What's Something You Wouldn't Notice Go Extinct? (The Bracket, Vol. 137)

Barstool Sports

KenJac | The Bracket

Transcript

00:00:00I get a haircut every week, so definitely tandem, buddy.

00:00:02You get a haircut every week?

00:00:02Nicky, maybe you don't have like a hair loss problem.

00:00:05Maybe you're just getting too many haircuts.

00:00:06Yeah, you're just constantly getting haircuts.

00:00:08From receding to receding, bro.

00:00:10What are you getting a haircut for every week, besides?

00:00:12You look like ultra Miami right now.

00:00:14I look like I could fuck your bitch.

00:00:15Ponson?

00:00:16Certainly not.

00:00:18Nice pack and pull.

00:00:19Certainly not.

00:00:21Great volley there, gentlemen.

00:00:23Okay, welcome to The Bracket, episode 137.

00:00:26Today we are debating a mush special.

00:00:28Yes.

00:00:28A very special one.

00:00:29We're calling it, I believe, things that you wouldn't notice go extinct, basically.

00:00:34Do you have like a better way of describing it?

00:00:36What would you, if an object or something in the world wasn't there anymore,

00:00:41would you have any idea it was gone?

00:00:43This was a very hard one to think of, because it's kind of an oxymoron.

00:00:47Because you shouldn't be able to think of things that would fit this criteria.

00:00:51So it was an interesting thought exercise, but I found it,

00:00:55I just kind of threw together a list, because it's shit

00:00:58that I had to think about.

00:00:59You had to think about shit you didn't care about, which is hard.

00:01:02But that thing you quote tweeted on Twitter.

00:01:04It's probably in there.

00:01:05It's like one of the...

00:01:06That was actually a perfect thing.

00:01:07Don't, I'm not even gonna tell you.

00:01:08I'm not gonna tell you.

00:01:09We're gonna work our way there.

00:01:10These are all objects?

00:01:11Yeah, object thing.

00:01:13It's nouns, I would say.

00:01:15Nouns.

00:01:16Like how long would it take you to realize no one says good morning anymore?

00:01:20Ooh.

00:01:21Wow.

00:01:22I think a week.

00:01:23So there's some things that are more abstract like that, I would guess.

00:01:26Yeah.

00:01:26There's one thing I think on here that's definitely more...

00:01:28It's not a noun.

00:01:29It's a verb.

00:01:30So we could add that in there.

00:01:32Before we get to our first ad, though, I will note,

00:01:34and I mentioned this to you in our chat earlier, Nick.

00:01:36Oh, wow.

00:01:37Somebody gave, sent you these credit card things.

00:01:40It's covers with Yu-Gi-Oh things, and Obelisk the Tormentor is the one you gave me.

00:01:44So I had an interaction with it.

00:01:46Me and my fiance were bored.

00:01:47We're like, let's go to the bowling alley.

00:01:48We're out in Jersey.

00:01:49And we go there, and I paid for our thing with the Obelisk the Tormentor card.

00:01:53And she looked at me.

00:01:54She gave me the stink eye.

00:01:55That's the dumbest fucking thing I've ever seen.

00:01:57Why would you do that?

00:01:58And this group, as the cashier goes with the card of young, I would say 18, 19 year olds,

00:02:04the nerdiest looking guys ever.

00:02:05They're like, that's the coolest fucking card I've ever seen in my life.

00:02:09They literally walk up to me and like, where did you get that?

00:02:11And I was like, I don't know.

00:02:12It's cool, right?

00:02:13And oh, my God, you should have seen Isabelle's face, dude.

00:02:15She was just heart-trodden.

00:02:17She got owned by this dude.

00:02:19Does 18 year old nerd saying it's cool help the case, though?

00:02:22It did, because it was just a group.

00:02:23Any group of people saying something's cool enough times makes it cool enough, I guess.

00:02:27It's a numbers game.

00:02:29Mine, eventually, it fell off from inserting chip too much.

00:02:33I'm a shopaholic, so I lost my charizard.

00:02:36Aw, damn.

00:02:37They are really cool, though.

00:02:38But before we get into this bracket, let's talk about Body Armor.

00:02:41This episode is brought to you by Body Armor Zero Sugar, the brand new Body Armor Zero Sugar

00:02:44sports drink from our friends over at Body Armor.

00:02:46Provides real hydration with no artificial sweeteners, flavors, or dyes.

00:02:49Whether you're looking to stay hydrated or recovering from a long weekend,

00:02:51Body Armor Zero Sugar has got you covered with great tasting flavors like fruit punch

00:02:55and lemon lime.

00:02:55I mention it every time.

00:02:56Don't know how they figured out lemon lime.

00:02:58Oh, and another one.

00:02:59This is a different Body Armor drink.

00:03:01It's Body Armor Flash IV.

00:03:03Do you see this flavor, Shay?

00:03:04That's very good.

00:03:05It's very good.

00:03:06I like the kiwi strawberry.

00:03:07You like that over?

00:03:08This is pepino.

00:03:09This is your thing, is it not?

00:03:11They got lime cucumber?

00:03:12Yeah, there's a cucumber lime right here.

00:03:14Oh, we don't have that in our office.

00:03:16Oh, we have this.

00:03:16Whoa, what the fuck?

00:03:18I'm gonna get a pepino on the phone right now.

00:03:20What's his name?

00:03:22The Body Armor guy.

00:03:23Oh, I don't know.

00:03:24Mike Rapino?

00:03:25No, wait.

00:03:26Is that his name?

00:03:27Mike Rapino is the guy that owns Body Armor.

00:03:29Yeah, Rapino, yeah.

00:03:30Oh, it's okay.

00:03:31Got you.

00:03:31I thought you were fucking up.

00:03:32But yeah, I thought you were saying his name was Mike Rapino.

00:03:34Yeah, I thought you were saying too.

00:03:35Yeah, that's what I thought you were saying.

00:03:37Rapino.

00:03:39I thought you were saying his last name is Mike Rapino.

00:03:42Did he not say Mike Rapino?

00:03:44I don't think his last name is Rapino.

00:03:45It's not.

00:03:46Oh, Rapoli.

00:03:46Rapoli.

00:03:48Mike Rapino.

00:03:50I was thinking of Mike Rapino, that dumbass soccer player.

00:03:53That's what I thought you were fucking saying.

00:03:54And I was like, oh, I can't make fun of that if that's the guy.

00:03:57Mike Rapoli.

00:03:58Yeah.

00:03:59But yeah.

00:03:59Rapino's that American hater.

00:04:00Yes, correct.

00:04:02But the cucumber lime, Che, very good.

00:04:04Very, very good.

00:04:05Lemon of a pepino.

00:04:05Yep, you're one of your favorites.

00:04:07But yeah, check that out.

00:04:08Check out Body Armor Zero Sugar as well.

00:04:09Get yours today at Walmart or a local grocery store near you.

00:04:11We love Body Armor here.

00:04:12You see it every time you watch a Barstool video.

00:04:14You're guaranteed to see Body Armor somewhere.

00:04:16We've got three right in front of us right now.

00:04:18But let's move into the bracket.

00:04:19We've got a whole bunch of stuff to get to.

00:04:20First up, we have the number five seed versus the 12 seed.

00:04:23Which thing would you not notice going extinct overnight?

00:04:27First one being the number five seed.

00:04:28Tandem bikes.

00:04:30I like this one a lot.

00:04:31So bikes, that's the one with the two seats on the same bike.

00:04:35I definitely would not notice this, I don't think.

00:04:37Never.

00:04:38My parents got one for their 30th wedding anniversary.

00:04:42So we have one in our house and I would ride it all the time.

00:04:45Purchased one.

00:04:46They purchased one.

00:04:47Yeah, we have one.

00:04:48And me and my boy Cleveland would go on it and we would rip it.

00:04:51Because you would pedal both as fast as you can.

00:04:53And it goes twice as fast.

00:04:54They're a blast.

00:04:55Really?

00:04:56Would you notice, though, if you never saw a tandem bike again?

00:05:00No.

00:05:01Yeah, but you would notice if that would go in his garage.

00:05:03You go, where the fuck my tandem bike?

00:05:05There's a tandem bike at the house this weekend.

00:05:07Tandem bikes are, when I picture tandem bikes, picture literally a shore.

00:05:10Like a boardwalk or like a beach.

00:05:13But like, I wouldn't be like, where's all the tandem bikes?

00:05:17Everybody's riding solo on these bikes.

00:05:19Yeah.

00:05:19Well, bikes are a sham, gentlemen.

00:05:22I would notice tandem bikes were missing before unicycles were missing.

00:05:26Definitely.

00:05:27Yeah.

00:05:28Yeah.

00:05:29Do they still have pegs on the back of bikes?

00:05:31Oh, yeah.

00:05:32I feel like I haven't seen that anymore.

00:05:33Bikes are a sham, though, now.

00:05:35No one rides them.

00:05:36It's all like motorized.

00:05:37Mopeds, basically.

00:05:38Yeah.

00:05:39It's just stupid.

00:05:39Yeah.

00:05:40Would unicycles count?

00:05:41Like, what are those motorized ones you see the idiots riding in the city on?

00:05:44You know what I'm talking about?

00:05:45Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:05:46The one wheels?

00:05:46Yeah, the one wheels.

00:05:47I've never seen a cool guy doing that.

00:05:49Ever.

00:05:51And that's going up.

00:05:51Tandem bikes is going up against the number 12.

00:05:54See, one of Nick's spinning barbershop poles.

00:05:56Those little blue and red poles that just spin in front of a barbershop.

00:06:00No, I would want.

00:06:02These are all going to be never.

00:06:05You would definitely notice that.

00:06:08I like those a lot, but I don't know if I would notice.

00:06:11You would notice it.

00:06:12What do you mean?

00:06:13In what way would you notice?

00:06:15That barber doesn't.

00:06:16Yeah, I mean, where all the poles.

00:06:18I notice that now if a barbershop doesn't have that.

00:06:21I agree.

00:06:22You wouldn't think twice.

00:06:24You'd be like, that's just another barbershop.

00:06:26No, I would notice if I don't.

00:06:29I almost like I respect the barbershop more if they have it.

00:06:32That has one.

00:06:33Yes, I agree.

00:06:34Let's start with you, Marty.

00:06:35Tandem bikes are spinning barbershop poles.

00:06:38Why does that exist, by the way?

00:06:40Was that for the illiterate to show that it's a barbershop?

00:06:42I don't know.

00:06:43I would love to know that.

00:06:44Maybe that's why Marty loves it.

00:06:45I couldn't read barber.

00:06:49Wouldn't it also just be like a scissor?

00:06:52You don't see that and you're like, oh, haircut.

00:06:54No, because that's why.

00:06:57What if barbicide left?

00:07:00Like that little blue goo that they put in the.

00:07:02The blue thing that I've never seen a barber actually use.

00:07:04It's like you put in the.

00:07:05They keep the combs and shit.

00:07:07I like that too.

00:07:08I think I would notice that.

00:07:09I'd be like, where'd you get that comb from?

00:07:12I'm going tandem bike.

00:07:14Tandem bike.

00:07:15The barber pole, by the way, it's a tradition going back to the Middle Ages.

00:07:18I didn't know they barbers in the Middle Ages.

00:07:19What staffer would hold on to it?

00:07:22Yeah, damn.

00:07:24Just like a grip it to.

00:07:25There is a insanely long Wikipedia for barber poles, like way to its aviation and space

00:07:31flight is a tab for it somehow.

00:07:34So barber pole or tandem bikes in one vote.

00:07:36I'm going to go tandem bikes, too.

00:07:37I think there's a chance that I might like see a barbershop that I've been to when I

00:07:41know it has a big.

00:07:42Oh, I wonder where that went.

00:07:43Very, very minuscule.

00:07:45Less than 1% chance, but quicker than I would ever utter.

00:07:48Man, what happened to those tandem bikes?

00:07:51All those tandem bikes.

00:07:52So I'll go with tandem bikes.

00:07:53Do you like those things?

00:07:55And what are those things in Nashville that they always ride on?

00:07:57Like bachelor parties?

00:07:58Do you know what I'm talking about?

00:07:58Is that tech?

00:07:59No, no, no.

00:08:00Oh, the pedals.

00:08:00The pedal things.

00:08:01Oh, those are bikes.

00:08:02Super bikes.

00:08:02That's not considered a tandem bike, right?

00:08:04Tandems only, too.

00:08:04No, the bikes like the pedal.

00:08:07You pedal and you drink.

00:08:08Yeah, yeah, those are great.

00:08:09Che, those are awful.

00:08:12I would definitely notice the barber poles missing.

00:08:15So, I mean, a bunch of us moved to Chicago within the last year

00:08:20looking for a new barber, like, especially here.

00:08:23A lot of things are in, like, kind of strip malls.

00:08:25Yeah.

00:08:25So if you see, like, barber here and you don't see that sign,

00:08:29you're just like, where the fuck is this place?

00:08:31So, yeah, I would be looking for the spinning.

00:08:36Three for tandem bikes, none for spinning barbershop poles.

00:08:38Nick?

00:08:40I'm an honorable man.

00:08:41I'm going tandem bikes.

00:08:43Ooh, switching the vote.

00:08:45Tandem bikes, one vote.

00:08:46KB?

00:08:46We're voting what we'd be less likely to notice.

00:08:54Wait, what?

00:08:56Do you guys know these things, right?

00:08:57Which one you wouldn't notice if they were gone?

00:08:59Yeah, if it was gone, you wouldn't notice.

00:09:02I wouldn't notice.

00:09:03Yeah.

00:09:03If they were gone.

00:09:03Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:09:04And you voted tandem bike.

00:09:05God, making sure.

00:09:06How am I getting confused in my own one?

00:09:09The barbershop you go to now, does it have the spinning pole?

00:09:12Yeah, mine does.

00:09:14Mine doesn't.

00:09:15I just went to one in Chicago, too.

00:09:17It's great.

00:09:18You're gonna go tandem, KB?

00:09:22Both never.

00:09:23Both would be lifetimes.

00:09:24Lifetimes.

00:09:25But I'll go tandem bike.

00:09:26Less likely.

00:09:27Tandem bike.

00:09:28Nick?

00:09:29Nicky.

00:09:29I get a haircut every week, so definitely tandem bike.

00:09:31You get a haircut every week?

00:09:33You Jeffy Lowe it?

00:09:34What are you getting a haircut every week for?

00:09:35If it's something personal to your life experience, maybe.

00:09:41Where is the barber pole at my barbershop?

00:09:44Nicky, maybe you don't have a hair loss problem.

00:09:46Maybe you're just getting too many haircuts.

00:09:47Yeah, from receding to receding a haircut.

00:09:51What are you getting a haircut for?

00:09:52It's really for my beard.

00:09:54It's for my beard and my side fade.

00:09:56I don't really touch the top every week.

00:09:57It's just the sides.

00:09:58You look like ultra Miami right now.

00:10:00I look like I could fuck your bitch.

00:10:01Concert?

00:10:03Certainly not.

00:10:04Nice pack and four.

00:10:05Certainly not.

00:10:07Great volley there, gentlemen.

00:10:08You look like a music festival.

00:10:11You look like a music festival.

00:10:14Tandem bikes is going to move on, though.

00:10:16Now we have the four-seat versus the 13-seat.

00:10:18The four-seat is Nichols.

00:10:19This is one of Nick's, actually.

00:10:20And a couple other people's as well.

00:10:22Nichols, I agree.

00:10:23That doesn't count.

00:10:23This is a fun one, but I would notice.

00:10:26Why?

00:10:26Change is going extinct.

00:10:28But I think it counts.

00:10:30There's Nichols.

00:10:30I mean, it exists right now.

00:10:32All other change is prominent in popular culture.

00:10:36Lucky penny.

00:10:37Calling somebody a dime.

00:10:39Throwing a good pass is a dime.

00:10:41Quarter machine.

00:10:42Quarterback.

00:10:43There's a nickel package, maybe, in football.

00:10:47Nichols are the forgotten of the coinage, other than the 50 cent piece.

00:10:50There is the Nickelback joke.

00:10:52Frank's Nickelback joke.

00:10:54Frank does.

00:10:55Frank does have the Nickelback joke.

00:10:56Frank would notice the first second they disappeared.

00:11:00And Nichols are going up against number 13-seat.

00:11:03This is one of Tommy's.

00:11:04Preset iPhone apps.

00:11:05It's like the ones you just never, ever use.

00:11:06You get rid of them immediately.

00:11:07The Keynote app.

00:11:08Oh, yeah.

00:11:09Like shortcuts.

00:11:10Yeah, shortcuts, quick links.

00:11:11Keynote, shortcuts, files, numbers, and pages.

00:11:15Yeah.

00:11:15I use files.

00:11:16Especially the Keynote app.

00:11:17I would never notice if that was gone.

00:11:19No.

00:11:20Pages.

00:11:20GarageBand.

00:11:21Clips.

00:11:22You might notice.

00:11:23You wouldn't notice if the Keynote app was out.

00:11:25Like, off your phone, deleted, and you didn't even notice.

00:11:27Yeah.

00:11:28I'm going to get rid of them right now.

00:11:29Yeah.

00:11:30So, Nichols versus these preset iPhone apps.

00:11:32Start with you, Nicky.

00:11:34Um, I get Nichols and quarters mixed up all the time.

00:11:38So, I would definitely notice if Nichols disappeared.

00:11:41Wait, how?

00:11:42No, like, at first glance.

00:11:44Like, oh, I needed a quarter for the Lucy vending machine.

00:11:47I, like, might grab one real quick.

00:11:48And I'm like, oh, fuck.

00:11:49This is a Nichol.

00:11:49And then I got to go back and get a quarter.

00:11:51Fair.

00:11:52So, I would definitely go the apps that I've never opened.

00:11:56Do you know what the Keynote app is?

00:11:59Yeah.

00:11:59It's like that fake wannabe PowerPoint.

00:12:01Oh, okay.

00:12:01Yeah.

00:12:02Nice.

00:12:02Uh, KB.

00:12:06I think, um, I think I could go years without noticing the Nichol.

00:12:11And then I'd probably naturally end up in a big jumble of change and figure it out eventually.

00:12:18But Nichol, yes.

00:12:23The other one, which was what?

00:12:26A preset iPhone app, like the Keynote.

00:12:28Never.

00:12:29So, um, that.

00:12:30Never once.

00:12:31Two for the preset iPhone apps, Nick.

00:12:34The preset iPhone app.

00:12:36So, I'm deleting them right now.

00:12:38And it feels so good.

00:12:40Uh, Che?

00:12:41Can you do that?

00:12:42Yeah.

00:12:42I didn't know you could delete those.

00:12:43It used to be, I think, that you could.

00:12:44And now, the last phone I got, I deleted all of them.

00:12:46And I didn't know you could.

00:12:47I'm pretty sure you could delete your text messaging app now if you wanted to.

00:12:51Yeah.

00:12:53I just put.

00:12:53That would be a fun prank to borrow somebody's phone and delete their text.

00:12:55And use your phone really quick.

00:12:59Lose all your nudes.

00:13:00That'd be terrible.

00:13:00Jesus Christ.

00:13:02Jay?

00:13:04Um, yeah, the pre-stored iPhone.

00:13:08I've never opened those once.

00:13:09So, those can go kick rocks and I wouldn't notice.

00:13:12I would have thought that you, actually, no.

00:13:14The more I'm thinking.

00:13:14I was going to say I would have thought that you would have used them.

00:13:16But the fact that you used the bought flashlight app until like last year.

00:13:22Kind of dispelled me of that pretty quick.

00:13:25I use the notes app.

00:13:26Which I guess is a pre-loaded one.

00:13:28No, that's a useful enough one.

00:13:29Everyone uses that app.

00:13:29Yeah, but like the keynotes and all that.

00:13:32Forget it.

00:13:33I'm going to delete those right now.

00:13:34Exactly.

00:13:34Tommy?

00:13:35Yeah, I mean, nickels are useless.

00:13:37But I do think of like the first time where I got change back somewhere that was nine cents.

00:13:42And they handed me like nine pennies.

00:13:44I'd be like, that's weird.

00:13:45What happened to nickels?

00:13:47I think I might eventually get to that.

00:13:50I would never notice if the keynote app or all these other forgettable ones that I only know.

00:13:53Because I looked them up earlier.

00:13:54Disappeared.

00:13:55So, another one for iPhone apps.

00:13:57I'm going nickel.

00:13:58You're going nickel?

00:13:59I don't think I'd ever have any idea.

00:14:02I don't really use cash enough.

00:14:03I feel like either two.

00:14:04It would take me a long time.

00:14:05Yeah, it'd take a long time.

00:14:07Either way, iPhone apps is going to move on.

00:14:08Now, we have the eight seed versus the nine seed.

00:14:09The eight seed is welcome mats.

00:14:11Another nick one.

00:14:12Welcome mats, I agree.

00:14:13I don't think it would take me a long time to realize that they vanished forever.

00:14:16And that's going up against the number nine seed, handkerchiefs.

00:14:20Marty and I just noticed different things.

00:14:22Yeah, I hate welcome mats.

00:14:23So, I always point them out.

00:14:26Be like, how fucking stupid are these things?

00:14:28So, that's why.

00:14:29I bought one last week.

00:14:31And how stupid is it?

00:14:31And it just annoyed me.

00:14:33Yeah, I never think about them.

00:14:36And that's going up against handkerchiefs.

00:14:37Handkerchiefs.

00:14:38Oh, I would have no idea what handkerchiefs are.

00:14:41People still use them though.

00:14:42I grew up a hanky cake when I was sick.

00:14:45Take one to school.

00:14:47I don't even get what do you do with it after?

00:14:51You blow your nose in it.

00:14:52You put it in the washing machine.

00:14:53That's crazy.

00:14:54That's insane.

00:14:55What tissues existed?

00:14:56Was I poor?

00:15:00You're like reusable.

00:15:00It's so my grandpa, my dad, we're all usable napkins.

00:15:03I would get out the way in your shirt.

00:15:04I would go to school when I had like a cold with a hanky.

00:15:07That's crazy.

00:15:09I don't know if you're you want a big ghetto.

00:15:10Yeah.

00:15:11Yeah.

00:15:11That's pretty bad.

00:15:12Fuck yeah.

00:15:14So, welcome mats versus handkerchiefs.

00:15:16Handkerchief.

00:15:18Handkerchief.

00:15:19I think it's handkerchief.

00:15:21I say handkerchief.

00:15:22Kerchief.

00:15:23Handkerchief.

00:15:24Yeah.

00:15:24There's an IE in there, right?

00:15:27Now, are we counting the things that you stuff in like a tuxedo pocket?

00:15:29No, I don't think I thought about that.

00:15:31I don't think that's a hanker.

00:15:32Yeah, that's what we're talking about.

00:15:34No, it's like a snot cloth.

00:15:35Mine was like a bandana.

00:15:36I thought handkerchiefs go kind of like in your suit.

00:15:38Like in the suit.

00:15:39That's a kerchief.

00:15:40Handkerchiefs, back jean pocket.

00:15:42Yeah.

00:15:43What the fuck's a kerchief?

00:15:44Wait, what?

00:15:45Kerchief is what you put in the tuxedo.

00:15:46So what you put in a suit is not a handkerchief?

00:15:49Hold on.

00:15:49A kerchief.

00:15:50That kerchief is what you put in the front suit pocket.

00:15:52No, you're tripping.

00:15:53Handkerchief is what you put your nose in.

00:15:55Handkerchief.

00:15:56I thought it was just a kerchief.

00:15:57I thought it was a pocket square.

00:15:58You're 100% positive.

00:15:59Wait, are these two different things?

00:16:00A handkerchief is a form of a kerchief or a bandana, typically hem squared,

00:16:05for personal hygiene purposes, such as wiping your nose.

00:16:08That's probably in the same family.

00:16:09This was Che's, I believe.

00:16:10No, this was mine.

00:16:11Which handker...

00:16:11Oh, it was yours?

00:16:12Oh, maybe we both said it, I guess.

00:16:13So which handkerchief did you guys mean?

00:16:15The thing in the suit pocket that, like, typically in...

00:16:19I don't think anyone actually does this, but you blow your nose.

00:16:21No, Nick just said he did.

00:16:22I meant I did in school.

00:16:24I used to.

00:16:25Not in the suits, though.

00:16:26I would have, like, a white, like, cloth that I would bring into...

00:16:30God damn.

00:16:31A white cloth.

00:16:32Like, I would use handkerchiefs.

00:16:34I bet you I still have handkerchiefs at home.

00:16:36We had a drawer where my mom would go and fold them.

00:16:39Where would you put them on your body?

00:16:41Back pocket.

00:16:42So again, we're saying specifically not the fashion one.

00:16:44We're saying the operational snot one.

00:16:47The personal hygiene handkerchief.

00:16:48Yeah, personal hygiene handkerchief versus welcome mats.

00:16:51We have one vote for handkerchief.

00:16:53I'm going handkerchiefs, too.

00:16:54Welcome mats, I also don't care for.

00:16:56Don't think I would notice.

00:16:57But my next door neighbor, like, in my apartment building does have a welcome mat

00:17:04that I always look at.

00:17:05And I'm like, that's what I'm at my floor.

00:17:06Because I have a lot of flights of stairs to walk up.

00:17:08So, oh, there it is.

00:17:09So if that was gone, I might be like, oh, that's...

00:17:10My old apartment neighbors had the Salazars on there.

00:17:15And one day it wasn't there.

00:17:17I was like, oh, my God.

00:17:17You noticed.

00:17:18That's a cool last name.

00:17:20Handkerchiefs.

00:17:22Jay?

00:17:24Yeah, I have a welcome at my house.

00:17:26I think I've always had a welcome at my house.

00:17:27So, yeah, definitely handkerchiefs.

00:17:29Handkerchiefs.

00:17:30Nick?

00:17:31These are both kind of the same level for me.

00:17:34Good matchup.

00:17:35I'll go handkerchiefs.

00:17:37I...

00:17:38They're pretty commonplace for me.

00:17:41Four for handkerchiefs.

00:17:42Jay, KB?

00:17:43I could be already be experiencing this with a handkerchief.

00:17:47What do you mean?

00:17:49I haven't seen one since Jack Savage had one when he was like early 70s.

00:17:54Early 70s.

00:17:55So I don't know the last time I've seen a handkerchief.

00:17:57You never saw Nick one using the one in school?

00:17:59I brought one to St. Vincent's all...

00:18:01Yeah, that's decades ago.

00:18:02Yeah.

00:18:03Handkerchief.

00:18:04Handkerchief.

00:18:05Nicky?

00:18:05I think I could get to welcome mat eventually.

00:18:07Gotcha.

00:18:09I feel like I'd notice if welcome mats disappeared

00:18:11because every time I'm drunk and walk home,

00:18:13like I always trip over my neighbors.

00:18:15So I'd be like, oh, I didn't fall down this time.

00:18:17This is nice.

00:18:17So handkerchief for sure.

00:18:18I like that you're visiting people's houses.

00:18:20I do wipe my feet before going in.

00:18:22So it's not really me noticing.

00:18:23It's almost like reflex.

00:18:25Handkerchiefs are gonna move on.

00:18:26Now we can do our chain game.

00:18:28And we have two of them today.

00:18:30One of them is more just like,

00:18:31I'm not sure if this is like a confused thing here.

00:18:34I like this option.

00:18:35First chain option is the one friend

00:18:36that never talks in the group chat.

00:18:38I feel like a lot of different people have

00:18:40at least one of those.

00:18:40One person has never responded.

00:18:41So one of my friends in the group chat

00:18:43disappeared from earth.

00:18:44I like it because it's funny and not thought out at all.

00:18:47Because like if that person disappeared,

00:18:49you would definitely notice.

00:18:50Oh, but it's the person?

00:18:52I feel like it's if they leave the group chat.

00:18:54I think I've had a group text where we were

00:18:58talking shit about the guy who forgot.

00:19:00Like we forgot he was in the chat still.

00:19:02We were talking shit about him and he was like,

00:19:04and he answered the first time in years.

00:19:06Oh, my God.

00:19:06Then you gotta play it off.

00:19:07Be like, oh, we did that for you.

00:19:09Just trying to see if you were noticing.

00:19:10Exactly what we did.

00:19:13So the friend, again, is the one disappearing.

00:19:16It's not existing forever.

00:19:17So I don't think that one is.

00:19:18A lot of these aren't.

00:19:19So he dies.

00:19:20Not dies.

00:19:21Disappears forever.

00:19:22Like Thanos.

00:19:23Yeah, Thanos snapped.

00:19:24He's gone forever.

00:19:26Must put bar of soap.

00:19:27Yeah, bars.

00:19:28That's disgusting.

00:19:30I just use liquid soap.

00:19:32Like the bottles of soap.

00:19:33I don't use bars of soap.

00:19:35Body wash.

00:19:36I think we would know.

00:19:37What about like hotels?

00:19:39Hotels.

00:19:40All right.

00:19:40They mostly all now have the.

00:19:42But they give it to you to wash your hands.

00:19:44I guess.

00:19:45I just don't think I would notice if everything was just turned into liquid,

00:19:48like body wash.

00:19:49You would be like, you would have no idea.

00:19:52I don't know.

00:19:53I still don't mind the bars.

00:19:54I think bar of soap is kind of disgusting.

00:19:55I don't use it anymore.

00:19:56I feel cleaner after a bath.

00:19:58Yeah, it feels good.

00:19:59Yeah.

00:20:00Well, and then you use the bar of soap like later or.

00:20:05No, you just have to ask and throw it away.

00:20:07Yep.

00:20:08Wait, wait.

00:20:09You take single use.

00:20:11Yep.

00:20:11You talk about the hotel soap.

00:20:13Just any bar of soap strictly for my ass.

00:20:16So you one swipe credit card, swipe your asshole and then just throw it away.

00:20:20You don't throw it away.

00:20:21You use that over and over.

00:20:22It's my ass.

00:20:23You have an asshole.

00:20:24Yeah.

00:20:25How many times?

00:20:26How many times?

00:20:27So how many times does it clean your ass before you throw it out?

00:20:31Till it runs out.

00:20:32Yeah.

00:20:32So it disappears.

00:20:33Yeah.

00:20:33Oh, it's literally for your.

00:20:35So you're eventually using a little piece.

00:20:39Have you ever used a full bar?

00:20:40Like it just when it actually disappears.

00:20:42Yes.

00:20:42Oh, wait to my asshole.

00:20:43No, not just for your ass.

00:20:46And then like you would use it.

00:20:47You would never throw it away because it was still so small.

00:20:50And then you start like mashing it against the other small.

00:20:53Yeah.

00:20:53It's like kind of.

00:20:54So your ass.

00:20:56So now I kind of miss bar.

00:20:57So I have one in my shower right now.

00:20:59It's fun.

00:21:00You ever see the Charles Barkley story where he talks about how he was like using hotel

00:21:04soap and he was cleaning it and I kind of lost it for a minute.

00:21:07No, it slipped in there and I couldn't find it.

00:21:11God, I'm going to miss the show.

00:21:12Entirely possible.

00:21:13Hotel soap.

00:21:14Oh, like when I get out of there, I always feel dry.

00:21:16Yeah, me too.

00:21:17I hate the way it makes my skin feel.

00:21:18I don't like it.

00:21:19Yeah, but I don't like the pumps on the wall because you can access.

00:21:22I don't like that either.

00:21:24Some of them have been locked in, though.

00:21:25Yeah, yeah, I like that.

00:21:27I'm always afraid.

00:21:28So yeah, I always and every time I go to the hotel, the last shower I take, I spit in all

00:21:32this.

00:21:32Yeah.

00:21:33In case somebody pulled a fast one on me.

00:21:36Yeah.

00:21:36Pay it forward to the next person.

00:21:38Pay it forward.

00:21:39I'm going to spit and piss in this condition.

00:21:41Another bathroom.

00:21:41One must also put bathroom garbages.

00:21:44Yeah.

00:21:45What?

00:21:48Those are my most used garbage.

00:21:50I think that most of it was actually gone.

00:21:53You would have no idea.

00:21:54You go to the normal garbage.

00:21:56No, if it was gone, I would after I PSQ of the post post shower Q tip.

00:22:02I will throw it right in that little thing right in front of the shower.

00:22:06I mostly just hate small garbages.

00:22:08Tiny garbages.

00:22:09Well, yeah, yeah.

00:22:10But you clean your ears after you shower.

00:22:12It's better than any sex.

00:22:14You're really not supposed to tip.

00:22:16Nick does really bad damage.

00:22:18Yeah, it does.

00:22:18Yeah.

00:22:19They've been saying that, but I've been doing it feels wet ear.

00:22:23Double Q tip.

00:22:24Holy fuck.

00:22:25Feels great.

00:22:25The best.

00:22:26Yeah, I love Nick.

00:22:27Also put John heater.

00:22:30Yeah, the actor that played Napoleon Dynamite.

00:22:32The actor that played Napoleon Dynamite.

00:22:33He hasn't really been anything.

00:22:34Yeah, I would never think of him.

00:22:37Hubcaps from Che.

00:22:40What's the hubcap?

00:22:41The fake thing that goes over tires.

00:22:43Gotcha.

00:22:44And then lastly, water fountains as an adult.

00:22:47I love water fountain.

00:22:49Weirdly enough, when we did that drafting shoot last week,

00:22:52one of the guy who's shooting it like that doesn't work for

00:22:55Barstow was just running around looking for a water fountain.

00:22:59And I was like, I'm pretty sure there's one by the bathroom.

00:23:02He was adamant on a water fountain.

00:23:05Water fountains are huge as a kid.

00:23:07That's what says as an adult.

00:23:09You know what?

00:23:09I wouldn't notice water hoses.

00:23:11I think it was.

00:23:12What was it?

00:23:12Was it Big Daddy or something else that had a Kool-Aid?

00:23:16Mr. Deeds had the Kool-Aid.

00:23:17Mr. Deeds had that.

00:23:19I always thought that was going to be the coolest thing.

00:23:20And you always knew which ones in elementary school had the

00:23:22coldest water.

00:23:23Oh, you did.

00:23:24But then after that.

00:23:25But then there was the one like my elementary school had the

00:23:28taller one and the shorter one, and the taller one just barely

00:23:31drizzled outside of the nozzle.

00:23:33So you had to wrap your mouth around the fucking nickel metal.

00:23:37You should realize how disgusting they are.

00:23:39I would always judge the kids who put their lips really close

00:23:41to it.

00:23:42Yes.

00:23:43There's a whole episode of Parks and Rec about that.

00:23:45They had to put, like, cup cages around the bottles because

00:23:48all the citizens keep putting their whole mouth around the

00:23:50whole fucking thing.

00:23:52Did you ever have, like, the annoying kid in school count as

00:23:54you were drinking?

00:23:55Yeah, save some for the fishes.

00:24:00Save some for the fishes.

00:24:02Such a good callback.

00:24:05Wow.

00:24:06I forgot all about it.

00:24:07Oh, they were the worst.

00:24:08They would count.

00:24:10Or.

00:24:12Jesus.

00:24:13I remember being so thirsty using those, though.

00:24:16Like, it was the best.

00:24:16But you couldn't get hit with a fishy.

00:24:18After gym class.

00:24:20Yeah.

00:24:20Water fountains now are just, like, water bottles.

00:24:22I still use them regularly.

00:24:23Oh, I don't.

00:24:24I would notice pretty quickly.

00:24:26When you would go to the water fountain, would you have a set

00:24:28number of sips?

00:24:28Like, I would always do 15.

00:24:30I would.

00:24:32You were the guy getting yelled at to save some for the fishes.

00:24:35I don't think that's crazy long.

00:24:37You're doing pretty quick.

00:24:38It was my most refreshing quenches.

00:24:40The best quenches were from water fountains.

00:24:42I'd argue water hose.

00:24:44Hose had some good ones.

00:24:45My mom always told me I'd get lockjaw.

00:24:47Really?

00:24:48Yeah, it's a rumor.

00:24:50So to give the run through the options again, and Nikki smokes,

00:24:52you'll go first.

00:24:53Wait, that's not a bad bracket, too.

00:24:55Best quenches.

00:24:56I know.

00:24:57Best quenches and also just, like, rumors like that.

00:25:00Best rumors.

00:25:01Wives tales.

00:25:01Old wives tales.

00:25:02Make funny faces.

00:25:03Things your mom scared you.

00:25:04Yeah.

00:25:05Turning on the console light in the car.

00:25:06Yep.

00:25:07Yep.

00:25:08Yeah, the light in the car.

00:25:10We've talked about it on here.

00:25:12It was like you were going to die if that happened.

00:25:16Yep, exactly.

00:25:17So to run through the options again, the one friend that never talks in the group chat.

00:25:20Cashier.

00:25:21Oh, sorry.

00:25:22Yeah, I missed one earlier.

00:25:24I think I mixed some of these up.

00:25:26Sorry.

00:25:26So that one's for a separate one.

00:25:27So to run through the options again, the bar of soap, bathroom garbages, John heater,

00:25:33hubcaps, water fountains as an adult, and that one friend that never talks in the group chat.

00:25:37Starting with you, Nikki smokes.

00:25:39I don't even know what a John heater is.

00:25:40What was that?

00:25:41That was John heater was a Napoleon Dynamite actor.

00:25:43You guys already forgot.

00:25:46Damn.

00:25:47John heater.

00:25:48All those other ones I feel like I use pretty much in everyday life.

00:25:51So.

00:25:51So one for John heater.

00:25:53KB.

00:25:56Yeah, John heater by far.

00:25:58John heater by far.

00:25:58Now in this hypothetical, I would maybe Google him in like eight years because I would think

00:26:03about Napoleon Dynamite.

00:26:05Would that reveal that he was banished?

00:26:07Yeah.

00:26:07It's also in Benchwarmers.

00:26:09Yeah, that's what I think.

00:26:10Yeah.

00:26:11And he's also in Blades of Glory.

00:26:13Yes.

00:26:13Blades of Glory.

00:26:14Damn.

00:26:15I feel like I would Google him.

00:26:19He is very good in Blades of Glory.

00:26:21The rest.

00:26:22Those are big movies.

00:26:23Yeah, I would know.

00:26:24But we've forgotten about him.

00:26:26I think I would notice.

00:26:26I actually didn't know he was the Blades of Glory guy.

00:26:30One you just have to take a second to think about.

00:26:32Yeah.

00:26:32My Grubhub driver just text me.

00:26:34He said, can you tip me more?

00:26:36I haven't got my food yet.

00:26:37Because the office is too far out of the way and it's not worth it to him to bring the food.

00:26:43But he has the food in his car.

00:26:45Yeah, he's got you by the fucking balls.

00:26:48Did he really do that?

00:26:48He's not delivering his food if you don't tip him more.

00:26:50Yeah, I got you on cash and then just take it.

00:26:53There's no way that's ever worked.

00:26:55I'm not answering this.

00:26:56This guy's a scab.

00:26:59What do you mean it's out of the like it was within your delivery zone, obviously, right?

00:27:03Yeah, I ordered this to the office many times.

00:27:06It's just a little inconvenient for him right now.

00:27:09Yeah, if you were able to order it, then it's fine.

00:27:12I feel like you just go full Karen and post that on Twitter and get like $300.

00:27:16I got to see what this guy looks like.

00:27:17So three for John here.

00:27:19I'm going to switch to hubcaps, maybe.

00:27:21Hubcaps.

00:27:22They're always on the side of the road.

00:27:23Yeah, but I wouldn't notice that they're not.

00:27:25Okay.

00:27:26Like, where's the hubcap?

00:27:27What would tires look like?

00:27:28Don't tires all have hubcaps?

00:27:30They have rims or hubcaps.

00:27:32Are we talking about like the shit that's on the back of a Jeep?

00:27:35You know, like Jeeps have that spare tire on the back.

00:27:36That's just a spare tire.

00:27:38That's either a rim.

00:27:39Oh, we would definitely know if hubcaps were gone.

00:27:41Is it just a tire?

00:27:42Hubcaps are nice.

00:27:43Hubcaps are like the fake covers so you don't just see the black tire.

00:27:47You can either have real rims or hubcaps.

00:27:50A lot of people have hubcaps.

00:27:51You would notice if these were gone, I think.

00:27:53Oh, yeah, we know.

00:27:54These aren't rims.

00:27:55Oh, I thought hubcaps were like the screws.

00:27:58We used to steal those as kids.

00:28:01Hubcaps are cheaper tires.

00:28:03They just cover to they look like rims.

00:28:04I'm going to look it up.

00:28:05There was a place called Hubcaps by Claysville.

00:28:08Yes.

00:28:08The way to Washington.

00:28:09What was it?

00:28:10I'm still going to go Heater.

00:28:12Oh, I'd say hubcaps for sure.

00:28:13Okay, you're going back to Heater.

00:28:14Wait, wait, no, no, no, no.

00:28:16I would recognize hubcaps being gone.

00:28:18I'm staying with my answer John Heater.

00:28:19So three for John Heater, Che.

00:28:22I'm going hubcaps.

00:28:23I don't know what they practically do.

00:28:25Like if there was an if cars just stopped having you just be like, all right.

00:28:29I would never think.

00:28:30But you'd notice tires would look different.

00:28:32Yeah, they'd look very different.

00:28:33Something went missing from cars.

00:28:34I wouldn't notice back windshield wipers going missing.

00:28:38Oh, that's a good one.

00:28:41I don't think I would either.

00:28:42All right, fine.

00:28:43Fine.

00:28:43Napoleon Dynamite.

00:28:44Another one for Napoleon Dynamite.

00:28:46Tommy, what's his name?

00:28:47Che.

00:28:48John Heater.

00:28:49Oh, yeah.

00:28:50See, it's a forgettable guy.

00:28:51I'm going to go John Heater as well.

00:28:53Another for John Heater.

00:28:54Clean sweep.

00:28:55Clean sweep for John Heater.

00:28:56John Heater is going to go up against our number one seed.

00:28:59And this is the guy, the one that submitted that one.

00:29:01I think it is tremendous.

00:29:02Such a perfect spirit of this one.

00:29:04This guy submitted wheel stops in parking lots, which I think is the perfect, perfect suggestion.

00:29:10Show him a picture.

00:29:10So I'll send you guys wheel stop.

00:29:12So do you remember if you ever go to a parking lot?

00:29:13Sometimes they have this little mound of concrete that's all the way at the front of the spot

00:29:18where the front tire is supposed to stop on them.

00:29:21I would never notice if those were gone.

00:29:22Ever.

00:29:23Do you know what I'm talking about?

00:29:24It's still.

00:29:25Oh, yeah.

00:29:25I know what you mean.

00:29:26I'm thinking of curbs.

00:29:27No, no, no, no.

00:29:28They basically are curbs in the middle of a parking lot.

00:29:30Like the parking spots.

00:29:31Like the little block of cement that's in the park.

00:29:33I guess I don't notice them at all.

00:29:35Those are annoying.

00:29:36It's the worst when you get them all the time.

00:29:38Yep.

00:29:39The fuck did that picture go?

00:29:40Now, would you not notice it or you would just be grateful that they weren't there anymore?

00:29:45I mean, a lot of parking lots don't have them.

00:29:47Right.

00:29:47I think the fact a lot of parking lots don't have them prove their uselessness.

00:29:52So again, wheel stops at parking lots going up against the number 16 seed,

00:29:56which is now John Heater, starting with you, Mush.

00:29:59Oh, the parking.

00:30:01What are we calling them?

00:30:02Parking lot stops, I guess.

00:30:03Parking lot stoppers.

00:30:05So parking lot wheel stops.

00:30:06Thousand percent.

00:30:07Tommy.

00:30:08Yeah, that's a great spirit of the bracket submission.

00:30:11I have to go with wheel stoppers.

00:30:13Wheel stoppers.

00:30:14Jay?

00:30:16Wheel stoppers.

00:30:17They're just infringing on the rest of the parking spot.

00:30:19Like instead of having 100% of the parking spot, you have 85.

00:30:22When you have to back out of a spot instead of just going forward,

00:30:26right out is the worst because of those things.

00:30:29Are you guys back in guys or forward guys?

00:30:31I am forward as long as I can do it.

00:30:33Oh, you're back in a big back.

00:30:35I like back in the most forward in the way.

00:30:37Yeah, I don't like her.

00:30:39I wouldn't know.

00:30:39These are huge.

00:30:40I would know.

00:30:40You guys, I would know this in a second.

00:30:45If somebody told me to draw a picture of a parking lot, I would glue it.

00:30:49Oh, you're out of your mind.

00:30:50I would never put this in the parking lots.

00:30:52Yeah, I thought these were just called curves.

00:30:56They were all together.

00:30:57It'd be a curve.

00:30:58Yeah, they're not attached.

00:31:00Yeah, but I still wouldn't notice.

00:31:01Yeah, I would notice for sure.

00:31:02So we're three for wheel stops, Nick.

00:31:07Absolutely not.

00:31:08No, these are iconic.

00:31:10John heater.

00:31:10Yeah, this is not a parking lot without these.

00:31:13So one for John heater.

00:31:14Visually, yeah.

00:31:20I think these as iconic as they are, I wouldn't care to notice.

00:31:25You wouldn't notice.

00:31:26I'm not absurd.

00:31:27I wouldn't be like, oh, where are the.

00:31:28That's what everybody learns to board slide.

00:31:30I would Google John heater.

00:31:31Does our parking lot have them right now?

00:31:34I don't know.

00:31:37I don't know.

00:31:38That's why I wouldn't notice.

00:31:40So we have four for wheel stops.

00:31:42Nicky smokes.

00:31:44I'm going John heater.

00:31:45Either way, wheel stops going to move its way onward.

00:31:48Before we get to the second half, let's talk about our second sponsor of the day.

00:31:52Rocket money.

00:31:52Most Americans think they spend around 62 bucks a month on subscriptions.

00:31:55But get this.

00:31:56The real number is close to 300.

00:31:57This is literally that's thousands of dollars a year, which you probably forgotten about.

00:32:00Thankfully, we started using rocket money.

00:32:02They found a bunch of subscriptions that we'd forgotten about.

00:32:04And they helped us kill, cancel, kill, I guess.

00:32:06Same thing.

00:32:07The ones we don't want anymore.

00:32:08Rocket money is the personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions,

00:32:12monitors your spending and helps you lower your bills so that you can grow your savings.

00:32:15Rocket money will even try to negotiate to lower your bills for you by up to 20%.

00:32:18All you have to do is submit a picture of your bill.

00:32:20And rocket money takes care of the rest.

00:32:22They'll deal with customer service for you.

00:32:24Rocket money has over 5 million users right now.

00:32:25And they saved them over, it saved them a total $500 million in cancelled subscriptions,

00:32:30saving members up to 740 bucks a year when using all the app's features.

00:32:34So stop wasting money on things you don't use.

00:32:36Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash bracket.

00:32:39That's rocketmoney.com slash bracket.

00:32:42Rocketmoney.com slash bracket.

00:32:44Shout out to the folks.

00:32:45I use rocket money.

00:32:46Yeah.

00:32:46They're amazing.

00:32:47So when I went on my two week sober cleanse the first week, they said,

00:32:53I only spent like $151 that week, which is $1,300 less than my average week.

00:32:58Jesus Christ.

00:33:00So yeah, shout out rocket money.

00:33:01That's fucking insane.

00:33:03Second half of the bracket, first option is the number six seed.

00:33:06This is one I'm very curious to see how you guys feel about it.

00:33:08Because at first I was like, I would obviously notice this.

00:33:11The more I thought about it, I'm like, I don't think I would.

00:33:13Sneezing.

00:33:14So how long into not sneezing would you notice, hey, I haven't sneezed in a while?

00:33:19Would I feel like I have to sneeze?

00:33:21You know, because that's part of sneezing.

00:33:23This is tough.

00:33:25I don't know.

00:33:25I think my first cold, I'd be like, wow, I have all the symptoms of a cold.

00:33:29But I'm not sneezing.

00:33:31I don't know.

00:33:31I just don't know if I would notice it.

00:33:32And that's I sneeze every time I walk out into the sun.

00:33:35So you would definitely more know I can do it.

00:33:36Yep.

00:33:37Is it like your nose is like albino or something?

00:33:40I yeah, I think so.

00:33:41My grandma sneezes every time she eats.

00:33:44After she's done eating, she sneezes.

00:33:46I think it's a genetic thing.

00:33:47If you do a 23andMe test, it'll tell you if you're somebody who sneezes in the sunlight.

00:33:50Jesus.

00:33:51Sneezing is going up.

00:33:52It's number 11.

00:33:53See another one where like, yeah, we'll probably notice dry ice.

00:33:56How do you feel about that one?

00:33:57We never know.

00:33:59What the hell is dry ice?

00:34:01Dry ice hurts, bro.

00:34:03I went to a sushi restaurant last Friday, and it comes out with like dry ice for like the volcano.

00:34:08Have you ever gotten a package delivered and there was dry ice in it?

00:34:11It fucking ruins your hand.

00:34:13No.

00:34:13It hurts so bad.

00:34:14Yeah.

00:34:15You have certain meal things.

00:34:16You eat it, you die, right?

00:34:17It's yeah, I think so.

00:34:18Yeah, noted.

00:34:20So probably not a good death either.

00:34:23No, probably not.

00:34:23So which one of these would you be more likely to just like never notice going extinct?

00:34:27Sneezing or dry ice?

00:34:28Starting with you, Marty.

00:34:30I'm gonna go dry ice.

00:34:31Dry ice, I really...

00:34:34I mean, maybe not though, because isn't that how they do like some like smoke machines too?

00:34:40Yeah, the fact that you don't know means you're not.

00:34:42That's true.

00:34:43You would never regard dry ice.

00:34:45A lot of Chinese restaurant drinks have them.

00:34:49I'm going dry ice.

00:34:50Dry ice, Tommy?

00:34:51Yeah, I'm still not even positive what dry ice is.

00:34:55You did ask what is it?

00:34:56Yeah, so I looked it up.

00:34:59Sneezing, I think you would know that you'd have a cold, you would notice.

00:35:04Sneezing, I like a good sneeze.

00:35:05So I'm gonna go with...

00:35:06I mean, but if you asked me when's the last time I sneezed, I'm not sure, but still dry ice.

00:35:10So dry ice is the solid form of carbon dioxide turned directly into gas,

00:35:14and it warms up instead of melting.

00:35:15You guys don't sneeze every day?

00:35:16I sneeze every single day.

00:35:18I'm sure I have, but I can't tell you for sure.

00:35:20Every day?

00:35:21Maybe not, maybe not.

00:35:22Every day.

00:35:22Not every day.

00:35:23I've gone a week without sneezing.

00:35:25Probably once a week.

00:35:26Yeah.

00:35:27No shot.

00:35:28Okay, let's all track our sneezes from right this point on until next Tuesday.

00:35:33Yeah, I don't think I'm gonna be sneezing.

00:35:34Deal.

00:35:34I bet you only sneeze one day a week.

00:35:36I'll bet you that.

00:35:36I'm gonna start a note app right now.

00:35:38Sneeze camping.

00:35:40I'll be honest as well, because I don't think I'll sneeze.

00:35:43I might not sneeze.

00:35:44I'm gonna track it.

00:35:44And like, you feel them coming, so try to film as well.

00:35:47Yeah.

00:35:47And if, yeah, don't also hold it in if you feel it coming.

00:35:50Yeah, no, I'll be honest.

00:35:53So right now we have two for dry ice.

00:35:55Che?

00:35:56So I actually know the answer about sneezing and like how often you do it, because...

00:36:00Do you know how often I sneeze?

00:36:03Well, no, but after I got slammed, when I had my shoulder injury,

00:36:08well, after KB and I wrestled on Yak and I got slammed and I had an injury,

00:36:14sneezing was the most painful thing in the world.

00:36:17Like, it felt like I was getting kicked in the heart when I was doing it.

00:36:19Oh, man.

00:36:20So...

00:36:21That hurts so bad.

00:36:21You feel bad, guys?

00:36:22Yeah, I feel horrible and I always have.

00:36:24So when I was going to sneeze, I would like control myself and like hold it in.

00:36:31And I did this for, I believe, eight days.

00:36:33And then once that eight days passed, like, it didn't hurt anymore.

00:36:35And now it's like totally fine.

00:36:37But yeah, I would probably sneeze like once every two to three days.

00:36:42And it was...

00:36:44I mean, yeah, you can use that for your whatever these purposes are.

00:36:47But yeah.

00:36:48You can hold it in.

00:36:49It's pretty easy.

00:36:50Does anyone have allergies?

00:36:52Me.

00:36:53I blow my nose and sneeze.

00:36:55I have like...

00:36:55But then, yeah, sometimes you'll do it multiple times in a row.

00:36:57Yeah.

00:36:58What do you find about it?

00:36:59I just need like one 30-second run of you just ripping like two sneezes.

00:37:04Easy.

00:37:05Yeah.

00:37:06What?

00:37:07Like if you sneeze twice in a minute.

00:37:09Oh, no.

00:37:10I'm talking about days that I sneeze.

00:37:11No, no, no, no, no.

00:37:13This is how many times you sneeze in a week.

00:37:15I would say you probably...

00:37:16I said I sneeze one day a week.

00:37:18Yeah, you sneeze once a week.

00:37:20What do you mean?

00:37:21You're saying you sneeze one day a week or once every day?

00:37:24But now that, yeah, it's usually just once.

00:37:26Yeah, I do it probably once.

00:37:27Sometimes two to three.

00:37:28Okay, so once a week.

00:37:29I'll bunch three to five.

00:37:30I think I go weeks without sneezing.

00:37:32Do you sneeze twice every time you sneeze?

00:37:35Not every time.

00:37:35I usually sneeze two.

00:37:37I think most times, but...

00:37:39So I'm probably twice a week.

00:37:41I might keep track of this for the rest of my life.

00:37:44A total number of sneezes.

00:37:45So Chay, which one...

00:37:46This is something I'm into.

00:37:47I'm very excited to see who sneezes the least.

00:37:49So Chay, which one do you think?

00:37:52I notice sneezes a lot.

00:37:53So what was the other one?

00:37:55Dry ice.

00:37:55Sneezes also hurt me.

00:37:56No.

00:37:57Dry ice.

00:37:57Three for dry ice.

00:37:59Nick?

00:37:59At 38 years old, if you sneeze like it's a full body like...

00:38:03I have to stretch before I sneeze.

00:38:04You feel it.

00:38:05It's bad.

00:38:06I have to lean forward so I don't throw out my back.

00:38:07It's horrible.

00:38:08Yeah, you gotta crack your back before you do it.

00:38:11Nick, sneezing or dry ice?

00:38:14Dry ice.

00:38:15Dry ice for sure.

00:38:16KB?

00:38:17I don't know what would have to happen for me to notice the extinction of dry ice.

00:38:22I think James Cameron would have to direct a movie called Dry Ice that was all about dry ice.

00:38:28And I still wouldn't notice that actual dry ice is gone.

00:38:32So it's dry ice all the way.

00:38:34Nicky Smokes?

00:38:35Dry ice, yeah.

00:38:36Dry ice is gonna move on.

00:38:38Next up, we have the three versus the 14.

00:38:41The three, Nick won slingshots.

00:38:44I agree.

00:38:45It would take me a long time to realize slingshots are gone.

00:38:47Never.

00:38:48Never.

00:38:49But it's going up against...

00:38:50Dated Aztec.

00:38:52It's going up against number 14 seed.

00:38:54This person had a qualifier for it.

00:38:55The Charlotte Hornets.

00:38:57How long would it take you to realize the Charlotte Hornets are gone forever?

00:39:00Wow.

00:39:02The least notable of the big three sports teams.

00:39:04No.

00:39:05Oh, big three?

00:39:06They're more of a starter jacket than an NBA team.

00:39:08Yeah, their clothes are dumb.

00:39:10I think the Columbus Blue Jackets are the most forgettable of the big three.

00:39:14Yeah, so not even counting hockey, I think just among the big three sports,

00:39:16I think the Charlotte Hornets are probably the least notable of all.

00:39:19No, because Michael Jordan owned them.

00:39:21Lamello Ball is such a good character.

00:39:22Yeah, and Michael Jordan owned them.

00:39:23Brandon Miller.

00:39:25So which team would you...

00:39:25Very, very good.

00:39:26Who do you think is less known of the big three, of all big three sports teams?

00:39:29Sacramento Kings.

00:39:30I thought about the Kings.

00:39:31The Wizards are slowly getting there.

00:39:33Wizards are definitely getting there.

00:39:34Yeah, John Wall.

00:39:35I would forget about the Wizards.

00:39:37I don't think any NFL team is qualified.

00:39:38John Wall is retired.

00:39:40But still.

00:39:41That would be a baseball team.

00:39:42Yeah, I don't think any NFL team.

00:39:44I don't think...

00:39:44Like the Angels.

00:39:45If the Reds left, I wouldn't know.

00:39:46No, I would say Trout.

00:39:48Yeah, but once he's gone...

00:39:49So the Charlotte Hornets going up against Slingshots.

00:39:52Portland Trailblazers?

00:39:54I think I might notice.

00:39:56Wouldn't notice.

00:39:57Portland's kind of iconic.

00:39:58Dominating?

00:39:59Come on.

00:40:00Dominating.

00:40:01What is it?

00:40:01Slingshots and what?

00:40:03I like that.

00:40:04I like that a lot.

00:40:05It's Slingshots versus Charlotte Hornets.

00:40:06Slingshots and Charlotte Hornets.

00:40:09Boy, this is...

00:40:10I have to use a slingshot once a year.

00:40:15Like when I go camping.

00:40:16It's fun.

00:40:16I got little nephews and we just...

00:40:17All right, all right.

00:40:18Swirls and shit.

00:40:21But the Charlotte Hornets are an NBA basketball team.

00:40:23I'll go Slingshot.

00:40:24Slingshots.

00:40:25KB?

00:40:27Slingshots versus the Charlotte Hornets?

00:40:29Yes.

00:40:31The Slingshots.

00:40:32Slingshots.

00:40:33How long would it take?

00:40:34I'm just thinking like even in your world,

00:40:35because I don't know how much you watch basketball.

00:40:36Never.

00:40:37A lot of these are never for me.

00:40:38I'm not an observant person.

00:40:40You're not?

00:40:41I'm a thinker, but not a seer.

00:40:44I like that.

00:40:44A seer.

00:40:46I guess that's where we switch up.

00:40:48I observe everything.

00:40:50I don't think about it.

00:40:52I see what's going on.

00:40:52Like a camper's hair raising at dinner second by second?

00:40:55Yeah.

00:40:57Nick?

00:40:57Like when I'm at somebody's door,

00:40:59I'm not looking at the welcome mat.

00:41:01I'm thinking about what I'm going to say to that person when they open it.

00:41:03Oh, no.

00:41:04Marty's mind is just listing things he sees.

00:41:06Yeah, mine's like I just observe it.

00:41:08Like my mom, when she chews, her eyebrows go fucking nuts.

00:41:12I can't take it.

00:41:13Oh.

00:41:13Yeah.

00:41:14Are you a big like driving on the highway?

00:41:16You'll like name all the signs or like all the stores?

00:41:19No.

00:41:20What's that?

00:41:21You're like driving on the highway with like a significant other or something like that?

00:41:24You'll be like, oh.

00:41:25I do that.

00:41:25Wendy's.

00:41:26Taco Bell.

00:41:27What was the thing?

00:41:27You told me.

00:41:28I do do that.

00:41:28I think that's called ADHD.

00:41:30You told me that you like, was it you count every purple thing you see?

00:41:33Is that it?

00:41:33Well, no, I play games in my head every day.

00:41:35Like I play over under how many jerseys I see today.

00:41:38Like, or like it depends on the day.

00:41:40Yeah.

00:41:40What's the line?

00:41:41It's usually four and a half.

00:41:43I think how many you see today?

00:41:45Today was two.

00:41:46Two?

00:41:47Do in-office ones count?

00:41:48No, no in-office.

00:41:49Nothing in-office again.

00:41:50I saw a brewer's.

00:41:51Does the guy on the corner count that sells the jerseys?

00:41:53No, he doesn't count.

00:41:53Even though those jerseys are sick.

00:41:55Does jersey have to be on body?

00:41:57No.

00:41:58You just need to see it.

00:41:59And then sometimes it even counts.

00:42:00If you like, I see like a, like a Notre Dame backpack or something.

00:42:05Sometimes that counts as well.

00:42:06What about like a billboard?

00:42:10What about like a billboard?

00:42:11If the guy wearing a jersey?

00:42:12No, it's gotta be on person.

00:42:14So two for slingshots right now.

00:42:16KB?

00:42:18Slingshot.

00:42:21I'm Nick.

00:42:22Oh, shit.

00:42:22Sorry.

00:42:24My bad.

00:42:25Uh, so I sent you these this morning, Ken Jack.

00:42:28What did I fucking do this morning when I got into the office?

00:42:31Slingshot a slingshot.

00:42:32Za has one.

00:42:33Um, fucking sucked.

00:42:36Pissed me off.

00:42:37It was a blast.

00:42:37I hit Malasek right in the head.

00:42:40So with that being said, one of these is a billion dollar franchise.

00:42:46Slingshots have probably generated billions in revenue.

00:42:49This year?

00:42:51Lifetime?

00:42:51Yeah.

00:42:52I mean, it killed Goliath.

00:42:53That's a really good question.

00:42:55Yeah.

00:42:55What's generated more lifetime income?

00:42:57More money than the Charlotte Hornets.

00:42:59What's made more?

00:43:00Net.

00:43:01The Charlotte Hornets this year?

00:43:04Yes.

00:43:04They probably lose money.

00:43:05Dude, they're part of revenue sharing.

00:43:06All the teams share the revenue.

00:43:07Oh, okay.

00:43:08Dork.

00:43:08Didn't.

00:43:10Didn't.

00:43:10Oaks proposed a good question.

00:43:12Lifetime.

00:43:12Have slingshots made more than the Hornets make in a year?

00:43:17Money wise.

00:43:19Absolutely.

00:43:20Yeah.

00:43:20You saying no?

00:43:21I don't know.

00:43:22I don't think so.

00:43:23Hornets in a year?

00:43:25The Hornets give all the NBA teams share in basketball related.

00:43:28But if they didn't share and the Hornets won just off their revenue alone,

00:43:32they probably don't make.

00:43:33Lifetime?

00:43:34Like ever for slingshots?

00:43:36Yeah.

00:43:36But I mean, think about like hundreds and hundreds of years ago.

00:43:39Money was nothing.

00:43:40But as it's just a tactical one.

00:43:41I'm looking at some tactical slingshots.

00:43:43The slingshot dates back to the Bible.

00:43:45Yeah.

00:43:45But they were probably a penny.

00:43:48I can't find a slingshot that's more than $100.

00:43:51Yeah.

00:43:51But they've been around forever.

00:43:53They've been around.

00:43:53Like you're saying, like David and Goliath.

00:43:55Wait.

00:43:56$120 for the Simple Shot Cleaver Pro.

00:44:00I mean, if a guy's trading his goat for a slingshot, you still got to count that.

00:44:03Right?

00:44:03Like that's.

00:44:04Yeah.

00:44:04The goat's worth at least $100.

00:44:06Yeah.

00:44:07Slingshots are more forgettable than if the Hornets disappeared.

00:44:10Slingshots, Che?

00:44:13Definitely.

00:44:13I would notice in a day if the Charlotte Hornets.

00:44:15You would definitely notice.

00:44:15You wouldn't.

00:44:16You would definitely notice.

00:44:17And I look at the whole board every day.

00:44:19The Charlotte Hornets made $269 million last year.

00:44:23The Hornets definitely clears or rather slingshots definitely clears that.

00:44:26That's just last year.

00:44:28Yeah.

00:44:28There's just a year.

00:44:29One $269 million.

00:44:31So that made last year.

00:44:32Yeah.

00:44:33I mean, slingshots definitely cleared that.

00:44:35That's crazy.

00:44:36You think they.

00:44:36I don't think so.

00:44:37I'm not sure expenses.

00:44:38They probably lost money that year, Marty.

00:44:40No, this is revenue.

00:44:41Like that's not profit.

00:44:42This is profit.

00:44:43Yeah, I think.

00:44:45Possibly.

00:44:47So Che, you're going.

00:44:48Even in the offseason, you check the board every day.

00:44:52I mean, I would notice if an NBA franchise was gone.

00:44:55I feel like crossover grids, immaculate grids.

00:44:57But if you woke up tomorrow and the Hornets.

00:44:59I don't even mean like historically speaking.

00:45:00This thing is gone.

00:45:01It's just now gone.

00:45:02Now, like current right now, like the stadiums wiped off the map.

00:45:05All the Hornets players are gone.

00:45:06And is it a news story?

00:45:08No, no one talked.

00:45:09No, it's just it's no one noticed until that happened.

00:45:12I would notice once the NBA season starts back up again.

00:45:15I look at the standings.

00:45:16There's only four teams in this division now.

00:45:18Now, it might take me a little bit to be like, which team is missing from this division?

00:45:21Yeah.

00:45:22Tommy.

00:45:25Slingshots.

00:45:26I'd eventually get around.

00:45:27The Hornets would eventually come across.

00:45:28Slingshots.

00:45:29Slingshots to me are like a boomerang.

00:45:32Boomerang?

00:45:32Yeah, definitely the same thing.

00:45:34Where like I've never used, I think, either of them.

00:45:36Oh, I've definitely used slingshots.

00:45:37I feel like boomerangs don't work.

00:45:39I also kind of agree with that, too.

00:45:41I feel like I've never seen a boomerang actually in action.

00:45:43Now we have the number seven seed versus the ten seed.

00:45:45The seventh seed is the 31st day of months.

00:45:48So any day that every month has the 31st day, get rid of the 31st day.

00:45:53I would notice this instantly.

00:45:55It's gone forever.

00:45:56You just immediately go to the next month.

00:45:57And that's going up against number ten seed.

00:45:59Specifically, not landlines, but house telephones.

00:46:02So houses with a landline telephone.

00:46:05So start with you, Marty.

00:46:0631st of a month.

00:46:09Would have no idea that those are gone.

00:46:12If everything ended at 30.

00:46:14Really?

00:46:14If everything ended at 30, I'd be like, yep.

00:46:16Sounds good.

00:46:17Everything should end at 28, and there should be 13 months.

00:46:19But that's a story for another day.

00:46:21So one for 31st day of months.

00:46:25Why 13?

00:46:27Add another month for the extra days that you add off from the 20.

00:46:31So then there's exactly four weeks in every month.

00:46:34That'd be perfect.

00:46:35I don't want an extra month, though.

00:46:37Where would you put it, the extra month?

00:46:39It's the same amount of days.

00:46:40What would you name the month?

00:46:42I don't know.

00:46:44Something Roman.

00:46:45What would you name it?

00:46:46I don't know.

00:46:47When would my birthday be?

00:46:49Yeah, it's the 29th.

00:46:50I'm born on the 29th.

00:46:51Oh, true.

00:46:52You get to pick it.

00:46:53Be one day less.

00:46:54No, that's fine.

00:46:58One for the 31st day of months.

00:46:59Tommy, what was it up against?

00:47:01The house telephones.

00:47:02The house telephone.

00:47:03I would know.

00:47:04I know how many days.

00:47:05I'm not one of those guys.

00:47:06What would you name them?

00:47:07Who doesn't know the days and months?

00:47:08I'm autistic.

00:47:09I know all the dates.

00:47:10Jeremy.

00:47:11House telephone would never.

00:47:13The only house telephone is still when I'm home with my parents.

00:47:16They don't even pick theirs up anymore.

00:47:18I would never be like, why isn't it ringing?

00:47:20So I'm going to go with the house phone.

00:47:22One to one, Shay?

00:47:24Yeah, house phone.

00:47:25There's the knuckle trick where it's like January, February, March.

00:47:29Every knuckle is the 31st day.

00:47:31When you put them together, it equals out.

00:47:35Yeah, definitely the house telephone.

00:47:37Wait, explain that one again.

00:47:38The knuckles have 31 days.

00:47:39Put your hands together and you start with a knuckle like on your left hand.

00:47:45Yeah, it's January, February, March, April, May, June, July.

00:47:48And then it goes up to the next.

00:47:50Basically, just every other.

00:47:53Is that too many knuckles?

00:47:56Yeah, there's more knuckles than months, but it.

00:48:00Uh, so right now we're three to two in favor or three to one in favor of house telephone.

00:48:04Nick?

00:48:06Yeah, house telephone.

00:48:07If.

00:48:09The 31st day of the month disappeared.

00:48:13We December 31st.

00:48:14Cy was born.

00:48:15What would Cy say?

00:48:17New Year's Eve would be ruined.

00:48:19Yeah, what would he say?

00:48:20Why would New Year's Eve be ruined?

00:48:21Still, it would be the 30th.

00:48:22Because there's no 31st.

00:48:24It would be the 30th.

00:48:25Yeah, yeah.

00:48:26But now you're just discriminating.

00:48:27Well, you wouldn't know.

00:48:28You are discriminating.

00:48:29We are so discriminatory against it.

00:48:32KB?

00:48:34Yeah, I would notice tomorrow.

00:48:37The calendar one.

00:48:38You guys don't pay attention to the 31st.

00:48:41Sometimes you get paid on the 31st.

00:48:43That's yeah.

00:48:43On a Saturday.

00:48:44Broke boys know.

00:48:46Oh, no.

00:48:48Oh, no.

00:48:51Broke boys know.

00:48:52Nicky smokes.

00:48:54Uh, landline, home telephones for sure.

00:48:55Those things kick rocks.

00:48:57Yeah, I think I would notice.

00:48:58I wouldn't.

00:48:59I don't think we could have counted regularly.

00:49:00You guys wouldn't notice tomorrow that if it was the 1st of August.

00:49:04Nope, I would notice.

00:49:05You would definitely notice.

00:49:06But that's like a different brain thing.

00:49:08I think my broke ass checked today to see if I was getting paid on the 31st or the 1st.

00:49:12Now we have the two seat versus the 15 seat.

00:49:14The two seat is couch pillows.

00:49:15That's another Marty one.

00:49:16I kind of agree with you.

00:49:17The more I think about it, the more I'm like, I don't use.

00:49:19Not cushions.

00:49:21Couch pillows.

00:49:22Couch pillows.

00:49:22Decorative couch pillows.

00:49:23What would you sleep on if you ever pass out at your boys crib?

00:49:26Yeah.

00:49:27I feel like couch pillows are a necessity.

00:49:29Regular pillow.

00:49:30How many times you fall asleep in your boys crib?

00:49:33I mean, what do you know?

00:49:34Never go to college or black out in high school.

00:49:38I know you're old and washed now, but I feel like that's a normal thing to have couch pillows.

00:49:42I just don't think I would recognize.

00:49:44I think I just fall asleep on the couch.

00:49:47And just lay on.

00:49:48If you are as drunk as you're saying, you probably don't notice.

00:49:51Like you could fall asleep on a cushion.

00:49:54Yeah, but it's not a pillow.

00:49:56And then your head's not elevated properly.

00:49:58Then you wake up with a stiff neck.

00:50:00Yeah, I don't know.

00:50:01I wouldn't recognize it.

00:50:03This is going up against our number 15 seed, which is another play in game.

00:50:05First up, there's one where I don't know the reference point here, but this is for

00:50:08KB and Nick.

00:50:08Someone submitted it.

00:50:10Hurricane simulators.

00:50:11Unless you're Nick and KB's friends with the batteries.

00:50:15Yeah, we used to have a friend who would go in the hurricane simulator and put

00:50:17batteries in his palm.

00:50:18They'd fly around.

00:50:19He died.

00:50:20Wait, from doing that?

00:50:22Like dead Marcus.

00:50:23Yeah, the one at the mall.

00:50:24He put batteries in it and it hit him?

00:50:27Yeah.

00:50:27Jesus.

00:50:28He died from that?

00:50:29Yeah.

00:50:30That's insane.

00:50:30Called him to death.

00:50:31That kind of makes sense.

00:50:33Dead Marcus.

00:50:34Darwinism.

00:50:34Well, we had two Marcus's in our friend.

00:50:37Dead Marcus.

00:50:38We call him dead Marcus now.

00:50:41Next, there is from Nikki Smokes cashiers.

00:50:45Cashiers.

00:50:45Yes, you would.

00:50:48That's insane.

00:50:50They're already extinct, bro.

00:50:52There's maybe one cashier left in every grocery store.

00:50:56Not a chance.

00:50:58All right, so don't go for me.

00:50:59It's free.

00:51:00Another Nikki Smokes one.

00:51:02A co-worker.

00:51:06Which one?

00:51:06Wait, what co-worker?

00:51:08No, that's all it said.

00:51:09It was a co-worker.

00:51:10Yeah, but name one that you wouldn't know.

00:51:11That's a good one.

00:51:14Like, there's multiple.

00:51:15Like, not in this office, but like jobs I've worked where people have disappeared and I

00:51:19have no idea.

00:51:20That's actually not a bad point.

00:51:22Yeah, that's pretty good.

00:51:24Another Nikki.

00:51:24Somebody you saw every single day for years on end.

00:51:27I would forget.

00:51:28No, but sometimes.

00:51:29No, I'm being sarcastic.

00:51:32Next.

00:51:32Shallow relationship.

00:51:33Was another Nikki one.

00:51:34Women's sports.

00:51:38Not now.

00:51:39I think I'm spitting.

00:51:40It would probably take me a month.

00:51:42I don't think I'd notice.

00:51:44I'd only notice like the hot ones not having jobs.

00:51:47And a Tommy one.

00:51:48Jelly beans.

00:51:50Yeah, I could go forever without knowing.

00:51:53What are you going to give out to the kids for Easter, asshole?

00:51:56Yeah, the Starburst jelly beans ruin that.

00:51:58Yeah, I don't give kids things.

00:52:01I don't give kids candy on Easter.

00:52:04Well, one day you might have a kid and he might want jelly beans.

00:52:07I don't like jelly beans.

00:52:08He's going to get a Cadbury caramel egg and he'll like it.

00:52:11It's delicious.

00:52:12And then Lastly, another Tommy one.

00:52:14Hair conditioner.

00:52:16Yeah, like what?

00:52:17Yeah, conditioner.

00:52:19You must have dog hair.

00:52:20Yeah, conditioner.

00:52:21I just use shampoo.

00:52:22You should use shampoo.

00:52:25I just use shampoo.

00:52:26I use conditioner.

00:52:27You should use conditioner all the time.

00:52:30Because I used to shampoo every day.

00:52:31I don't shampoo every day.

00:52:34I would have guessed that's why your hair is gone.

00:52:36That's my theory.

00:52:37No.

00:52:37Yeah, because I was just drying all the follicles.

00:52:39All right, I'm with that.

00:52:40Same here.

00:52:41Yeah, I was doing.

00:52:44I was shampooing every day until I was told that's stupid.

00:52:48Yeah, yeah.

00:52:49There's some people like they're like, you should go months without doing it.

00:52:52I think that's what Fight says he does.

00:52:55Yeah, he barely does it.

00:52:56I got a very popular subreddit where the boys.

00:52:58No poo heard each other.

00:52:59No poo.

00:53:00I would have guessed hard money that Nikki Smokes is using like the eight in one conditioner

00:53:04where it's like conditioner, body wash, hand wash.

00:53:06Back in the day, yeah.

00:53:08Toothpaste.

00:53:09Now it's like everything.

00:53:10Leave in conditioner.

00:53:12Ass soap, everything all in one container.

00:53:15So to run through the options again, the hurricane simulators,

00:53:19cashiers, a co worker, women's sports, jelly beans or hair conditioner.

00:53:23Let's start with you, Nikki Smokes.

00:53:24Which one do you think should move on against her to see a co worker?

00:53:28Just a co worker.

00:53:29Like even like when we downsize, there was so many people I didn't realize were gone.

00:53:33You also weren't here.

00:53:34That's good.

00:53:35I was only there.

00:53:36I was only there for like a week when that happened.

00:53:38But yeah, I'm going to make room for your bloated ass.

00:53:43Sorry, five people.

00:53:50Oh, man, it depends on where I'm working.

00:53:53Here, I would eventually notice anyone leaving.

00:53:56At the New York office, there's some salespeople I didn't meet.

00:53:59So a co worker.

00:54:00But for me now, jelly beans.

00:54:03Jelly beans for sure.

00:54:04I don't think I would ever notice.

00:54:08I don't like jelly beans, so I never am seeking jelly beans out.

00:54:12So I don't think I'd ever notice.

00:54:13I'd say neither am I.

00:54:14And load up Bertie Botts.

00:54:15I don't even know what that is.

00:54:17Should they have bogey flavor?

00:54:19Is that Harry Potter?

00:54:20Yeah.

00:54:20Sometimes you can either get like a chocolate or it tastes like bogey.

00:54:26I love that one joke where they're like,

00:54:27do you remember the one scene in the first Harry Potter movie where he just

00:54:29carry buys all of the candy?

00:54:31I'll take the long.

00:54:32Yeah, and like everyone else in the train is fucked.

00:54:34Like no one else can have candy.

00:54:35They're going to starve.

00:54:36It's a long ass train.

00:54:37Nick.

00:54:40Uh, probably co worker.

00:54:42Yeah.

00:54:43Especially old jobs.

00:54:44Here, it's like it's more of a like, I don't know, camaraderie to it and all that shit.

00:54:47But like an old jobs for sure.

00:54:50Jay.

00:54:51Well, we as we talk about who gets fired.

00:54:53That too.

00:54:54Yeah.

00:54:54That's also.

00:54:55Yeah, that happens.

00:54:56Jay.

00:54:58Conditioner.

00:54:59I don't think it's necessary.

00:55:01It doesn't even feel as good as shampoo.

00:55:03I don't know why people would use that.

00:55:04Never rubbed your junk with conditioners.

00:55:06Your hair feels so smooth when you with conditioners.

00:55:09I might buy some conditioner.

00:55:10I don't know.

00:55:11Everybody uses feels great.

00:55:12I'll use one of my hotel.

00:55:14That's number one jerk off and shower lubricant.

00:55:17Correct.

00:55:18Conditioner.

00:55:18Yeah.

00:55:19Really?

00:55:20For sure.

00:55:20Oh, Jay.

00:55:21Steven has got some conditioner.

00:55:24Guys, I gotta go.

00:55:28He's gonna run away like a conditioner.

00:55:29Like a little bit, uh, uh, a little bit like rougher.

00:55:32Like, no, it's the opposite.

00:55:34No, it's like, it's just harder to get out of the bottle.

00:55:37I understand what the name conditioner.

00:55:38It's a little confusing.

00:55:41No, it's it's it's smooth.

00:55:43It's good.

00:55:44Yeah.

00:55:44Some people use it as lubricant for pocket pussies.

00:55:47It's also true.

00:55:48It's a fact.

00:55:49Jay, you're gonna, you're gonna have your whole mind opened up by this.

00:55:51I think your eyes gonna be like, why the fuck is he in the shower for 10 hours?

00:55:54The shower is terrible.

00:55:56No, I was conditional.

00:55:57Conditioner might change your mind.

00:55:58Yeah.

00:55:59Uh, so one for hair conditioner, Tommy.

00:56:01Uh, jelly beans.

00:56:03I don't like jelly.

00:56:04I'd actually, I wish they were gone.

00:56:06I don't like jelly beans and it makes me angry when other people like jelly beans.

00:56:09I don't know why.

00:56:10I just think they're not that good.

00:56:12I do remember the Harry red jelly bellies.

00:56:13What?

00:56:14You ever had jelly bellies?

00:56:15Yeah.

00:56:16I don't like them.

00:56:17That's the one that tastes gross, right?

00:56:19Like some of those tastes gross.

00:56:20Yeah.

00:56:20I don't.

00:56:20The butter popcorn.

00:56:21Oh yeah.

00:56:22I used to have those as a kid.

00:56:23The ones that taste gross.

00:56:25They all taste gross.

00:56:26Jelly beans.

00:56:28Jelly beans.

00:56:29It's jelly beans.

00:56:30Have you guys had the, uh, the berry nerd clusters?

00:56:35No.

00:56:35I heard that.

00:56:36Oh yeah.

00:56:36The nerds got me clustered.

00:56:37They are top tier candy.

00:56:39S tier.

00:56:40Unbelievable.

00:56:41Like certainly I'm having a problem weaning off.

00:56:45Those are way better than jelly beans.

00:56:47Oh my God.

00:56:47No, that was just off topic.

00:56:49It's just because they're so good.

00:56:51Balls.

00:56:52So jelly beans versus couch pillows, Marty.

00:56:55For me, couch pillows.

00:56:58I do.

00:56:58It would take so long to notice.

00:56:59I just wouldn't notice whatsoever if the decorative pillow wasn't there.

00:57:03If I went home tonight and my three couch pillows were gone,

00:57:06I would notice immediately.

00:57:07I would start accusing my roommate of stealing the couch pillows.

00:57:10I like my couch pillows.

00:57:12I put one right between like the couch armrest and the couch.

00:57:15And I rest my arm on that.

00:57:17I recently bought more couch pillows.

00:57:19Couch pillows are very important.

00:57:20This guy's obsessed with couch pillows.

00:57:21I would get rid of jelly beans immediately.

00:57:23Amen.

00:57:24One to one, Che.

00:57:26I'm a big fan of jelly beans,

00:57:28but jelly beans are popular for like a couple of weeks,

00:57:31like in late March, early April for Easter.

00:57:33And after that, you're not really having too many jelly beans.

00:57:36They're not like super prominent in stores or anything like that.

00:57:39Couch pillows I would notice immediately.

00:57:40Why is jelly beans popular on Easter?

00:57:42Are they?

00:57:42I don't know.

00:57:43No, they are.

00:57:43They're definitely.

00:57:44It's Halloween.

00:57:45You fill Easter eggs.

00:57:46Oh, that's probably why.

00:57:48Nick.

00:57:48A lot of candies can fit in Easter eggs, though.

00:57:50Big M&M's.

00:57:51That's true.

00:57:51But jelly beans are super practical because they like don't melt.

00:57:54True.

00:57:55Yeah, yeah.

00:57:55Different colors.

00:57:56The Starburst ones are incredible.

00:57:57They actually are.

00:57:58The pink one.

00:57:59Incredible.

00:58:00Best here.

00:58:02I'm going to go jelly beans, though, just because I use a couch pillow every day.

00:58:06Right now, we're two to two.

00:58:08Watch Desperate Housewives.

00:58:09Three, one.

00:58:11Two for couch pillows.

00:58:12You get couch pillows.

00:58:13Three, one.

00:58:13I use couch pillows so often.

00:58:16More than the word table.

00:58:18I've used couch pillows more than I've said the word table.

00:58:23So I'm going to go jelly beans.

00:58:25That's a good way to think of it.

00:58:27I would love a chart of the words I said the most.

00:58:29Oh, that would be the best.

00:58:30Do you think fuck's in your top ten?

00:58:32No.

00:58:34I say fuck every time.

00:58:35A lot of the prepositions would be high.

00:58:36Is there a word like?

00:58:39Okay, yeah.

00:58:39Is there a word you wouldn't notice was gone?

00:58:41Fuck might be up there.

00:58:42Word you wouldn't notice is gone.

00:58:44There's got to be millions.

00:58:45Not like a word that.

00:58:48Like a common use.

00:58:50Yeah, a word that would be gone.

00:58:51Nicki Smoak wouldn't notice.

00:58:53No.

00:58:58Oh, shit.

00:58:59We're in time for the video to freeze, too.

00:59:00That's funny.

00:59:01I love you.

00:59:02You're fucking hilarious.

00:59:05You guys are frozen right now.

00:59:07We had no idea how that reaction went.

00:59:09You guys were frozen laughing.

00:59:11It was just frozen with Nicki Smoak's glare.

00:59:13I judge people based off their couch.

00:59:17I judge people based off their couches.

00:59:19So I'd notice if they didn't have pillows.

00:59:21So jelly beans for sure.

00:59:22You have a good couch.

00:59:23That's like the best part of my apartment.

00:59:25I have the best couch of all time.

00:59:27Tommy is my couch.

00:59:28It's a really comfortable couch.

00:59:29But I think you would know.

00:59:30It's got pillows.

00:59:31You would notice those couch pillows were on.

00:59:33They're a major part of the couch.

00:59:36I don't know.

00:59:36So jelly beans going to make it on through.

00:59:40Before we get into...

00:59:40Yeah, it's a shame, though.

00:59:41Yeah.

00:59:42Couch pillows, I think, is a really good one.

00:59:43That was a very, very good one.

00:59:45Before we get to the last one, let's hear from Babbel.

00:59:47Do you want to learn a new language?

00:59:48The best way is to uproot your life.

00:59:51Drop yourself in the middle of a new country and figure it out from there.

00:59:53Psych.

00:59:54But if you're not ready for that, you can still learn a language.

00:59:57The next best way with Babbel, speak like the whole new you with Babbel.

01:00:02Science-backed language learning app that gets you talking.

01:00:04Wasting hundreds of dollars on private tutors is the old school way of learning a new language.

01:00:08Babbel's 10-minute lessons are quick and handcrafted by over 200 language experts

01:00:12ready to get you talking a new language in as little as three weeks.

01:00:15Because talking is the key to really knowing any language.

01:00:18Babbel is awesome.

01:00:19I used it to help learn a bit more Spanish.

01:00:20It was awesome.

01:00:21I mean, honestly, Nikki Smokes, you could probably use it for down in Miami,

01:00:24learning a little bit more Spanish, too.

01:00:26It would definitely help you out.

01:00:27So bye, Babbel.

01:00:28I can speak Spanish.

01:00:29You can speak Spanish completely?

01:00:32I don't believe that.

01:00:33No chance.

01:00:34I don't believe that.

01:00:35¿Por qué te no callas?

01:00:37OK.

01:00:38Whatever.

01:00:39Muy bien.

01:00:40I said, why don't you shut up?

01:00:42And you said, very good.

01:00:44Yep.

01:00:46And I said, bendición.

01:00:47Here's a special limited time deal for our listeners.

01:00:49Right now, get up to 60% off your Babbel subscription.

01:00:52But only for our listeners at babbel.com slash lights.

01:00:54Get 60% off at babbel.com slash lights.

01:00:57Spelled B-A-B-B-E-L dot com slash lights.

01:01:00Rules and restrictions may apply.

01:01:02Never forget, Stephen Chay said he'd rather have $20.

01:01:05Than instant fluency in any language in the world.

01:01:09So playoff time.

01:01:10Now we have first the iPhone apps.

01:01:12The default iPhone apps like the Keynote.

01:01:14What was it?

01:01:14Files.

01:01:15Like all that other shit.

01:01:16Shortcuts.

01:01:17Yeah.

01:01:17Going up against Tandem Bikes.

01:01:19Let's start with you, Nicky Smokes.

01:01:23Ah, this is actually a good one.

01:01:25I'd probably say Tandem Bikes.

01:01:27Tandem Bikes over the iPhone apps.

01:01:28Yeah, Tandem Bikes, final answer.

01:01:29KB?

01:01:30Man, both never, but Tandem Bikes.

01:01:40One day I could maybe I'd want one.

01:01:42Or at least rent one with a partner.

01:01:44I don't know.

01:01:45Two for Tandem Bikes.

01:01:46Nick?

01:01:48Um, no, it's the apps.

01:01:51We look through your phone.

01:01:53You can't even name them all.

01:01:54That's what I would say.

01:01:56Apps less likely.

01:01:57No, you won't.

01:01:58You're on your phone every day.

01:02:00I deleted.

01:02:00I noticed that before Tandem Bikes.

01:02:02I couldn't have named one without scrolling through.

01:02:05Yeah.

01:02:06Keynote.

01:02:07I've never opened it.

01:02:08iBooks.

01:02:08Bible app.

01:02:10That's on my bottom.

01:02:12That's at the bottom bar that doesn't move.

01:02:14That's what I figured.

01:02:14It's pre-installed.

01:02:15That, iBeer calculator.

01:02:17iBeer, legendary.

01:02:19Do you still have it?

01:02:20Did you get any new DLCs on iBeer?

01:02:24I mean, I still have it because I spent money on it, but.

01:02:27Jay?

01:02:29I'll download something.

01:02:33For me, it's the apps.

01:02:35The apps for sure?

01:02:36Yeah.

01:02:36Three for the apps, Tommy?

01:02:37Yeah, I think it's more likely that one day, 20 years from now,

01:02:42I've got a family on the boardwalk at a beach like,

01:02:44oh, let's get a Tandem bicycle more than I'd ever say.

01:02:47Where the hell is my fucking Keynote app?

01:02:49So I'm going to go with the Keynote app.

01:02:52The apps, Marty.

01:02:54You just switched me there.

01:02:55Yep.

01:02:56I was going to say Tandem.

01:02:57I can invite somebody to a quick match on iBeer.

01:02:59What the fuck does that mean?

01:03:01Quick beer.

01:03:02Katie Stats is the only other person on iBeer, right?

01:03:04Yeah, it's the only other person I can play.

01:03:07It's Katie Stats.

01:03:07I don't like Katie Stats.

01:03:08Speaking of gummy clusters, Ria just said,

01:03:10I just got up for a walk because how many nerds gummy clusters I just had.

01:03:15We're having a problem at the house right now.

01:03:16But not Jelly Bean.

01:03:18No, no, it's not Jelly Bean.

01:03:19But yeah, I'm going with the apps.

01:03:21Yep.

01:03:22The apps are going to move on.

01:03:22Now we have the wheel stops in parking lots versus the handkerchiefs.

01:03:26And again, specifically the booger handkerchiefs.

01:03:30This one's tough.

01:03:31This is a championship matchup.

01:03:32This one's tough because I really like that, the tire stopper.

01:03:36But handkerchiefs are always like, to me, a myth.

01:03:40I don't think anyone actually used them.

01:03:42Except for Nick.

01:03:42Besides now, Nick.

01:03:44I can't believe you went home and like,

01:03:47you washed your underwear and your handkerchief together.

01:03:49Phone wallet, keys, handkerchief.

01:03:53Checking all your pockets to save your handkerchief.

01:03:56Yeah.

01:03:59We still have a handkerchief drawer.

01:04:03Do you guys have tissues in your house?

01:04:04Yeah.

01:04:06Is that way more practical?

01:04:09I don't know.

01:04:09I just would put a handkerchief in my back pocket.

01:04:11You can get a lot of uses out of it.

01:04:12What are the uses besides the boogers?

01:04:16I don't know.

01:04:16But I'm saying you blow your nose and it would still like,

01:04:18it would kind of like, dry out.

01:04:19You could use it all day.

01:04:21It would dry out?

01:04:23That's pretty gross.

01:04:26I don't know, man.

01:04:26I didn't think about it.

01:04:29What's it going up against?

01:04:32It's handkerchiefs versus the wheel stops.

01:04:35Handkerchiefs.

01:04:36Tommy?

01:04:37This is tough.

01:04:39I would really never notice if either of these were ever gone.

01:04:45It's tough.

01:04:46It's really hard.

01:04:46This should be a championship.

01:04:48This is like a zero versus zero.

01:04:49I guess the parking lot.

01:04:54This is easy.

01:04:55One of these are everywhere and the other is nowhere.

01:04:57Except for Nick's drawer.

01:04:59I guess handkerchiefs.

01:05:00I wouldn't notice.

01:05:04I never drive.

01:05:06But I'm never going to ask for a handkerchief.

01:05:08I might abstain.

01:05:09I would never notice if either of these were gone.

01:05:12You have the option to abstain.

01:05:12I'll give my one abstain.

01:05:14And somebody else has the option to double vote.

01:05:16Let's not forget that.

01:05:17Che?

01:05:19Handkerchiefs.

01:05:20Handkerchiefs.

01:05:20I don't think I've ever used a handkerchief.

01:05:22Nope.

01:05:22Two for handkerchiefs.

01:05:23I'm going to ask Nick.

01:05:24I'm asking my mom for a picture of the handkerchief drawer.

01:05:26Please do.

01:05:28It's handkerchiefs though because one is literally everywhere.

01:05:32Yep.

01:05:34I feel like there are more places in Chicago then.

01:05:36I feel like there's not a lot of...

01:05:38Well, in the city though.

01:05:39There's not a lot of parking lots in New York City.

01:05:41Also true.

01:05:41Oh, you get outside of the cities.

01:05:43I feel like Long Island might have.

01:05:46Cities are just parking lots.

01:05:47Yeah.

01:05:47Kimmy?

01:05:49Handkerchief.

01:05:50Nicky?

01:05:50Hanky.

01:05:51Handkerchief.

01:05:51Hanky's going to move on.

01:05:52The handkerchief is going up against the iPhone apps to go into the finals.

01:05:56Wow.

01:05:57NickySmokes.

01:05:59Shit, that's really tough.

01:06:02I mean, I voted against the iPhone apps last time, so I'd probably go handkerchief again.

01:06:06Yeah, hanky.

01:06:07One for the hanky.

01:06:08KB?

01:06:09The handkerchief.

01:06:10The handkerchief.

01:06:12Nick?

01:06:13I'll go handkerchief.

01:06:14Wow.

01:06:15Handkerchief.

01:06:15It's about to sweep it.

01:06:16Che?

01:06:17Handkerchief.

01:06:18Handkerchief.

01:06:19Handkerchief.

01:06:20Hanky.

01:06:20I'm assuming hanky as well.

01:06:22Hanky going into the finals.

01:06:24On the other side for getting through.

01:06:26Slingshots versus dry ice.

01:06:28A matchup everyone's been waiting for.

01:06:31Marty?

01:06:31Great together.

01:06:33Yeah.

01:06:34It's dry ice.

01:06:35Slinging dry ice at somebody would be sick.

01:06:36Dry ice versus slingshots.

01:06:39That'd be like a killstreaking cod.

01:06:41That'd be so sick.

01:06:42I'm going to go dry ice.

01:06:44Dry ice over slingshots?

01:06:45These are both I would never, ever.

01:06:48You guys use slingshots still at the office?

01:06:53Yeah.

01:06:53Nick used one today.

01:06:54Is it fun?

01:06:54Yeah.

01:06:55It's a blast.

01:06:56It's great.

01:06:57I'm going to go dry ice then.

01:06:58Dry ice.

01:07:00I just, I don't know enough what dry ice is to want to keep talking about it.

01:07:06So I'm going to vote for slingshots.

01:07:08Going to vote for slingshots.

01:07:08Overwhelming me every time dry ice comes up.

01:07:11One to one Che.

01:07:13Slingshots.

01:07:14Slingshots.

01:07:17Nick?

01:07:17Although does that include the slingshot car?

01:07:20No.

01:07:21Okay.

01:07:22Nick?

01:07:23Because I would know.

01:07:23I would love to have one of those.

01:07:25Slingshots.

01:07:26Slingshots.

01:07:28KB?

01:07:29Yeah.

01:07:30Hunger Games.

01:07:32I'd watch it in the future and they'd be doing this with nothing.

01:07:37Wait, so then you're voting for dry ice?

01:07:38I thought she was an archer.

01:07:40Oh, what movie?

01:07:41She was an archer.

01:07:42David versus a painting of David and Goliath.

01:07:45I don't know.

01:07:45Bart Simpson.

01:07:46Bart.

01:07:48Yeah.

01:07:48Bart Simpson.

01:07:49So you're voting for dry ice then?

01:07:50Oh, I feel like there's slingshots at sporting a lot to go with the team.

01:07:54Oh, yeah.

01:07:55Those are usually guns.

01:07:57Yeah.

01:07:58Right now, I'll be slingshots.

01:08:00Occasionally, we are three to two in favor of slingshots.

01:08:02Nicky smokes.

01:08:03Wow.

01:08:04Slingshots in favor.

01:08:06Three to two in favor of slingshots.

01:08:08I'm going dry ice.

01:08:09Dry ice.

01:08:11All right.

01:08:11We're tied up.

01:08:12I think in my mind slingshots.

01:08:13I like your dry ice should be a sweet.

01:08:16What?

01:08:17I think in my mind, right?

01:08:19Slingshots.

01:08:19If I was looking at something like you were saying, like a David versus Goliath painting,

01:08:22I would definitely notice if like David just didn't have a slingshot.

01:08:27Maybe.

01:08:27I had no idea David had a slingshot.

01:08:29That's how he.

01:08:30How often do you look at that paint?

01:08:32Should never.

01:08:32Word of God, Marty.

01:08:35Is he holding one in the statue of David?

01:08:36I think so.

01:08:37I guess that's how he kills Goliath.

01:08:38No, he hits him in the face with a slingshot.

01:08:41David versus Goliath is in the Bible.

01:08:42Yeah.

01:08:44Goliath is a posse.

01:08:46I thought it was Greek mythology.

01:08:50No, no, no, no.

01:08:50Honestly, Saint David is like a super biblical name.

01:08:54Like that would be like, you know, mistos versus something, you know what I mean?

01:08:57But I would think if I try to think of where else I would even see a slingshot,

01:09:00that would make me think about it.

01:09:01And like almost never Bible sounds like the fucking slingshots.

01:09:06Yeah.

01:09:06David, our story Bible is lit.

01:09:08You probably would love the old Testament.

01:09:10I probably do love the old Testament.

01:09:11Yeah, I think slingshots.

01:09:14I would notice over time.

01:09:15Dry ice, though, too, because there's so many different events

01:09:17where dry ice is used as like for part of the performance.

01:09:20But I'm trying to think of what?

01:09:21Name three.

01:09:22I knew you were like, oh, yep, that's dry ice right there.

01:09:26I don't know.

01:09:26If you get a meal delivery service, then there is usually dry ice.

01:09:29The only time I got dry ice was from that.

01:09:32What's the famous pizza place in Chicago?

01:09:34They sent it to Dana once and it was dry ice everywhere and it hurt so bad.

01:09:40Oh, I thought it was to the office.

01:09:41It might have been the office too, yeah.

01:09:43And it was all in dry ice and it hurt everyone's pants and shit.

01:09:46I would notice it in shipping.

01:09:48I don't like the idea of dry ice.

01:09:49Everybody keeps talking about it.

01:09:50I don't know.

01:09:51Oh, it's horrible.

01:09:52Is this giving you like a fucking visceral pain?

01:09:55I wish I knew what this was.

01:09:57I'm sure I do.

01:09:58I'll send you some.

01:09:59I think that I would say I would notice dry ice before slingshots.

01:10:06So I got to vote for slingshots being I would notice it.

01:10:08We should still end the show on Pat today.

01:10:11Yeah, no matter what, I feel like he should just still decide the final.

01:10:15He's earned it.

01:10:16So on the other side, jelly beans versus home telephones.

01:10:19Starting with you, Nicky.

01:10:22Home telephones, 100%.

01:10:24I feel like they're already extinct.

01:10:26Basically, yeah.

01:10:27Like most younger families, like older people do still use them.

01:10:29KB?

01:10:30Yeah, I don't know how that happens.

01:10:31There are so many in like movies and television.

01:10:34Yeah, if you look about.

01:10:35True.

01:10:35Jersey Shore.

01:10:36Yeah, but they could just call this telephone.

01:10:39That'd be an easy fix.

01:10:40And you want to be like, oh, that used to be.

01:10:41Yeah, no, no, I'd be reminded phone would be a disaster.

01:10:45Actually, I don't think in this context, I don't think it wipes it from history.

01:10:48It's just like tomorrow.

01:10:49They're gone in real life.

01:10:51Okay, I think I would know how long until you remind and how long do you remember?

01:10:54They were a thing.

01:10:56Did you guys I mean, my house always had one.

01:10:59Oh, yeah.

01:11:00Yes.

01:11:00My parents abandoned it kind of early in the era because we all it's like feel much like

01:11:04the next day after we have a cell phone to get rid of the landline there.

01:11:07Why do we have this?

01:11:08Just call us.

01:11:10So right now we're.

01:11:11That's the bad news line usually.

01:11:13Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:11:15That's a death call.

01:11:16That's always or the snow day call.

01:11:19Yeah, that's true.

01:11:21There's usually always bad, though.

01:11:23So one for home telephones, KB.

01:11:26Yeah, I would never notice home telephones, maybe jelly beans.

01:11:29So I'll go home telephone.

01:11:31Two for home telephones, Nick.

01:11:33Home telephones.

01:11:34Telephones, Jay.

01:11:36Telephones are gone.

01:11:37I would go jelly beans.

01:11:38I really hate jelly beans.

01:11:39I would want jelly beans to home telephones versus slingshots to go into the finals.

01:11:44Marty slingshot for sure.

01:11:46Slingshots for sure.

01:11:48Tommy, I'm going home telephones.

01:11:52Okay, it's just so hard.

01:11:53I'm really struggling with which one.

01:11:58I'm going to go home.

01:12:00Telephone.

01:12:02You're like uncomfortable, but you're like beet red, bro.

01:12:06Uh, slingshots.

01:12:09Just think about those slingshots.

01:12:12I'll go slingshot.

01:12:14If I went home one time, I'd be like, oh, what happened to our home telephone to my parents?

01:12:17I'd never go back and be like, where's our slingshot?

01:12:20Slingshot's such a cool word, too.

01:12:21Oh, great.

01:12:22We did slingshot.

01:12:24Yeah.

01:12:24He's going first slingshot.

01:12:25Yeah.

01:12:25Two for slingshot, Jay.

01:12:27If the home telephone went away, would this like motion for a phone be?

01:12:31Because this is not a practical.

01:12:33Well, I think kids nowadays do this.

01:12:35Do they?

01:12:36What?

01:12:36Really?

01:12:37Yeah.

01:12:38Where did you get that?

01:12:39No, they do this.

01:12:40The kids do this for phone, and they do this to roll down the window.

01:12:44You're an idiot.

01:12:44What?

01:12:44No, I'm not.

01:12:46Why wouldn't they?

01:12:47Yeah.

01:12:47Yeah, I guess so.

01:12:48I think I'd still go like this.

01:12:50Bro, it's call me.

01:12:51No, I'd go like this.

01:12:51Because you knew that.

01:12:52I mean, you never held a phone like this, though.

01:12:55Yeah, you did.

01:12:56Why are you holding it like that?

01:12:58What the fuck are you doing?

01:12:59You do this.

01:13:00No one does this.

01:13:02It's this.

01:13:04Bro, his fingers don't work.

01:13:05It's crazy.

01:13:07I think I was doing, like, the spider, man.

01:13:10Wait, so this is fun.

01:13:11Yes.

01:13:12Yeah, I don't think I do that.

01:13:14Yeah, it's fucking devil horned.

01:13:16Hello.

01:13:16Why don't I leave his thumb out, too?

01:13:18What the fuck?

01:13:20I hurt my fingers.

01:13:22It's never skip any resident.

01:13:26Two for Slingshot, one for Nut for Kyle.

01:13:28Like, your nephew, if you asked him to do.

01:13:32But I've seen this online.

01:13:33Yeah, they would probably do this.

01:13:35That's so weird.

01:13:37I do phone.

01:13:38Home phone.

01:13:38That's so weird.

01:13:39Che.

01:13:40This against Slingshot?

01:13:42Yeah, it's home phone for Che.

01:13:44Nick.

01:13:45There is way more home phones in pop culture than there are Slingshots.

01:13:52I would be reminded that home phones were a thing before Slingshots.

01:13:55Three for Slingshots, KB.

01:13:56I would never be like, where's the Slingshot?

01:13:58Where's the Slingshot?

01:14:00But I could see myself telling my kid, like, oh, we used to use landline.

01:14:05They'd be like, what's that?

01:14:06And then I'd be like, let me show you.

01:14:07Then I'm fucked.

01:14:09You're completely for a liar.

01:14:11Yeah, Slingshot is going to move on.

01:14:13But Nikki smokes.

01:14:17I would say landline.

01:14:18You would say landline.

01:14:19Either way, Slingshot versus the hanky going into the finals.

01:14:23Is this Pat here?

01:14:25Pat's here.

01:14:25Is this the finals or to go into the finals?

01:14:28This is the finals.

01:14:29Got it.

01:14:29So I bet Pat might have a handkerchief on him.

01:14:32So should we just like not even us vote?

01:14:34Like, let's just let him decide like straight up.

01:14:38Yes, I agree.

01:14:39Let's just go grab him.

01:14:40You think you can find an image or a clip of somebody

01:14:43holding or using both of these at the same time?

01:14:46Impossible.

01:14:47No, I guarantee you cannot because Slingshot is a two handed thing.

01:14:50Has anyone ever tweeted both of those words in the same tweet?

01:14:54Oh, my God.

01:14:54Might be a guy who's like handle is on a cell phone in the car.

01:14:58Handkerchief Slingshot is kind of a fire name.

01:15:01Oh, I don't know.

01:15:03Slingshot handkerchief.

01:15:05Oh, boy.

01:15:05I can't wait to see.

01:15:06Slingshot brings all the hobbits to the yard and they're like,

01:15:09I forgot my handkerchief.

01:15:10We have to go back.

01:15:11Tweet it in 2013.

01:15:13What the fuck does that even mean?

01:15:14No likes on that, right?

01:15:15You tweeted it?

01:15:17No.

01:15:17Okay.

01:15:18So do you have a handkerchief, a metal bat, $20, a slingshot,

01:15:21preferably expired candy, a heart eraser and three different flower seeds?

01:15:25So it's been.

01:15:26That's what this person needed.

01:15:28I slingshot my panties across the hall for him to keep as a handkerchief.

01:15:32Okay, Pat, you're coming back up.

01:15:35That's a good one.

01:15:36All right.

01:15:36Because that makes sense.

01:15:36Pat, once again, is making the decision, the final call on this one.

01:15:41Okay.

01:15:41So the idea of the bracket here is which one of these things would you be less likely

01:15:46to notice if it went extinct?

01:15:48So tomorrow this thing is gone forever.

01:15:50Okay.

01:15:50How long would it take you longer to notice, basically?

01:15:52Okay.

01:15:52So handkerchiefs, but specifically the handkerchiefs that you blow snot into.

01:15:56Yes, I remember them well.

01:15:58Yes.

01:15:58Remembers them well.

01:15:59Yeah.

01:15:59My father used to wipe my face with it.

01:16:02Wait, with his booger handkerchief?

01:16:03No, they would lick it and then they'd wipe your face when you were a kid.

01:16:06Yeah.

01:16:06Okay.

01:16:07And that's going up against slingshots.

01:16:09Okay.

01:16:10So which one of these things would you be less likely to notice was gone forever?

01:16:13Is gone from everywhere.

01:16:15You cannot find one ever again.

01:16:18I'm going to go with slingshots.

01:16:21Slingshots.

01:16:22You wouldn't notice slingshots.

01:16:23No, I wouldn't notice them.

01:16:24They'd be gone forever.

01:16:26When I was younger, I would notice slingshots.

01:16:28Yeah, but handkerchiefs you would notice.

01:16:30Yeah, handkerchiefs I'd notice.

01:16:31Yeah.

01:16:31So slingshots are going to be the big winner of the bracket episode 137.

01:16:34Well done yet again, Pat.

01:16:36Okay.

01:16:36And once again, I don't think we actually noticed it.

01:16:38Okay.

01:16:39I don't think we referenced it at the end of one of the last episodes.

01:16:43When you're talking about parrots, there was a little bit of confusion.

01:16:48I thought you said which city compares to Paris.

01:16:51Yes, yes.

01:16:52So I went with a northern city up near Canada.

01:16:55Yes.

01:16:56And you thought we were talking about Paris, not parrots.

01:16:58That made way more sense.

01:17:01He said Portland, Maine.

01:17:03You guys weren't on that episode, but we brought Pat in.

01:17:05We were like, it's actually a good question for you guys, because I don't think any of you are on.

01:17:08What US city do you most associate with the birds parrots?

01:17:15Pirates.

01:17:16Key West.

01:17:16No, what city?

01:17:17What city?

01:17:18Oh, Key West.

01:17:20That was a big answer.

01:17:22We brought Pat in, and he said Portland, Maine.

01:17:25Yeah, because he thought we said Paris.

01:17:29He knew that it was a big population of French people in Portland, Maine.

01:17:32It all came together.

01:17:34But anyway, that's the winner.

01:17:36Big winner of episode 137, Things We Wouldn't Notice Go Extinct, is slingshots.

01:17:39I love that.

01:17:40I think that's a great winner.

01:17:41Great, great winner.

01:17:42We'll be back next week with a brand new topic.

01:17:44But until then, see you guys next time.

01:17:56I'm going to have to bring it up.

01:18:04The last time the Olympics were going on, me, Kyle, and Jeff had our own parlay in the sports

01:18:09book, and Jeff put out his special Olympics parlay, not thinking that it's a special.

01:18:16You remember that?

01:18:17I have a screenshot of it.

01:18:19Dude, the special.

01:18:20Can we add Marty and Clemmer to the group chat?

01:18:24Yeah, me as well, honestly.

01:18:26Throw one in there.

01:18:27Marty, you paid your dues, brother.

01:18:31I keep getting the special Olympics calling me.

01:18:34Really?

01:18:35That's kind of funny.

01:18:36Wait, the special Olympics called you?

01:18:38Yeah, I took a screenshot.

01:18:39Yeah, you can tweet that out.

01:18:40Yep.

01:18:41They keep calling me.

01:18:42They want me to compete.

01:18:43I can't figure it out.

01:18:44They must be watching Marty versus.

01:18:46Special Olympics.

01:18:49I used to work the special Olympics.

01:18:50Wait, is it an address?

01:18:52The Bears play on special Olympics drive.

01:18:55It's a number.

01:18:56Yeah, it's a special Olympic.

01:18:57I text Trent once every two years.

01:18:59Had to send him a text.

01:19:00I got Trent to add me to my NY Times mini crossword leaderboard.

01:19:06Oh, no.

01:19:06His times.

01:19:07Oh, my God.

01:19:08They were so bad.

01:19:09Three minutes.

01:19:10No, dude, you got to give up.

01:19:12I made fun of him so much, he unadded me.

01:19:15Yeah, he texted me and said, you guys are so mean.

Category

Transcript

Recommended