38It's time for our puberty lightning round.
00:42We're going to tell you everything to expect when you're expecting puberty.
00:46Puberty.
00:47Your period will arrive, usually on an occasion when it's not convenient.
00:54Expansion of the hips.
00:55The hips are going to get wider than you ever felt was possible.
00:58Acne on your face because of changing hormones.
01:01Your nipples are going to expand wider, faster, and longer.
01:06Body hair.
01:07You're taking all of body hair?
01:10Body hair in your pits.
01:12Not your knee pits, your armpits.
01:14Meats are going to taste different.
01:16You may develop cat-like reflexes.
01:18But your thoughts are going to go slower.
01:20Sometimes your feelings will develop their own web presence.
01:25Uh-oh.
01:26We're out of time.
01:30Puberty has a lot of instructions.
01:32We're going to teach you how to do certain things.
01:34If you're 11 and 12 and just tuning in, this is the time.
01:37Turn it up and take out your notebooks.
01:39First thing we're going to tell you is how to put in a tampon.
01:42A tampon is a white cotton stick, usually with a string at the end.
01:46What you're going to want to do is put your legs as far apart as possible.
01:50Form a triangle with your legs and the floor.
01:54If it helps, think of the Bermuda Triangle.
01:57Wide.
01:58Wide, wide, wide.
01:59Next thing you're going to want to do is unwrap your tampon.
02:03The plastic coating does not go in your body.
02:05Are your legs still spread apart?
02:08You're not?
02:08Get back to work.
02:10Now, what you didn't know is that you have about seven holes down there.
02:14It's eight for some people.
02:17Now you're going to find the middle one.
02:18This could be anywhere from hole three to hole five.
02:22Careful!
02:23If it hurts, bingo.
02:26Wrong hole.
02:27Ouch!
02:28Ouch!
02:28Now what you're going to do is think of it like a gun.
02:32Are ghosts real?
02:34Sometimes I think they're more real than we are.
02:38Huh.
02:39Does that mean I'm dead?
02:41Oh.
02:42Do you know what I'm trying to say?
02:44It's okay.
02:45You're doing great.
02:46We forgot the first step was to take your underwear off.
02:49Oh.
02:51What's your underwear on this whole time?
02:54You silly fool.
02:55Now I'm going to walk you through walking with a pad.
02:59Once you have your pad on, it should feel like an air mattress under your vagina.
03:05Hopefully not too much air is in it.
03:08If it feels that way, uh, stab it a couple times with like a fork or maybe your phone charger
03:17if it's nearby.
03:19Now that you're out of your chair, take a few steps.
03:22It's okay.
03:23I'm right here.
03:25Take one step forward with your right or your left.
03:28I don't want to make your decisions for you.
03:30Uh oh.
03:32Yeah.
03:32You're running late.
03:33That sounds like me.
03:35You're a woman on the go.
03:36You're powerful.
03:37Oop.
03:38Everything fell out of your purse.
03:40Reset.
03:41You're standing back up.
03:43Uh, just give it a little tuck and you're off again.
03:47Congratulations.
03:48You've made it halfway down the hallway.
03:53Thank you, Frank.
03:55Extra Mary.
03:57So you want to know how to put on a bra.
03:59So does everybody.
04:00So does everybody.
04:01You're not special.
04:01Special.
04:02Special.
04:02This is early technology from Psych Ward.
04:05So what they did is they said, this will help the women control their hormones and raging sexuality.
04:12Buckle them in.
04:14Basically, the bra is shaped like two candy balls stuck together with glue.
04:20Now you've got the claws in front of you.
04:22Now, depending on your cup size, this is either going to range from one hook to up to 12.
04:27I'm so sorry if it's 12.
04:30So now you put your arms through the holes.
04:33Ride those straps up so that they're on top.
04:35You put your little lumps in the cups.
04:37Make sure they're in there.
04:39You're ready to go.
04:41I think you nailed it.
04:42What is it?
04:43Well, that's all the time we've got for today.
04:45Hope you learned everything you need to know about puberty.
04:50And if you feel like you're missing some parts.
04:53You can put it in the comments below.
04:55Everyone knows internet comments are kind of pretty accurate.
