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Taskmaster S22E03
Döküm
00:02Ticket please!
00:05Oh!
00:09This isn't my fault!
00:12Oh my god!
00:14Oh my god!
00:19Let me help.
00:21Mum?
00:21Ah!
00:35Welcome!
00:36Welcome to Taskmaster.
00:38Comedians facing mounting pressure
00:40to prove that they are in some way capable.
00:43Fear not, all five are committed
00:45to stick it out because of their zeal,
00:47their tenacity, and crucially,
00:49the legally binding contract
00:50that they signed.
00:51We own their asses!
00:55Not sure where that came from.
00:57Please welcome...
00:58Chloe Pair!
01:00Izzy Fetty!
01:03Maruka!
01:05Nina Ponty!
01:07And Richard Ayawade!
01:12And beside me, a man who I have worked
01:14closely with for over a decade,
01:16and I'm proud now to call my furry pet.
01:19Run for the stick, good boy!
01:21Catch Daddy's stick!
01:24LAUGHTER
01:27It didn't Alex Horne!
01:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
01:31OK.
01:33Thank you.
01:34Nice to be here.
01:35Hello, Greg.
01:36Hello, good boy.
01:37Hello.
01:38Would you like to see some special photos?
01:40Oh, here we go.
01:41Yep.
01:42Oh!
01:43They're photos.
01:45They're...
01:46They're special photos.
01:48Fake...
01:48Fake clothes, yeah.
01:50LAUGHTER
01:51There's more!
01:52LAUGHTER
01:53A funny little laugh.
01:56Right then, the prize task.
01:58What have I got to judge this time?
01:59This time, they've each brought in the thing
02:01that makes them feel safest.
02:03Yes.
02:04I know, it's nice to feel safe.
02:06I always feel safest when I shut my eyes.
02:08Although I always feel very vulnerable when I shut my eyes.
02:11And that's why I always wink at policemen.
02:14LAUGHTER
02:15Meanwhile, this episode's winner will go home with
02:17five things that should make them feel safer than a safe
02:20inside a branch of Safeway.
02:23Matt Lucas, what makes you feel safe?
02:26Well, I thought my mum.
02:28Ah.
02:28So I brought my mum in.
02:30LAUGHTER
02:32Diana's here.
02:33Yes, she's here.
02:34So the winner wins some time with Diana?
02:37No, they just win my mum.
02:39LAUGHTER
02:40They can just keep her?
02:41Yeah.
02:41I mean, we've, you know, we've had a good run together.
02:44LAUGHTER
02:45OK, well, here is Matt's mum that someone's going to win.
02:48There you go.
02:49Aww.
02:50And she's in the audience?
02:51She's in the audience.
02:52She's sitting just over there.
02:53Hello, Diana.
02:54Hello.
02:56Hello.
02:56APPLAUSE
02:58Chloe, what could she feel safe?
03:01As a quite... a fairly tall person,
03:03I never get the opportunity to be Little Spoon.
03:07LAUGHTER
03:08So I have made a life-size model of you...
03:12LAUGHTER
03:12..to spoon me at night.
03:15LAUGHTER
03:16The hole, Greg.
03:18LAUGHTER
03:20APPLAUSE
03:27It's like you were in my dressing room.
03:30LAUGHTER
03:30Well, erm, you were in my dressing room five minutes ago.
03:34Next photo, please.
03:34Here we go.
03:35Yeah!
03:37LAUGHTER
03:38And every time I came out of the bathroom,
03:40I forgot you were there.
03:41Oh, Jesus Christ!
03:43LAUGHTER
03:43Listen, it's incredible.
03:46LAUGHTER
03:47Now, Izzy, what have you brought in that makes you feel safe?
03:49So I'm not the world's most natural driver,
03:54so I've chosen a seatbelt.
03:56Oh!
03:57Here is Izzy's seatbelt
03:58that the winners can strap themselves in with.
04:00It's a standard seatbelt.
04:02OK.
04:02When I get into sticky situations,
04:04I like to use my initiative to try and solve them
04:08and it sometimes damages the car.
04:10LAUGHTER
04:11Erm, I bought some paint, but, erm,
04:15and I put it on the passenger seat
04:16and I was driving along
04:17and it set off the passenger seatbelt alarm
04:20because it...
04:21the weight of it made the car think
04:22there was someone sitting in the seat
04:23without their seatbelt on.
04:25So, when it got to a red light,
04:27I just knocked the tin onto the floor.
04:31LAUGHTER
04:31But the lid immediately came open
04:33and within about three seconds
04:35the footwell was full of blue paint.
04:37Mm.
04:39Erm...
04:39LAUGHTER
04:40I...
04:41What?
04:42Is that...?
04:43What?
04:44No, I don't think it's typical woman.
04:47LAUGHTER
04:51So sorry.
04:53Nina.
04:54Hello.
04:54What makes you feel safe?
04:55I have, er...
04:57Well, it's non-transferable safeness, this.
05:00It wouldn't make anyone else feel safe.
05:02But if you're a ventriloquist,
05:04people like to see you...
05:07..drink and talk at the same time.
05:10That's a normal cup.
05:12LAUGHTER
05:13And then I put water in it.
05:15Oh, I'm scared.
05:17Then I can drink this water
05:19and I can keep talking all the time
05:22whilst also drinking
05:23without dying.
05:25And that makes me feel...
05:27..very safe.
05:29APPLAUSE
05:30Incredible, Nina,
05:31cos I've seen your act many times
05:33and you're an absolutely brilliant,
05:35talented ventriloquist,
05:36but that was rubbish.
05:37LAUGHTER
05:39What have you brought in, Nina?
05:41Slush powder.
05:42It's just very specialist information.
05:44And what does the slush powder do?
05:45It solidifies the water
05:47in the cup that you saw me pour in.
05:49Oh, I see.
05:50Then I can drink,
05:51but without drinking.
05:53Thank you.
05:53Hello, Richard.
05:54I have a personal...
05:57..portaloo.
05:58LAUGHTER
05:58Erm, thank you.
06:00Here is Richard's portaloo.
06:02That comes with me.
06:04LAUGHTER
06:04Are you fine if I tell Greg
06:06that you probably wee more than any contestant
06:08we've ever had?
06:08I'm almost a public urinal sat-nav.
06:11I don't care where you are in London,
06:12I'm going to be able to tell you
06:13the nearest place to go to the toilet.
06:15Trafalgar Square.
06:16Just straight in the fountain.
06:19LAUGHTER
06:23APPLAUSE
06:25Are you sure I'd give the points?
06:26Yeah, what makes you feel least safe out of those things?
06:28Well, I think I'm probably being a bit mean to Izzy.
06:31The seatbelt makes her feel safe.
06:33Well, wouldn't you like to go in a car...
06:35With you?
06:37Yeah.
06:37No.
06:37Izzy, one point. OK.
06:39Mini gets two.
06:40Richard, three.
06:42Seems fair.
06:42Four points to Big Greg Spoon
06:44because there's a human being here
06:46and obviously I'm going to give Diana five points.
06:49Simple as that.
06:50There, it's over.
06:50There's five points for Matt Plum.
06:52APPLAUSE
06:53Very good.
06:54May we see a task now, please?
06:56Yes, it's time to learn a new word.
06:58Here we go.
07:13Hello.
07:15Hello.
07:15Hi.
07:16Hello, Matt.
07:19Hello, Alex.
07:19Chloe.
07:24Here she is.
07:25Here she is.
07:26She is here.
07:31Does that say gleek, Alex?
07:35Gleek.
07:36Gleek.
07:37Gleek.
07:38Fastest wins.
07:39I know that's a word in Shakespeare
07:41because I played bottom in Midsummer Night's Dream once
07:44and there was a thing about gleeking on occasion
07:46but I can't remember what it means.
07:48You may not use the internet
07:49but you may make two phone calls as long as you only yell.
07:53and the phone calls last no more than 30 seconds each.
07:57What the hell?
08:00Your time starts now and stops when you say that you have gleeked.
08:05Do you know what a gleek is?
08:06No.
08:06As in, like, someone who likes the TV show Glee?
08:10No.
08:10Gleek.
08:11Gleek.
08:13That's Greg going to the toilet.
08:15It's a new set one.
08:16Well, I'm racking it down.
08:17What's your number?
08:25Gleek.
08:27Gleek.
08:28I like the definitions of gleek.
08:30Is it someone who likes glee a lot?
08:32Lovely.
08:33It's a gleek, yeah.
08:34That is common parlance for someone that likes gleek.
08:36Richard suggested it's a phrase from me going to the toilet.
08:40A G-leek.
08:41Thank you.
08:41Four times a night.
08:42I'm puffed up like a crab down there.
08:44Yeah.
08:45I would say, though, that Matt was right.
08:48That one definition of gleek is from Shakespeare in A Midsummer Night's Dream.
08:51I shall gleek upon occasion, I think he says.
08:54And that meant to scoff or mock, but none of you did that.
08:57There are other meanings of gleek, which they were to find out with their phone calls.
09:01I'm ready to gleek, I think.
09:03Well, we're going to start the gleek streak with Izzy and Matty.
09:09Is it like a call thing? Like a young person's thing?
09:13I think young people can do it.
09:16I'm going to call my husband.
09:17OK.
09:18He's younger than me.
09:19Yeah.
09:19Flip.
09:21I've got to call someone.
09:26Hello.
09:27Ellis, it's me.
09:29Can you tell me what gleeking is?
09:31Spelled G-L-E-E-K.
09:35Hello?
09:36Hello, I need your help.
09:37I'm doing a task for Taskmaster when I have to yell and I have to call someone and I have
09:43to ask them what the word gleek means.
09:47You are on speakerphone.
09:48This is my friend Nathan.
09:50I don't know if you can help me, Nathan, or not, but I'm against the clock.
09:54Hello, is that a complete?
09:55Yes.
09:56OK.
09:56But we've only got about 20 seconds.
09:5815.
09:5915.
09:59Hello, Ellis.
10:00Alex says hello.
10:01Hello, Alex.
10:03I've got five seconds left.
10:05The time is running out.
10:07Oh, shit.
10:10That didn't work very well.
10:11Can I call him back?
10:12You've got two phone calls.
10:13Oh, right.
10:14OK.
10:15I've got 30 seconds left.
10:17Involuntary speaking.
10:19Involuntary what?
10:21It is the voluntary accidental projection of a saliva stream from the submandula glands under
10:28Please hang up.
10:54Please hang up.
10:58Well, I think I would encourage you to leave now.
11:00I'm going to leave.
11:03Oh, well, well.
11:04Thank you.
11:10It's funny that you ran out of time, Matt, because it's not like you gave too much detail.
11:14Well, no, but...
11:14You're one step away from going, I'm wearing a blue jumper.
11:17Yeah, I know that.
11:18I spoke to my friend afterwards and he still told me that at the end of that first call,
11:23he believed I was in the street and I'd been attacked.
11:27What, and this was code?
11:28Yeah.
11:29I think the big question for me is, did either of these two people gleek?
11:33Hmm.
11:33It's meant to be involuntary.
11:35Well, Matt attempted to disguise the fact that there was saliva coming from his mouth,
11:39so I think there was an attempt at creating a gleek.
11:42Mm-hm.
11:43Is he?
11:45It was involuntary.
11:46I put it to you, you simply flobbed at Alex.
11:49LAUGHTER
11:51If it's spraying from under the tongue from the salivary glands, that's gleeking.
11:55All right.
11:56Neither of them gleeked, but I would say Matt's attempt to disguise his spitting at you
12:00was slightly more valid than Izzy's, that's all I would say.
12:03Well, we've had Izzy Splotty and Matt Mucus, now it's time for Chloe Spits.
12:08I'm going to call Ed Gamble, it's his birthday.
12:10Oh.
12:11He should be in a good mood.
12:13PHONE RINGS
12:14Hello, Ed.
12:15Hello, Ed, it's me, Chloe!
12:17Happy birthday!
12:19PHONE RINGS
12:20Thanks, Brad!
12:21You're welcome, Rat!
12:22We only have 20 seconds to...
12:24All right.
12:24Do you know what a gleek is?
12:27No.
12:27Look it up really quickly and then text me.
12:29Gleek.
12:30G-L-E-E-K.
12:32OK.
12:35He's put squirting spit out from under your tongue.
12:39Is he taking the piss out of me?
12:41I don't know.
12:45Right.
12:47OK.
12:53Oh, jeez!
12:58It's...
12:59It's not fucking worked out there, I swear!
13:05Oh!
13:07We're a gleek!
13:08Yeah, Alex!
13:09We're a gleek!
13:10Well, it's up to you if you're saying he's gleek.
13:13I've given you multiple gleeks there.
13:15That's got the clock.
13:16Well, thank you so much.
13:17Happy birthday, Ed.
13:18Sorry about that.
13:22Wow!
13:28Why did you know to just immediately leave the lab?
13:30Had you seen that big syringe somewhere?
13:32I just sort of knew if I shouted,
13:34I need a big syringe into the air,
13:35it would appear to me in the Taskmaster house.
13:37It's just that kind of magic, the Taskmaster house.
13:39Yeah.
13:40Yeah.
13:41Yes.
13:41Yes.
13:41I don't want to gleek on your parade,
13:44but that wasn't saliva that came out.
13:47You're being a little bitch right now, man.
13:49Yeah.
13:51OK, I think we're going to go for a break, but first...
13:58That is one of the most distressing things I've ever seen.
14:02What an awful time to go to a break.
14:05Oh, my God!
14:06I hate you!
14:08OK.
14:17Hello!
14:19Welcome back to Taskmaster.
14:20This series has a Greek theme,
14:23and right now there's a bleak scene involving a gleek sheen
14:27in a previously chic, clean lab.
14:29Alex?
14:30Great phrasing, Greg.
14:31Yes, it's a simple task.
14:32Fastest to gleek wins.
14:34And now for the final two attempts,
14:36it's Nina Margarita Conti,
14:38which is her genuine middle name,
14:40and Richard Long Island Iced Tea Iowadi.
14:44Gosh, I don't have Richard Osman's number.
14:48He's the only person who would probably know this off-head.
14:50I've got his number.
14:51Good.
14:52Could I have it?
14:53OK.
14:54Your time starts now and stops when you have gleek.
14:58Is that when your saliva comes out?
15:01How did you know that?
15:02I've heard that word.
15:04Can you gleek?
15:05No, I'm not a lizard.
15:10What do you do?
15:12Come on, Osman.
15:14Bloody Osman.
15:16Bloody hell.
15:18What is that?
15:19I've never heard...
15:21Nobody goes through to an answer phone.
15:27Oh, my God.
15:30Ah!
15:31I might be gleeking, you know.
15:33But you want it to spurt.
15:34It's got to spurt.
15:37GLEEK!
15:39I'm full of saliva.
15:41Tim Keyes.
15:43OK.
15:45He's probably not like me at Izzy.
15:47No.
15:49Key, you bastard!
15:51Can you look up the word gleek?
15:53G-L-E-E-K.
15:56Then call me back ASAP telling me what it means.
16:01I'm done.
16:02Yep.
16:03What did he say?
16:04I don't know.
16:05He sounded pissed.
16:07I'll just text any progress.
16:08Yeah.
16:09Any progress.
16:12It's a card game.
16:13It's a card game.
16:14Right.
16:15Could you get some cards for me, please, Alex?
16:16Sure.
16:17What are you going to do with them?
16:17I'm going to gleek.
16:21Come on.
16:23GLEEK, BITCH!
16:25He keeps on in one second.
16:28Oh, I see.
16:29Some cards.
16:30Apparently that's what it is.
16:31Spitting while yawning.
16:32From under the tongue, like a cat.
16:35I think we're in...
16:36Are we in a fetish scenario for you?
16:39Are we in one of your fetishes?
17:01I think I've leaked, you know.
17:03Yeah?
17:03I think I've leaked a lot.
17:05All right.
17:06Thank you for having me.
17:07No, thank you.
17:08I'm terribly sorry.
17:09Okay.
17:11Free.
17:11Three cards are the same rank.
17:12Mm-hm.
17:13Two.
17:14I've leaked.
17:15Okay.
17:15Tim Key, again, he says you want to be shooting spit from under your tongue.
17:18I just feel this is just for him now.
17:21Well, it's nice to watch you, GLEEK.
17:23Okay.
17:25All right.
17:32Why did you know what to GLEEK means?
17:34I don't know.
17:35I can't tell you where I learnt all the words I know.
17:40Did Richard GLEEK?
17:41Well, so Tim Key told you about the popular English card game
17:46from the 16th and 17th centuries, which is GLEEK-ing.
17:49Thank you.
17:49It was a slightly more dignified GLEEK than others, but yeah.
17:51Well, I suspected at first you were making up the card game GLEEK
17:55just to get out of doing something vaguely humiliating,
17:57as I increasingly think is your M.O. in life.
18:01There's a real nasty hostility creeping out of me.
18:07Look, this is the way I'm going to score it.
18:09Okay.
18:09One point to Izzy Sooty because it wasn't a real GLEEK.
18:12Oh, my God.
18:12Two points to math because it was a fairly badly acted attempt at an involuntary GLEEK.
18:17How dare you?
18:19Nice.
18:20Because I find.
18:22Chloe's GLEEK was a fake GLEEK, but there was a lot of preparation
18:25and a lot of attempts to make it look like a GLEEK.
18:34is another form of GLEEK-ing.
18:35The only proper involuntary GLEEK I saw was Nina Conti.
18:38She takes five points.
18:39Well, she was as fast as Richard was as fast as Nina gets five points.
18:42APPLAUSE
18:47Just to clarify, Nina took seven minutes, 25.
18:50Richard, nine minutes, 27.
18:51Chloe, 12 minutes, 25.
18:52So it would be five, four, three if we're discounting these,
18:55but you are giving two points to me.
18:56I am giving them points.
18:57It was an attempt at a GLEEK-ish.
18:59Can we see the scoreboard, please?
19:00Of course.
19:01Er...
19:02Whoa!
19:03It's my sort of scoreboard.
19:04We've got Izzy in last place with two,
19:06but all the others have got seven points.
19:09Oh, I like that.
19:11Look at that.
19:13Ooh.
19:17Let's fire up another.
19:18All right, then.
19:19Say cheese.
19:21Cheese.
19:34How are you?
19:36I'm good, thank you.
19:37Yeah.
19:39You're not going to ask me how I am?
19:40Oh, yeah.
19:40Yeah, yeah.
19:41So how are you?
19:42Yeah, fine.
19:45Shall I read this, Taz?
19:47Yeah.
19:51Take a pair of photos.
19:53One before and one after something happening.
19:56The before and after photos that most make the taskmaster want to see what happened in between wins.
20:04Win, actually, it should be, because photos are plural.
20:10There are two bonus points for the most unexpected thing that happened in between the photos.
20:15You have 15 minutes, your time starts now.
20:19Erm...
20:20Gosh.
20:22Erm...
20:23Yeah, I'm wondering if it's going to be something like, I'm, like, dry in one and then I'm, like, wet
20:28in a very unexpected way.
20:29Mm-hm.
20:31And is it really 15 minutes?
20:33Yes.
20:36Greg like more cerebral stuff or does he like clumsy, like, panto shit?
20:43The clumsy panto shit, what he likes.
20:45He likes that stuff.
20:46I would have thought so.
20:47You think?
20:48I don't know him very well.
20:53APPLAUSE
20:59Greg genuinely hadn't seen these pictures.
21:01Greg doesn't know what's happening between.
21:02I haven't.
21:03We're going to start with Chloe.
21:04So this is the before photo that Chloe took.
21:08LAUGHTER
21:09And this is the after.
21:12LAUGHTER
21:13Aw!
21:20How intrigued are you about what happened between these two pictures?
21:24Yeah, I'm pretty intrigued.
21:26OK.
21:26Let's see if this satisfies your curiosity.
21:29If you just look in here and give me a big smile, cos you're so happy.
21:34Oh!
21:36Lovely!
21:38Oh!
21:41OK, now...
21:44I just made you this.
21:47OK?
21:49Is that nice?
21:51Do I breathe in?
21:53Yeah, breathe in.
21:54Nice and deep.
21:56OK.
21:57Now I'm going to read you some facts.
22:00One day, you won't know who wins the Premier League.
22:03Your dog doesn't understand why you left this morning.
22:06One day will be the last time you pick up your child.
22:10It may have already happened.
22:11Time is constantly passing, meaning you have less life to live every passing second.
22:16Over the last three decades, the world has lost half of its coral reefs.
22:20If a sheep is not sheared, the weight of its wool will cause the sheep to fall over.
22:26One day, someone will speak your name for the last time.
22:30Oh!
22:34Wow!
22:36Good.
22:39Good.
22:41Good.
22:44It's happening a little bit now, honestly.
22:47It's strong, because I thought it was just, you know, seeing you in tears.
22:51I thought it was just going to be a novelty way of making you in tears.
22:54And that was confirmed when the onion mask came out.
22:57But the addition of the genuine emotion.
22:59Oh, yeah.
23:00Yeah.
23:01Lovely work.
23:01It can never just be an onion beard.
23:05You're right.
23:06How can it be?
23:07I knew you wouldn't accept just onion beard.
23:09I would have been disappointed by onion beards.
23:11But when you start telling me that if you don't shear a sheep,
23:14the weight of its wool will make it fall over.
23:17I was fine with the sheep.
23:18But it was the dog not understanding why I left this morning.
23:21And picking up my...
23:22Picking up my children for the last time.
23:23Who are...
23:24They're both...
23:25Well, all three...
23:25Oh, there are three, actually, now.
23:26But, um...
23:32It doesn't matter.
23:33How old is the youngest child?
23:3513 and a half.
23:35Oh, OK.
23:38It's the 13 years to get that one lodged in your head, is it?
23:41Yeah.
23:42Yeah, three, yeah.
23:42Wow.
23:43It's a strong start.
23:45Can it be beaten?
23:45Let's see.
23:46OK, well, let's see Izzy's before photo.
23:48Have a look at this, Greg.
23:49Yeah.
23:50Ooh.
23:51And then the after photo is this.
23:56How on earth did all those animals and those barrels get in the bath?
24:02Well, I hope that the video is not just Izzy putting those things on top of it.
24:09LAUGHTER
24:11That's all I have.
24:13So, how did that get to that?
24:15LAUGHTER
24:16Let's have a look, shall we?
24:17Let's have a look.
24:19Are you having a nice bath, Alex?
24:21Yes, thank you.
24:22Yeah.
24:23Good.
24:23I like a public bath.
24:25Nothing could go wrong.
24:31LAUGHTER
24:42Great.
24:44APPLAUSE
24:48She animated the animal attack and gave them emotions.
24:52There were heavy eyebrows there.
24:54Really angry animals.
24:55Real nice.
24:56So, do I win?
24:59LAUGHTER
25:00You don't win, no, but I do think you're going to do a lot better
25:03than you have so far today.
25:06LAUGHTER
25:07Unless...
25:07LAUGHTER
25:08Well, let's see Nina's before.
25:09Nina's is better.
25:10Let's have a look at Nina's before photo.
25:13Oh.
25:14Just a cup of tea and a sandwich.
25:15And then, this happened.
25:18LAUGHTER
25:18Oh.
25:19I'm quite intrigued.
25:21She's just been in the car with Izzy Satie.
25:24LAUGHTER
25:26Yeah, that's good.
25:28That's good.
25:28That is good.
25:30Intrigued by how that happened?
25:32I really am genuinely intrigued by how that happened.
25:35OK.
25:36Well, it wasn't easy, but this is how this happened.
25:51You look normal.
25:55Good luck.
25:57I'm scared.
25:58I'm scared.
26:00Ah!
26:03Ah!
26:05Ah!
26:06Ah!
26:06Ah!
26:07Ah!
26:07Oooooooo!
26:09Oh, my God!
26:11Oh, my God!
26:17LAUGHTER
26:18Thank you for wearing the, er, flippers, too.
26:22LAUGHTER
26:26It's...it's unexpected.
26:27APPLAUSE
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35:36Wow
35:37That was pretty fast wasn't it?
35:39Felt fast
35:40Food
35:42Food
35:45Salt
35:46Bananas
35:46Oh my life is bad
35:49All I can do is hotdog
35:51You saying hotdog?
35:52Yeah
35:52Carrot
35:54Let me play again
35:55Alright
36:01That's where I was going to go
36:02I have to go to six
36:08Yes, get in
36:10Oh, one, two, three, you've won again
36:12Thank you
36:12So the task is over if you get this question correct
36:15Please name an adjective
36:17Woozie
36:20Please tell me a sound
36:32I can't remember what I put
36:36A bark
36:37No, it was a sneeze
36:38Off we go again
36:38Oh, I hate this life
36:40Number six
36:41You went over here
36:46One, two, three, yep you've won
36:48Oh yeah, go on
36:49Now you just have to tell me
36:52A bird
36:53Finch
36:53Correct
36:54Hey
36:56You're very good at this
36:57I was passable
37:07So
37:08What I would say Nina is you must be thrilled with that textbook
37:12You won
37:13You said soup
37:14I said soup
37:15You left
37:16Yes
37:16It was mainly a test of memory and throwing crosses accurately
37:19Chloe was the cleverest because your numbers were one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine
37:23You thought this was going to be relevant later on
37:24The rest put their answers pretty randomly
37:26However, Nina was far quicker than you, Chloe
37:29What surprised me was that we'd filled in the Bosnak form a mere two hours before that task
37:35It wasn't that Matt forgot what was on the Bosnak form
37:38He forgot that he filled it in
37:39Yeah
37:40That is fairly terrifying
37:42I don't know where I am now
37:45Do you need your mum?
37:46Yeah, if only she was here
37:52Right, it's time for a quick ad break
37:54And then just one part left to go
37:56Matt's mum is standing by to make the winner feel safe
38:00And Richard's port-a-loo's there in case they need to have a plop
38:03See you soon
38:12Hello! Welcome back to the final part of the show
38:16Where our cast are participating in a game of knots and crosses
38:19Yes, as we always say, Greg, save the budget, have a nice holiday
38:24Finally then, let's test the memories of Richard and Izzy
38:28Two great comedians who were in two great sitcoms just a couple of decades ago
38:35You're going first, your old self, and you went there
38:38Some part of my wrist has got to touch the chair
38:40Yeah, yeah
38:42That's just on there
38:44Yeah
38:44Your old self went here
38:49Right, are you still sitting?
38:51Yeah, I think so
38:52Were you?
39:21Yes
39:22Do you want to play it again?
39:23Yes
39:30You pushed it
39:32What are you talking about?
39:33I've won
39:34Old self went there as number seven
39:36Got a chance here, is he?
39:38Yeah, come on Iz
39:42Please give me a time
39:461923
39:47That's incorrect, we have to play again
39:50It was a time though, wasn't it?
39:52It wasn't that time
39:53It was a time, you asked me for a time
39:56This is gaslighting
39:57If you give a different answer, you must start again
40:01Oh
40:05Okay, so you've won the game
40:06Now you have to answer the same question the same way
40:09Please say a number
40:13Nine
40:14Correct
40:15Impressive
40:16Thank you
40:17There
40:21I'm going to ask you for a food
40:23If I say pass, you've got to ask me another question
40:26That is not true
40:27Pass
40:28That's correct
40:28You did not like pass
40:29Have you seen Mastermind?
40:30No, it's Mastermind
40:31Okay, it really works
40:33If you pass, you go to the next question
40:35Mmm
40:40Oh, congratulations
40:41Three in a row
40:42Thank you
40:43I'm going to ask for a place
40:46Place
40:47Mm-hmm
40:59Pass
40:59Pass
41:04Great, yeah, well done
41:05Thank you
41:06Please could you tell me a bird
41:14Crane
41:15Congratulations
41:16You've won Noughts and Crosses
41:19Would you have got the colour?
41:24Did I say red?
41:24You said vermilion
41:26That's a shame
41:35Is he was pretty quick I think
41:37Yes she was
41:38Yes
41:39I'd like to raise something though
41:41Please
41:41So the same thing happened to me and Richard
41:43It went sort of to the edge
41:44And I accepted your authority
41:48Yeah
41:48Whereas Richard challenged your authority
41:50And you kind of like let him off
41:52You are aware Richard was very slow and you were very fast
41:56I'm really pleased that Richard had a go
41:58Okay
42:01But I mean I think you're right to point it out
42:03And it's no more complicated than old-fashioned misogyny
42:11Richard?
42:12I knew Alex was an ally
42:13Yeah
42:18Can I tell you what his sound was in the quiz first of all?
42:21Tell me what his sound was
42:22I know his colour was vermilion
42:23Colour vermilion
42:24Sound
42:25Despair
42:25Okay
42:30So points wise it's pretty simple
42:33It just goes by the time
42:34Nina was the quickest
42:35Five points for her 45 seconds
42:37Izzy gets four points
42:38One minute 42
42:39Three to Chloe
42:40Two minutes 18
42:40Matt
42:41Two points
42:42Five minutes 40
42:43And Richard
42:44Eighteen minutes 30 seconds
42:45One point
42:46There we go
42:47Five points
42:48Tenina
42:53All right, everyone
42:55Please make your way to the stage for the final task of the show!
43:07Who's going to read the task out, you silly boy?
43:09Richard is going to read the task
43:10I'll bring them down
43:15Get all the red rolls on your left pole
43:19The yellow rolls on your middle pole
43:21And the green rolls on your right pole
43:24Only one roll may leave the poles at any time
43:28Also, you must be waving at the taskmaster with one hand
43:33Throughout the task
43:35Fastest winds
43:36Your time starts on the whistle
43:38Hello, Matt
43:39Yeah, what happens if you're colour blind?
43:42You asked us last week as well
43:44And we established you weren't
43:45Yeah
43:46Well, I'm not, but
43:48That doesn't
43:51Richard's got a question
43:52Can we keep these holders after the show?
43:55Yes, you can, Richard
43:56For the third show in a row
43:57You can keep all the props
44:00Good luck
44:02And wave
44:02Wave
44:03And move
44:05Wave
44:05Up
44:07What do you mean?
44:12What are you doing?
44:13What are you all doing?
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