00:00I want to be a hoe, but I also want to fall in love.
00:02I don't think that those things have to be mutually exclusive.
00:05In the age of online dating, it seems like having multiple casual relationships is the norm.
00:09But if that's all true, why is there such a stigma around hooking up with multiple people at once?
00:13Hi, my name is Josh, and I think it is perfectly okay to hook up with multiple people at one
00:18time.
00:18I think it's totally fine to hook up with multiple people at the same time.
00:22I don't know. I'm on the fence.
00:24Have I dated multiple people before? I have.
00:27I tried. I failed miserably.
00:29I've always been very honest and open with people.
00:32I've never tried to hide the fact that I'm seeing multiple people at the same time.
00:36I don't know. I just think it's fine.
00:38I was in a really long relationship, and I recently just became single.
00:42So I don't know. Maybe I'll be that person in a few months.
00:45Dating is a lot of time and a lot of effort.
00:48And if you're going to do it with multiple people, you can, but you're going to take a lot away
00:53from yourself.
00:54There's a lot of unspoken assumptions that can be really dangerous for people who are in casual dating, for example,
01:00like consent.
01:01I think that there is less of a taboo than there used to be, but still more of a taboo
01:06for women than there is for men around having casual sex.
01:09Hate to blow your minds here, but there is a double standard when it comes to hooking up with multiple
01:13people at once.
01:14Check out my diary from when I was 12 years old.
01:17I don't understand. When a guy hooks up with many girls, he's called a pimp in a good way.
01:23When a girl hooks up with many guys, she's called a slut in a bad way.
01:26Huh? Before I thought hooking up was cool. Now it's slutty.
01:30How did we get here?
01:32Good question, 12-year-old Serena. How did we get here?
01:35I absolutely think that there is a double standard with men and women when it comes to dating multiple people.
01:41It's just not fair. Like, why can women do one thing and it's wrong and a man can do it
01:46and it's totally right? That doesn't make sense.
01:48Most people sleep with more than one person in their life, at least in Western society.
01:53We're all ashamed of this thing that most people do.
01:57Women are just as interested in non-monogamy as men are.
02:01When do women get to decide that they have the power in this situation?
02:05And why is it that that script is flipped?
02:07This is an okay thing. Like, you're not hurting anybody. You're not killing anybody. You're not lying. You shouldn't be
02:13lying.
02:13The problem is that women are supposed to be these moral gatekeepers that men are not expected to be.
02:18We can combat these double standards by just being a bit more honest and open about the reality of our
02:24love lives.
02:24And the reality is people date multiple people. It is what it is. It's been happening since the dawn of
02:30time.
02:30It'll continue to happen. So let's just talk about it. Let's have these conversations.
02:34I'm, like, known for being, like, super blunt on dates. Sometimes in the middle of the day, I say, hey,
02:38just to let you know, I'm just looking for something casual.
02:40And I think it's really empowering for, like, a woman to communicate and be honest with, like, what she wants,
02:45especially, like, in the face of society that expects women to be the opposite of that.
02:50I feel empowered by doing any of the things that I want and choose to do.
02:56Any time you give yourself the option to just do what makes you happy or what makes sense to you
03:01in that moment, it's just awesome.
03:04As long as everyone is being open and communicative and being honest with themselves and with each other, then there's
03:11no reason why these relationships shouldn't work out.
03:13But the person that you need to be most honest with is yourself.
03:16If you want to date multiple people, more power to you. Just please be open and transparent and have that
03:22line of communication there.
03:23Dating is fun. You're supposed to live and learn and figure things out about yourself, figure things out about people.
03:30You have to experience. You have to grow. That's what dating is all about.
03:33Always have an open mind. You know, never immediately judge something just because it's out of your comfort zone.
03:39You know, you never know what's going to happen, and I think casual dating is an amazing way to meet
03:44a lot of new people and also, like, to expose yourself to a lot of different perspectives, you know, whether
03:48it be bad or good.
03:50Be honest. Use a condom. You'll be happy.
03:54People feel all sorts of ways about multiple casual relationships, so it's important to remember that everyone has a choice.
04:00So be open, communicate, and remember, practice safe sex.
