00:00She's so likable, relatable, clumsy and adorable, not looking for love, but she stumbles upon it.
00:05This is the real life of a rom-com protagonist.
00:08So then I nursed the baby pigeons until they were full-grown pigeons.
00:12That is so sweet. You know, I don't think I've ever seen a baby pigeon before.
00:16Oh, they're absolutely terrifying and disgusting.
00:19But, you know, when I see a living thing, I just gotta care for it.
00:25Maisie, I want to take care of you for the rest of my life.
00:31Maisie, don't do it!
00:34Finn, but I thought you were...
00:35They're ministering vaccines in Sweden.
00:37Turns out they have wide, widespread access to vaccinations in Sweden.
00:40It's actually an amazing state-run health care system.
00:42We can learn a lot from them.
00:44Hey, I'm Ralph.
00:46I'm Finn. Nice to meet you.
00:47Nice to meet you.
00:48He seems really nice.
00:49Kind of too nice.
00:51Do you mind if I...
00:52Oh, no, go right ahead. I'm not an obstacle.
00:56Maisie, every night I spent staring at the pollution-free Scandinavian airport,
01:00I saw your eyes in the stars.
01:01And I saw your smile in my morning muesli.
01:04And I saw your lips in my tiny gummy redfish.
01:07Swedish fish.
01:08Actually, in Sweden it's called Storf and Hagfisk,
01:10which translates to Big Fatty Loudfish Loud, after Americans.
01:17Maisie, will you make me the happiest man in the whole world?
01:22Maisie, don't do it!
01:24Todd, but I thought you were...
01:26on that rock-carrying retreat in Yellowstone.
01:28I came back for you.
01:30Well, uh, Ralph was actually proposing,
01:32and then he kind of let Finn do it, too.
01:34So I think we're kind of busy here right now.
01:37Do what you gotta do, man.
01:38Yeah, we'll be here.
01:39Why are you guys being so cool about this?
01:41Maisie, don't turn your back on our relationship.
01:44Do you remember how I made you feel that night in Carl's Big Heaven?
01:48How'd you make her feel?
01:49It's called the T-Spot.
01:51It's an even more powerful place on a woman than the G-Spot.
01:54And I discovered it, so the scientist named it after me.
01:57What's that G-Spot?
01:59It's a good spot.
02:00Maisie!
02:01Maisie, don't do it!
02:02Jesus fucking Christ!
02:03Who's this guy?
02:04That's Walter.
02:05Hey, sup guys?
02:06Hey!
02:06You guys know each other?
02:08Yeah, we go to the same allergist slash passivity coach.
02:11Oh, wait, you guys are brothers, right?
02:13But, like, it's really weird that I didn't notice that before.
02:16We're pretty much the same guy.
02:18Anyway, Maisie, will you?
02:21Maisie, don't do it!
02:22Who are you?
02:24I'm Eric.
02:25I've been watching you from the bar this whole time, and I love you.
02:28Hey, wait your turn.
02:30Maisie, come away with me.
02:31Hang on a second.
02:31I don't mean to split hairs or anything, but I was here first, so I think maybe you should...
02:34Shut up!
02:35No, he's right, though.
02:37I'm the one that gave you a story.
02:39Excuse me!
02:40All right!
02:40Do I get a say in this?
02:42Or are you too busy comparing your dicks right now?
02:45No.
02:45All right?
02:46You can't just wander in here whenever you feel and sweep me off my feet, all right?
02:50None of you have called me in years.
02:53Not even a text message.
02:55And I don't know who you are.
02:56I don't know him.
02:57Hey, guys.
02:58I'm Eric.
02:59Hey, Eric.
03:00No!
03:00None of this.
03:02None of it.
03:03All right?
03:03I have my own fucking life.
03:05Okay?
03:12Now I'm taking my eggplant parmesan to go.
03:17I'm so fucking hungry.
03:23Hey, nice save, sweetheart.
03:25Wouldn't want to see you bruise that sweet ass.
03:31Go fuck yourself, you fucking animal.
03:34You think I want to hear that shit from your limp dick?
03:36Huh?
03:36Why don't you go crawl back into the port-a-potty you call at home, you fucking filthy animal?
03:40Piece of shit.
03:42Jesus!
03:44She must be on a period.
03:46I am!
03:47Fuck you!
