I Lied About What The House Cost Me | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 49) - video Dailymotion

Lerin Gaines

I Lied About What The House Cost Me | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 49)   "Where Everyday Conversations Lead to Financial Awareness"   Featuring: Wisdom Wednesday, Mentorship Series   Wednesday | August 19th, 2026   Broadcasting on all social media platforms @LERINGAINES   https://leringaines.com  https://linktr.ee/leringaines  https://www.facebook.com/leringaines  http://instagram.com/leringaines  https://www.tiktok.com/@leringaines  http://twitter.com/leringaines  https://www.youtube.com/@leringaines  https://www.twitch.tv/leringaines  https://kick.com/leringaines  https://dailymotion.com/LerinGaines   Song of The Day: "Living In Confusion" by Phyllis Hyman  Released 1991 | Prime of My Life   Burning Questions for Reflections!  Are you purchasing what you can technically qualify for, or what you can responsibly sustain?   Share your response to tonight's Burning Questions...  Text: (609) 200-1098 | Email: Info@LerinGaines.com   DM on any social media platform @LERINGAINES (Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, YouTube, KICK, Twitch, DailyMotion)   Check out my FREE Monthly digital Newsletter 'Whispers of Wisdom' for updates, exclusives, and inspiration!   #Facebook #Instagram #TikTok #X #YouTube #KICK #Twitch #DailyMotion #DebtFreeLiving #FinancialCoach #LerinGaines #411Podcast #BurningQuestions #BlackDiamondConsultations #VacationWithMe #WhispersofWisdom #DISC6 #Vitality   DISCLAIMER: The content and information provided by Black Diamond Consultations are intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. We do not guarantee the accuracy or completeness of the materials, and any reliance you place on them is strictly at your own risk. Our content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice or judgment. Black Diamond Consultations shall not be liable for any errors or omissions in the educational and entertainment content or for any actions taken based on the information provided.   411 PODCAST  DISC 6: Vitality  Track 49: I Lied About What The House Cost Me  ©️ 2026 Black Diamond Consultations Network  LerinGaines.com

Transcript

04:30So grab your journal, open your mind, and prepare to go beyond the surface.

04:35Here, we don't just talk, we transform lives.

04:38And now, here's your guide through it all, entrepreneur, mentor, and financial coach, Laren Gaines.

04:59All right, all right, all right, all right, what's going on, what's going on, y'all?

05:03So welcome, welcome, welcome on in to another episode of the 411 Podcast.

05:11We are here on episode 49.

05:15I lied about what the house cost me.

05:19You lied about what the house cost you.

05:24We're going to get into it tonight.

05:26It's going to be a great episode.

05:28We're going to speak about housing costs and what it's like to be a homeowner for all

05:36of you out there who are homeowners and for the people out there that want to be homeowners.

05:44We're going to speak about that tonight.

05:46I want to say good morning to everybody out there, especially you out there on Facebook.

05:52I appreciate y'all checking us out first thing in the morning.

05:56Thank you so much to that.

05:58Um, please do me a favor.

06:01Please hit that like button.

06:02That's the best thing that you can do.

06:05Subscribe, tag a friend, text a friend.

06:09Most importantly, please go ahead and share this podcast out.

06:14Repost this podcast wherever you listen to your podcast at.

06:18I want to say thank you so much.

06:21We had a very great episode last week of Wisdom Wednesday, and we're going to continue the

06:27momentum tonight.

06:29But before we do this, I have to go ahead and give a very special thank you to my executive

06:34producer.

06:35I want to thank God for giving me another opportunity to come out here and podcast, come out here

06:41and give you all a great show.

06:45Without him, none of this will be possible.

06:47And without each and every one of you out there listening in, letting me know what your

06:52comments are, DMing me, texting me, please drop it in the comments.

06:59Let me know where you are calling from.

07:03And on that note, let's go ahead and get right on into one of my favorite segments of the

07:11show, Song of the Day.

07:23Now, I had to take my time because usually about once or twice a year, I get into this

07:31Anita Baker thing where I'm just on Anita Baker for like a week straight, usually around the

07:38fall.

07:39For some reason, around the fall time, I just want to listen to some Anita Baker.

07:44But I picked Phyllis Hyman, and this was one of my favorite songs off of her album Prime

07:52of My Life, 1991, Living in Confusion.

07:56I was like 11 years old.

07:58I don't even know what this record was about.

08:00But for some reason, I just love Phyllis Hyman, her voice, and this song was just in heavy

08:07rotation during that time frame.

08:10Living in Confusion.

08:12I think about living in confusion, and I think about my life.

08:16I don't know who I'm speaking to.

08:17I'm only speaking from real life experiences.

08:20But when I was living in confusion, I blamed everybody else.

08:25All of the confusion, all of the nonsense, all of the drama that I had going on in my life.

08:31I somehow found a way to blame everybody else, and I never took responsibility for my own

08:36decisions and my actions.

08:39So, we're on this thing.

08:41We're going to speak about homeownership.

08:43We're going to speak about, you know, the cost that it takes to own a home.

08:48And we could even take it beyond that, just the lifestyle that some of us, you know, have created.

08:55You create your own environment.

08:56You create your own world.

08:59But it comes with a cost.

09:02And with that being said, some of us are living in so much confusion.

09:07But I want to know, are you taking responsibility?

09:09Are you accountable for all of the confusion and all of the drama and all of the hell that you

09:16have caused?

09:18Because it's so easy to blame somebody else when we're living in confusion.

09:23It's so easy to point fingers.

09:26I'll take it there.

09:27Why did you have to move in?

09:31What made you go ahead and sign that lease agreement with somebody that you barely even knew?

09:38Why did you have to go and get a brand new car when the used car that you had was

09:44working just fine?

09:46That's a, you know, married joint just fine.

09:48But everything was just fine.

09:50But you wanted to upgrade because you got a promotion on the job.

09:55So the extra $2,000 to $4,000 that you got a year was enough to sustain and keep you

10:04in a good position.

10:05But because you got that raise, now you upgraded your life and created not $2,000 to $4,000 worth

10:13of debt.

10:14You added on maybe about $6,000.

10:17And you wonder why you cannot get ahead.

10:20Ladies and gentlemen, that is called the lifestyle creep.

10:23See, if you just maintain exactly where you were, when God gives you increase, if you know how to manage

10:30it properly, you will be okay.

10:33Again, I don't know who I'm speaking to.

10:35I'm only speaking from real life experiences.

10:37But every time I received increase after begging, after crying, after pleading, God, please help me get out of this.

10:45I promise that I won't do this and I won't do that.

10:48And the first thing that I did was run out and, you know, get more consumer debt.

10:55Add something else to the credit card.

10:57Get another bill.

10:59So, that was confusion.

11:02And, again, blaming everybody else, not taking responsibility, not holding myself accountable, just living in confusion.

11:11But then something happened and I realized that God does not give us the spirit of confusion.

11:19That doesn't come from him.

11:21God doesn't confuse you.

11:23That's from the enemy.

11:25So, for those of us living in confusion, if anything is confusing to you, trust and believe that it's not

11:32from the higher power.

11:35Now, that one right there was a game changer for me.

11:38Because God having given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

11:44So, if he wants us to be in our right mind frame, the other one doesn't.

11:51Because the other one likes to twist things around and make it seem that it's all good when it's just

11:58a quick path straight to hell.

12:02So, for those of you who might feel that it's just unbearable, it's too confusing, I can't figure it out,

12:10I don't know how I got here, I don't know how she got here, I don't know why he's still

12:15here.

12:18Think about it.

12:20We write our own stories.

12:23What you are experiencing today, there is no coincidence.

12:27None whatsoever.

12:29There are actions, there are steps, there are things that you took that led you down this path.

12:35And while we're out there enjoying life, going through the motions, signing the leases, getting the new apartments, buying the

12:45new clothes, cars, jewelry, whatever it is, we're not thinking about the cost that it's going to cost us.

12:55We're not thinking about all of the little nickels and dimes that are adding up.

13:02But in this world, the world that we live in today, some of us need all of the coins that

13:07we can possibly get.

13:12I'm going to just keep it there because I can continue to keep going on and on.

13:17But yeah, we don't live in confusion today.

13:20Because I remember that God having given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of

13:26sound mind.

13:26And that is one of my favorite scriptures because whenever I feel that something is just off, something is a

13:35little confusing, I might need to take a couple steps back and say, okay, listen, this doesn't sound right.

13:41This doesn't smell right because he doesn't want to make anything confusing.

13:47He wants to make it simple.

13:49He wants to make it of love, peace, joy.

13:52So all of that other extra stuff, fear, doubt, confusion, anxiety, stress, that has to be from the enemy.

13:59So before I go and make any type of major financial decisions in this world that I'm living in today,

14:06I have to ask myself, what is this going to bring?

14:10Is this going to bring love for myself for the decision that I make, peace, joy?

14:17Am I going to be happy?

14:18Am I going to be comfortable?

14:20Or five minutes after I make this decision, does the fear, does the anxiety, will the stress come?

14:27Will the doubt, will the confusion, wondering how in the heck am I going to pay this, that, the next,

14:32the other?

14:33No, don't live in confusion today.

14:36Be in your right frame of mind, the mind that he wants you to be in, that mindset, that sound

14:40mind.

14:42Remember, anything other than that, love, peace, joy, happiness.

14:47Anything other than that comes from the enemy.

14:52And I don't sign up for his plan today.

14:54Song of the day, living in confusion, by Phyllis Hyman, released in 1991, off of her album, Prime of My

15:04Life.

15:14I could have went in even more, but I decided not to.

15:18But I will say this here.

15:21Sometimes it comes in the form of people, too.

15:24Because, yeah, I talked about the materialistic things.

15:26But have you ever interacted with somebody and they just try to make things just so confusing?

15:33That thing right there really gets me.

15:36Because I have had interactions with people that can just be so simple, so calm, so cool, but yet they

15:45want to make it confusing.

15:46And I have had interactions with people that they want to make it so confusing that at the end of

15:52the discussion, they ended up confusing themselves.

15:56Remember, if you can't explain something on a third grade level, if you want to start adding in all these

16:02extra words and trying to make yourself sound so sophisticated and over the top, you've already lost the game.

16:11You should be able to explain something at a third grade level so that a third grader should be able

16:15to understand exactly what you were saying.

16:18All of this extra back and forth and trying to twist things around and confuse people and make yourself sound

16:24so intelligent and over the top.

16:28Nah, bruh. Missed me with all that today.

16:30I don't have time for that.

16:32But when I was thinking about that living in confusion, I just thought about how the few interactions that I

16:39have had with this specific individual, can't name people, maybe see me in a couple of years.

16:45But as of right now, can't do that because we don't want to have any issues.

16:51We don't want any smoke over here.

16:53But yeah, don't be trying to confuse people.

16:56You end up confusing yourself, making yourself look like a fool.

16:59And yeah, nah, we don't do that today.

17:03But yeah, we're here.

17:04We're up, ready to get right on into this episode tonight.

17:09And yeah, let's go ahead and reach out to Birdman313.

17:29What's going on?

17:31Hey, how's it going?

17:32It's going.

17:33It's going.

17:34How's it going out there?

17:36Oh, it's going.

17:38It's a lot of breaking up doing the, you know, what you were saying.

17:44I heard it was like breaking up.

17:46I didn't know if it was going to cut off.

17:47Then my screen went black.

17:49Now it's back on.

17:51You're still here.

17:53But I'm just saying I wanted to let you know just in case we have a little issue that we

17:59have to do like we did last time.

18:02You ain't living in confusion over there, are you?

18:06Oh, no.

18:09That was the song of the day, in case you didn't hear that, Phyllis Hyman.

18:13Oh, yeah.

18:13Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

18:14What you know about Phyllis Hyman?

18:17I listen to her a little bit, you know, but it's always been Sade for me.

18:22Yeah, now I do go.

18:24So, like I said, sometimes around this time frame, maybe in the fall.

18:30I remember last October I went in, but I'll listen to like Anita Baker for like a week straight.

18:35Yeah.

18:36Just keep it on shuffle.

18:38Sade is another one that I'll do that with.

18:41When I get into my mode every now and then, I just want to listen to Sade.

18:46So, speaking of that, since you brought her up, what is your favorite album of hers?

18:51Hey, I don't have anything she put out.

18:54It's fine with me.

18:55I don't, you know, that's crazy.

18:57Everybody asks me all the time.

18:58I know, I forgot that.

18:59What is your favorite?

19:00I don't have a favorite because I like it all.

19:05I forgot.

19:06I asked you about a couple artists, and we go down this path all the time.

19:10Yeah, I got you.

19:11Yes, yes, yes.

19:12All right.

19:13That's all right.

19:14You know, anyway, one thing is, it's hot, hot, hot here.

19:18It's been a hundred, you know, I mean.

19:21We went out to the park on three different occasions, and every time, it was a hundred

19:26degrees, but we walked in the shade, you know, just like everybody else around there, and

19:31got my little walk in.

19:33Man, I finally got a little bass tune for this song, thanks to one of my college classmates

19:44who told me what I should do, and I did that.

19:48I took her advice because she taught music, but she had a major stroke, so she hasn't really

19:55been able to do much lately, but she's still into her music, and she played piano, and she

20:01just, she basically told me, well, try this, and the day I tried it, and I'm like, oh, man,

20:08okay, because I took some time away, and I said, I take some time away, then when I get

20:12this one brew, I know I need to stick with it, so, you know, it's been good.

20:17There ain't no confusion.

20:18Ain't no confusion on my part.

20:21That's what's up.

20:22That's what's up.

20:23Yeah.

20:23It's about 80 degrees here, nice and muggy, and human, so.

20:30Well, like I said, it's 100, and it's going to be like that, at least, I know, to the end

20:35of the week, so.

20:37Well, yeah, bring all that good heat down here.

20:40We definitely could use all of that.

20:43I could, I could anyway.

20:45Yeah.

20:46Because y'all know what's getting ready to happen next month in September.

20:50For y'all.

20:53Yeah, that's right.

20:54That's right.

20:55Yeah.

20:58All right.

21:00So, oh, yeah, great episode last week.

21:03I really did enjoy.

21:04Ladies and gentlemen, please go back and watch the episode.

21:07I listened to it today, and I was like, that was a really good episode.

21:11We definitely went in.

21:13I felt good afterwards.

21:13I did.

21:14I felt really good about it.

21:16I even told my son, Mike, before, you know, it was played.

21:19I said, hey, man, it was really good this time.

21:22I said, I feel good about it.

21:23He said, well, that's good.

21:24You know, he said, I'm glad you really enjoyed it, and you and him both is hanging in there.

21:29And he said he's learned a lot from, he said, I learned a lot from listening to you, too.

21:33I'm like, yeah, okay, that's good.

21:35Yeah, yeah, that's good.

21:36That's good.

21:38All right.

21:39So now we're about to get into money hacks.

21:41So what number you got for us tonight?

21:4644.

21:4844.

21:48Oh, like the 44 Club, huh?

21:51Yeah.

21:52Never been there.

21:55Never been there.

21:56There's an area out here that only a few people, well, they call it 44 Acre Shaker.

22:02So, you know, everybody knows about 44 that lives out this way in the area.

22:08Hmm.

22:09Okay.

22:10This one's going to be interesting tonight.

22:11I'll do some justice on here.

22:14It says, consider a public service job as a way to reduce your student loan repayment.

22:20Work full time at a qualifying public service job.

22:23And after 10 years of on-time loan payments, any remaining balance will be forgiven.

22:30Dang, I did not know that.

22:31I didn't either.

22:33If you opt for this route, you obviously want to repay.

22:37You obviously want to use a repayment plan with a longer, not shorter repayment schedule.

22:43Okay, so basically what they're saying is, if you have a public service job, which we would need to dig

22:49a little deeper and find out what a public service job, what that would mean.

22:52But if you get a huge, big loan for, like, maybe your lawyers, your doctors, you know, when you're going

23:02to be in school for 10 years or whatever the case may be.

23:10Okay, so again, after working for 10 years at this public service job, if you apply properly, it'll be forgiven.

23:19Hmm.

23:20Hmm.

23:20Yeah, for real.

23:21Interesting.

23:22I had a public service job, and it didn't help me out none.

23:26You know what?

23:30Oh, my goodness.

23:33I don't know what really qualifies as a public service job.

23:36I don't know.

23:37I have to see.

23:39I figure something has to do with the public.

23:42Yeah, yeah.

23:44Yeah, I could be wrong.

23:45I never told anybody I was, you know, Einstein, but, hey, you know, that's all I can figure.

23:51It has to do something working with the public.

23:56I'm sure that maybe a government job or something like that might, I don't know, but, okay.

24:04Well, that's a government job now.

24:07Yeah, exactly.

24:09We learned something new today.

24:12All right.

24:13So it looks like we are going to be going to Atlanta, Georgia, ATL.

24:17Shout out to the people out there who watch in the ATL.

24:20So do me a favor if you are from Atlanta, because I know we got something going on in Atlanta,

24:27but we could do more.

24:28Please go ahead and share this podcast out.

24:31Drop it in the comments.

24:33Let me know that you are from Atlanta.

24:36And we're going to help out Mr. Terrence.

24:40Terrence from Georgia says, I brought my house because I tried.

24:46Let me back that up.

24:48You didn't try anything.

24:49I brought my house because I was tired of feeling like I was behind.

24:54That's the truth.

24:55I was 41, single, making good money and still renting an apartment.

25:00Every time somebody asked me when I was going to buy a house, I felt like they were asking why

25:05I hadn't gotten my life together yet.

25:07So when opportunity came, I went for it.

25:11The mortgage payment looked manageable.

25:13That's the number I focused on.

25:15I didn't think enough about everything around it, such as property taxes, homeowners, insurance, repairs, furniture, appliances, higher utility bills.

25:27Then my air conditioner system died.

25:30That repair cost me almost $7,000.

25:33I didn't have $7,000 sitting around, so I put it on a credit card.

25:37A few months later, the roof needed attention.

25:40Then the plumbing started acting up.

25:43Every time I fixed one thing, something else seemed to show up.

25:46The house looked beautiful from the outside.

25:49Inside my finances, it was a completely different story.

25:53The embarrassing part is that I haven't told my family how much pressure I'm under.

25:58When they come over, they compliment the house.

26:01You really did something with this place.

26:03I smile and I say, thank you.

26:06What I don't say is that sometimes I sit in the same house wondering whether I brought a home or

26:11brought myself a financial obligation I wasn't emotionally prepared to carry.

26:15I'm not saying that homeownership was a mistake.

26:18I'm saying I wanted the title of a homeowner so badly that I didn't fully respect the responsibility that was

26:26attached to it.

26:27I thought affordability meant being able to make the monthly payment.

26:31Now I understand that affordability has to include the life that happens around the payment.

26:38How do you know whether you're buying a home because it generally fits your life or because you're trying to

26:44prove that you finally made it?

26:47What you got for Terrence?

26:51Buying a home don't mean you finally made it.

26:54I mean, he didn't have the house inspect.

26:56I mean, even, you know, at least inspect it before he bought the home.

27:01Because most people, that's what they do is buy, you know, when they're going to buy a home, they normally

27:09have it, from what I know, have it inspected.

27:14And, I mean, even when I was coming up, especially when I moved down here, my dad was like that

27:21always, when you're going to get a home, when you're going to get a home, go, you know, this, this

27:25and that.

27:26And I told him, I never had any intentions on buying a home.

27:31He asked me, why not?

27:34And I told him, I said, because it's not just a home you got to think of, it's just not

27:41the, you know, paying the rent or the mortgage.

27:43You got to think about all the other things that go with it, because just because the house is standing

27:50up, you still got to spend money on other things like appliances, utilities, maintenance, keeping the grass cut if you

28:02don't do it.

28:03But even keep, you know, just keeping the grass cut.

28:06And there's a lot of things that go into it.

28:08And I said, look, man, you know, we lived in the house all our life.

28:12I seen what you went through.

28:13I'm not about to go through that.

28:15You know, I said, hey, you know, I want to enjoy it.

28:18I said, plus, I don't make that kind of money to buy no home.

28:24And a lot of people, they think buying a home, they, how they feel like they are, you know, oh,

28:38I made it like he felt.

28:40But that's not it, because there's a lot of things that go into a house, a lot, besides just paying

28:48the mortgage.

28:50You know, there's a lot to it, and a lot of people don't realize that.

28:57Yeah, I think it's the society, the system, and I'll say even the school system, because they start you as

29:05a child, thinking that the best thing that you need to do is go to school, get a great job

29:12with benefits, and settle down, buy a home.

29:18You know, have children and the whole process.

29:21That's the picture that they paint, you know, the white picket fence.

29:25So people go out there thinking that home ownership, that's it.

29:32And I have to say that you don't own your home until you make that last payment.

29:39Do you own or do you rent, is what they say.

29:42And people are so glad to say, I own my home.

29:45But in reality, you don't.

29:47Not unless you made that last payment.

29:50And then you have to continuously keep up with the property taxes, too, because that's a whole other story.

29:55But we'll speak about that.

29:56People tend to forget about the property taxes, and their home ends up getting taken away from them, and liens

30:02are on their house because they can't keep up with the property taxes, which continuously go up every single year.

30:10Exactly.

30:12So there's a lot.

30:13Now, I'm going to help some people out as we're going to go through and help Mr. Terrence.

30:18But while we're going through and helping Terrence out, if your mortgage and everything that goes around it, you're going

30:28to have to add up the property taxes, the utilities, this, that, the next, the other.

30:32If that is more than 30%, you probably have a problem.

30:38And I'll say that again, 30% of your income.

30:41If it's more than 30% of your income, then you probably have a problem.

30:46See, the sweet spot is anywhere between 25% and 30%.

30:50Your home, your rent, your apartment, mortgage, whatever you want to call it, should not exceed more than 30%.

31:00If it does, then you could potentially be in danger.

31:05Now, we're going to take it back to the top, and I'll give you my take on where some of

31:11these things went wrong.

31:13You bought your house because you were tired of feeling like you were behind.

31:16Now, I'm not quite sure where that came from or where that programming came from.

31:23But like I said, the school system started us early, so I could see maybe your family, Birdman, you said

31:28your father was asking about when you were going to get a home.

31:31Sometimes they don't know any better.

31:33Our parents, the people who taught us, they only know what they know.

31:36Right.

31:37Because if you ask, I'm sure that my family feels the same way.

31:43As soon as somebody gets a home, they think that they've made it.

31:46I was speaking to a family member this weekend, and they're talking to me about wanting to own a home.

31:53And I'm thinking to myself, that's not it.

31:56But if you feel that that's what you need to do, there's nothing that I can do to convince you

32:00otherwise.

32:01Sometimes people have to make their own decisions.

32:03So you were 41.

32:06Ain't nothing wrong with that.

32:07Single.

32:07Ain't nothing wrong with that.

32:09Making good money.

32:10Ain't nothing wrong with that.

32:11And still renting an apartment.

32:13Damn sure ain't nothing wrong with that.

32:14But again, you were probably programmed and taught by somebody else that made you think that you needed to have

32:21a house.

32:22That's the problem right there.

32:23See, we have to get into our own situation.

32:27And sometimes the people before us only knew what they knew.

32:31They didn't know any better.

32:33But it's our job to know.

32:35It's our job to seek.

32:36It's our job to find.

32:38It's our job to do something a little bit different.

32:40All we're going to do is repeat the same generational patterns.

32:45Every time somebody asks, when was I going to buy a house?

32:48See, we need to stop it right there.

32:50Why is anybody asking you what you should be doing with your money?

32:54I think we spoke about this last week.

32:56Be very cautious about what somebody else is asking you what you should be doing with your money.

33:01That's the problem.

33:03And when the opportunity came, you went for it.

33:06Based off of this letter here, when the opportunity came, you fell for it.

33:10You didn't went for it.

33:12You fell for it.

33:13The mortgage payment looked manageable.

33:15But I'll take it to this here.

33:17Luke 14, 28.

33:20For which of you intendeth to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counted the cost,

33:28whether he have sufficient to finish it.

33:32So even though that that mortgage payment looked manageable, did you really sit down and count the cost up properly?

33:41You didn't even think about everything around it.

33:43So clearly the answer was no.

33:45Now you have property taxes, home ownership, repairs, landscaping, furniture, appliances, higher utility bills.

33:52And then what typically happens after you get into that home.

33:57I know, Birdman, you said, did he have it inspected?

34:01Most people do.

34:02Like you said, you have to go through the inspection and all of that stuff.

34:07But life happens.

34:08And when life happens, it happens.

34:11And it doesn't sound like there was an emergency fund in place.

34:16And now you got all these bills.

34:17And what you did was put it on credit card.

34:19And now you're in debt.

34:23So, yeah.

34:25Go ahead.

34:26No, go ahead.

34:27Go ahead.

34:28Go ahead.

34:28I'll pick up on it.

34:29So it's a lot of stuff that goes wrong with home ownership.

34:34And you're responsible for it.

34:36See, the joy when you rent an apartment.

34:39And I'm not talking about renting anything from slumlords.

34:43Because we do have some of these people.

34:45You got to know who you rent from.

34:48That's another thing.

34:49Because there are some times where people, these landlords, they don't do the right thing.

34:53And if something breaks, now you got a problem.

34:56But if you know who you're renting from or you're renting from a legitimate place, if something breaks, they have

35:04to fix it.

35:04But it does not come out of your pocket directly.

35:07But when you own a home and there's a roof leak, you have to pay for it.

35:12If you own a home and one of the appliances break, you have to pay for it.

35:17If the plumbing goes, you have to pay for it.

35:21So that's something that you have to think about.

35:25Ladies and gentlemen, they have sold you a lie.

35:29They have told you that your house is an asset.

35:34That couldn't be farther from the truth.

35:36Your house is a liability.

35:38And I'll break it down real quick.

35:40An asset versus a liability.

35:42An asset is anything that brings money into you on a monthly reoccurring basis.

35:47Every month you make money from it.

35:49That is an asset.

35:52A liability is anything that takes money away from you on a monthly reoccurring basis.

35:58So if you own a home and you have to pay for insurance, you have to pay for utilities, that's

36:11taking money away from you.

36:12That is a liability.

36:14Now, if you own a home and you rent it out and you have tenants and they are giving you

36:20money every single month because they have to pay you rent.

36:27That is a liability.

36:29See, this is where people get it twisted and they think that the home that they own, that they live

36:33in, that they sleep in is an asset.

36:36But in reality, it's a liability.

36:39Now, I'm going to go ahead and turn it over to you.

36:41Now, I was going to say, you know, even the thing about it is, and I've seen people who bought

36:49homes, is find out how long the house has been standing before you buy it.

36:57I mean, because, I mean, man, there's some of the neighborhoods I haven't been through.

37:02You see how homes up for sale and you be like, what is they selling?

37:07Because, you know, the house already in shambles.

37:10And, like I said, it just, you know, like I said, I've had an advantage where I've gotten a chance

37:20to see people who moved in a home and then they moved out.

37:25And I'm like, man, you know what, I'd rather stay in an apartment and save my money up and look

37:33for something in a fairly decent neighborhood where a house is kind of like kind of new built than to

37:43go and find a house that's been standing up for 25, 30 years right now.

37:49Because when you get a home like that, you're going to have problems because, you know, my son and I

37:57was, we was talking about this last night.

37:59He was telling me about it because, you know, his mother, you know, that's what she did.

38:03She, when she moved to San Antonio, she got a home because she wanted one so bad.

38:08But now it's like, I don't know what I'm going to do with this.

38:13I don't know what I'm going to do with this.

38:15All these issues coming up about the house and, and, you know, like I said, man, you know, you, you're

38:25talking about apartment slum lords.

38:27I mean, you got people, you got slum lords that, that rent homes or even to sell your home, you

38:34know, and there, there's some people who say, oh, we don't want them fix them up homes.

38:43Okay.

38:44Okay.

38:44How much did you fix up of it and how much of did you add that on to the house?

38:49No.

38:51Oh yeah.

38:52Oh yeah.

38:52That's definitely a thing.

38:54You know, and some, some, now some people are saying, oh, we, you know, um, we fix them up, but

38:59we don't charge extra.

39:01Okay.

39:02I don't know.

39:02I don't know who you, you know, there's somebody going to fall for that.

39:06Exactly.

39:07You know, and you know, uh, I've never felt like if I had my, and my mom, she was, she

39:16was like, you gotta do what you gotta do.

39:18Don't pay no attention to him.

39:20You know, because my dad, you know, he, he used his military, he used his VA loan, got the house

39:25he had here.

39:27And then, you know, when he passed away, we was looking into it, we found out he had a, took

39:33a mortgage out.

39:34He never told nobody.

39:36So, you know, I, mom, my mother had to move out and I had asked him one time, why would

39:45you pay for a home and then, you know, in Michigan, then move down here at your age and buy

39:55another home with a 30 year, you know, mortgage on it.

40:02And, you know, he just said, we wanted to be closer to our family.

40:05I understand living in an apartment can, can be brutal.

40:10Uh, but there are some town homes and I asked him, I said, why didn't y'all, why didn't y

40:16'all just get a town home where you wouldn't have, you know, it wouldn't be so much harder.

40:22But I didn't know at the time that when you got a VA loan, you can only get certain homes.

40:30You can't move, you cannot move into a mobile home unless they changed it, you know, and they, they might

40:37have changed that because they, you know, it used to be, you couldn't move into a mobile home.

40:42Uh, it was, I think it was, uh, condos or something like that.

40:49And I think over the years they've changed that where now you can, but in actuality, he bought a headache

40:57by getting this home.

41:00And then now he got to pay for all these things.

41:03And he's, you know, like you said, he having people asking him and that was, my thinking was like yours.

41:10So who did you had to prove or why did you had to prove that you had to get a

41:15home to be successful?

41:18Yeah, that's something else.

41:20I know, I know a lot of people who been living in apartments and they were successful and they was

41:26happy with it.

41:27Um, one of my, you know, one of my uncles, man, Hey, all his life, he lived in an apartment

41:33and he would tell you, man, I ain't trying to buy no home.

41:36I said, look here, I want to enjoy the little bit of money I'm making or getting.

41:42I want to enjoy it.

41:45And he said, yeah, I put up with, with, you know, the apartment.

41:48He said, he said, when they change management, sometime you get a good management.

41:53Sometime you get a bad management.

41:54He said, but I just deal with it.

41:57Cause he said, at least I don't have to deal with the roof.

42:00And he was, he was naming off all the other things.

42:03And I say, I say, I understand.

42:06He said, he always said, that's my boy.

42:08He said, yeah, he understand.

42:10He said, y'all running around here trying to get in homes.

42:13You're staying there for five years and then you wrap back in the apartment.

42:17You just throwing away your money.

42:19Yeah, that's craziness.

42:21And I had a bunch of cousins that did that.

42:24They all moved into a house and then, you know, Hey, you know, five, six years later, Hey, they had

42:30to move out.

42:33So yeah, that's something else.

42:37I see the part here where it says my finances.

42:41Oh, this part here, the house looked beautiful from the outside, just like your neighbor's house.

42:46Just like who everybody else's house, who you're admiring.

42:50It looks beautiful from the outside.

42:51But this part here really got me.

42:53He said inside my finances was a completely different story.

42:57And that's exactly what happens when you look at somebody else's situation from the outside looking in like that car,

43:05the house, even a relationship.

43:08That could be, that could be fake too.

43:10And then you get into a situation like that.

43:14And then it's a, like a nightmare.

43:16It's like hell on earth.

43:17And you don't even understand how you got yourself here.

43:20Why?

43:20And then now you wonder why you can't sleep at night.

43:24Exactly.

43:27And, you know, it's, and, you know, like I said, who's to say that even if you, you bought a

43:33home in a nice neighborhood, maybe your neighbor right next to you down the street.

43:40They may sell their home and, you know, you don't know who's moving off into it, you know, and it

43:46could be just like being in an apartment, no privacy.

43:51And, you know, my, my dad used to always say, well, when you got your own yard, you got privacy.

43:57No.

43:58Yeah.

43:59Yeah.

43:59I say, yeah, you do.

44:00But then again, I said, one, if somebody next door moved to you, how much privacy do you want to

44:08argue with somebody all the time because they're doing something that they don't have no business doing?

44:14Exactly.

44:16Yeah.

44:16That happened to me.

44:18It goes either, it goes either way with an apartment or a home, but I never felt like buying a

44:23home was going to make me a better person.

44:26I did at once when I was, uh, and then I didn't understand and know who I was.

44:31I did.

44:31And I got caught up in the trap, but have you ever seen that movie Lakeview Terrace, uh, with, uh,

44:38Samuel L. Jackson?

44:39So that's exactly what happened to me.

44:42I have neighbors that were horrible and it was one of those situations.

44:47And then when they finally left, I said, oh, thank God they left.

44:50But then more people came in and they partied like they started on a Friday and they didn't end until

44:59Sunday night.

45:00Yes.

45:01I ate.

45:02Trust me.

45:02I know exactly what you're talking about.

45:07Samuel L. Jackson was like, plant another mother, plant another tree.

45:13Yeah.

45:15That was my part, man.

45:19But, you know, and that's why I think HOA got so popular.

45:23I don't know if they have them up there, but I know down here they do.

45:26And that's why HOA has gotten so popular.

45:30But you know what, from what I've been reading, they, they just as bad as not having an HOA in

45:37the neighborhood.

45:39Yeah.

45:40It all depends on where you live at certain bougie neighborhoods.

45:43They won't allow you to do certain things.

45:45My thing is that if I'm a buy a house and I'm a pay all this types of money, thousands

45:49of dollars, you ain't going to tell me what I can and cannot do on my property.

45:52And that's, that's a problem right there.

45:56I have one time I had put a chain link fence in and I had went down to the municipal

46:03building, signed a permit, got the permit.

46:06They granted me the permit.

46:08And then after the man put the last post in, somebody from the township knocked on the door and says,

46:15oh, we made a mistake.

46:16You can't have a chain link fence.

46:18It has to be a picket fence.

46:19I said, well, I just paid this man about $5,000.

46:22So check, check this out.

46:25Unless you're all going to pay to dig this all the way up and then get it replaced.

46:29You got a problem because I don't know what's going to happen.

46:32But I always kept that in the back of my mind and I sold my home.

46:35But let me tell you that that kind of haunted me all the way up until the day that I

46:41sold my home.

46:41Because I said, now I went back and forth with this person in person.

46:46Now, when it comes time to sell the house, if they start playing some games saying, yeah, we never agreed

46:51to this, it could be an issue.

46:53But in any case, I don't have to worry about that mess anymore.

46:56One of my cousins bought it in HOA.

47:00And, you know, like on the weekends, he had barbecues and he would always, you know, one of them portable

47:05rims, you know, basketball gold.

47:08And he would always, hey, man, come on over, let's shoot some ball.

47:11I'd be like, dude, you know what, man, I'm going to come over there and play around with you.

47:15I said, but, you know, you, you know, I go play where people really play.

47:20Well, one day he forgot to, it was just one day he forgot to take the gold down and put

47:26it in the garage.

47:29He got a notice for it.

47:31Oh, I know what you're talking about, yeah.

47:33And then it was him, okay, him, my cousin, which was married to him, and they had two grown kids

47:42at the time.

47:45So what he did was he gave the car, instead of selling the car, he gave it to his son.

47:53And so they had, you know, two of the vehicles in the, because him and, you know, my cousin worked

48:00at the same spot.

48:01So they rode back and forth to work together.

48:04So they just drove one vehicle.

48:07His daughter had one vehicle and the son had the other vehicle.

48:11They came and told him he had to, he had to get rid of one of them because he couldn't

48:16have a car sitting out in the driveway all night long.

48:21Yeah, no, I can't live there.

48:24Nope, I'm good.

48:27And, you know, I was like, I mean, you're serious.

48:30He said, yeah.

48:31So what they did was her sister stayed a couple blocks from there.

48:38So she would go park her vehicle over there.

48:41And then they would either bring her home or she'll walk to her house.

48:46I said, man, that don't even make sense.

48:49No, I'm not staying there.

48:51Yeah, see, that's why you got to be careful.

48:55Some people will run and jump in and get into a situation like that.

48:58And then they find out all of these things afterwards.

49:01Exactly.

49:02And they don't know.

49:05Wow.

49:06All right.

49:06Well, it's another episode tonight.

49:09I think we did some justice here.

49:12But again, you be careful.

49:14Remember, 25 to 30 percent.

49:17Be careful.

49:18That's that number right there.

49:19That's that magic number right there.

49:21Anything over, you might be doing a little bit, as they say, doing a little bit too much.

49:26So go ahead and let people know what you got going on this week.

49:30Yeah.

49:31Go ahead and get out of here.

49:32You can get my books either at Amazon dot com slash Birdman three one three or Goodreads dot com slash

49:43Birdman three one three.

49:45You can see videos.

49:48Actually, I'm getting ready to work on a new video this week on YouTube dot com slash author poet Birdman

49:56three one three five five.

49:58You can go to Spotify, look at the coffee, wine and words platform and you can see videos.

50:07Birdman three one three.

50:09You can also go to Instagram Birdman three one three five five.

50:14You can see videos.

50:16You can see pictures.

50:18You can see poems that I'd be posting on there.

50:21So I'm kind of and then tomorrow night poetry and music.

50:28Finally caught up with when they're going to have their open mic.

50:31So we haven't they haven't won tomorrow night.

50:34Lady, she already sent me a message because she said she would like for me to come.

50:39Actually, her and I is working on on a song right now together.

50:44I finally, finally, you know, got to got to beat right for it.

50:50You know, you know, you know, it took me, you know, like for three days I was trying to find

50:57it.

50:57And in the day I took some time off and then I today I finally found what will work with

51:07it.

51:07So hopefully I can go ahead and get that done.

51:11I'm not rushing into it.

51:13It's no rush.

51:14And it's just something that we're adding to.

51:16We already have done five song five songs together.

51:20So, you know, it's coming along slowly, but it's surely coming along.

51:26That's what's up.

51:27That's what's up.

51:28Yeah, I have to check that out.

51:32All right.

51:33Well, I will see you next week.

51:35We got Wisdom Wednesday and then you're going to come back for coaching sessions Thursday next week.

51:42So we got two episodes back to back.

51:45It'll be fun to check that out.

51:48Six year anniversary for the podcast.

51:51Yes.

51:53All right.

51:54So thank you so much for coming in.

51:56I'm going to go ahead and get on up out of here.

51:58All right.

51:59As always, I'll be talking to you.

52:02All right.

52:02Take care.

52:03All right.

52:04Take care now.

52:05Yep.

52:07All right.

52:07Ladies and gentlemen, there you have it.

52:09That was author, poet, man, 313.

52:19As I mentioned, yes, please go ahead and check us out.

52:22We will be doing Wisdom Wednesday next week, and then we'll be recording coaching sessions Thursday.

52:27I'm going to bring in a bunch of friends to help celebrate the six-year anniversary of the 4-in

52:33-1 podcast.

52:35And I have a special announcement as far as what we are going to be doing for 2027.

52:41Stay tuned.

52:42We're mostly through this year, so we should start gearing towards 27 anyway.

52:49That's what we like to do to stay on point and stay focused.

52:53And, yeah, I got some great things coming up for you all.

52:56So in the meantime, between time, thank you all so much for joining in.

53:01I appreciate you.

53:02Please go ahead and head on over to LaringGaines.com.

53:07Sign up for that free 15-minute consultation.

53:09If anything sparked interest in you today, you heard anything, that you'd like to find out some more information about

53:16debt-free living.

53:17I focus on debt-free living from the lenses of spiritual, mental, physical, and financial.

53:24Text me.

53:2615.

53:27That's all you got to do is just put 1515, and I'll know exactly what that means.

53:33And we'll go ahead and set up your consultation, your free 15-minute consultation, 609-200-1098.

53:40Again, that number is 609-200-1098.

53:45Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much, and I will see you when I see you.

53:50Take care, y'all.

53:51Have a good night.

54:04Have a good night.

54:35Have a good night.

55:03Have a good night.

I Lied About What The House Cost Me | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 49)

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